[High Praise! to Liberal Logic 101]
Archive of entries posted on 9th October 2014
Now It’s a Musical Comedy
A taxpayer-funded musical about global warming closed early because of bad reviews.
That amuses me. Although “because of blizzards” would’ve amused me more.
Representative Keith Ellison Applauds California Consent Rule
At a press conference this morning, Representative Ellison was asked his opinion on the California legislation that required an ‘affirmative, conscious and voluntary agreement before engaging in sexual activity’ on California college campuses. Representative Ellison had this to say:
“I think the ‘yes means yes’ rule, or the ‘si means si’ rule as it is more commonly known by California residents and the colleges’ custodial staffs, is a wonderful idea that is bringing the state one step closer to the ideal of Sharia Law. While it is a good idea, I think we need to take it further if we want to protect women from date rape and men from false accusations of date rape. In this, the wisdom of Sharia is clear. As we all know, according to the Quran, a woman’s testimony is only worth ¼ that of a man’s. In a he said/she said situation, the woman cannot be believed. Consequently, the affirmative consent should be witnessed by either a second man or four additional women, and since it is within the right of the participants to withdraw consent at any time throughout the encounter, it would behoove the witnesses to remain present and observant throughout. While the witnesses have to be there anyway, they might as well each voice affirmative consent, witnessed in turn by all present, and join in; however, in that case it would be wise to videotape the proceedings, preferably with an Apple product connected to the Cloud to keep it secure. Since Sharia is silent regarding the number of video recorders required, I would recommend a minimum of three placed strategically to record the entire encounter thus ensuring the safety and continued consent of all involved. Afterwards, following a considered review of the witness statements, the video recordings and marital status of those involved, stoning of the women may commence as necessary.”
Oddest Mashup Ever
Via Think Geek: Firefly Clue
The ship is quiet… too quiet. Something is off. Something is wrong. Someone is missing. It’s River! Everyone checks again, but River is nowhere to be found on Serenity. She’s not in the Cargo Bay; she’s not in the Kitchen. Everyone gathers together to figure out what in tarnation is going on. Fingers point, accusations fly, and clues are searched for. That’s right, you’re looking at Firefly Clue.
River has been betrayed and handed over to the Alliance! Now with Firefly Clue, help the Serenity crew discover who is working with the Alliance, what they used to betray River, and where on Serenity the kidnapping took place. Was it Inara with the Med Kit in the Engine Room? Or Mal with the Leather Necklace in the passenger dorm? Solve the mystery and save River! Amygdala not included.
If you’re gonna get it, get it quick, before some soulless broadcasting conglomerate cancels it.
Link of the Day: Satire – Obama: If I Had a 2nd Son, He’d Look Like Ray Rice
[High Praise! to ScrappleFace]
Obama: If I Had a 2nd Son, He’d Look Like Ray Rice
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Wisdom of the Day: Intellect Baby Katana Witch Read Chuck
CATS: We got a lifetime of naps and belly rubs. What about you?
HUMANS: Superior intellect
C: Cool what's it for?
H: Math and feeling bad
— Nice Hippo (@NicestHippo) September 21, 2014
Baby Lawyer: Did you steal the victim's nose?
Accused: No. *cries into palms
Baby Judge: O, great, he's disappeared again.
— Hoppers (@FrogAvalanche) August 30, 2014
what's on your back?
"a katana"
what?
"it's a japanese sword used…you know what *takes back résumé* I don't think I wanna work here"
— Brent (@murrman5) October 8, 2014
I didn't even know there was a blood moon last night until now. Mostly because I'm not a witch trying to perform a ritual.
— Matt Fernandez (@FattMernandez) October 8, 2014
I don't obey stop signs. How am I supposed to read and drive? Totally unsafe.
— Ristolable (@Ristolable) October 8, 2014
Not sure how this thought process works: “Let’s get Jon Stewart to host our show!” “He won’t do it.” “Okay then, Chuck Todd.”
— Allahpundit (@allahpundit) October 8, 2014
Historic!
Michelle Obama bragged how her husband had changed the country, saying “think about how our kids take for granted that a black person or a woman can be President of the United States.”
And someday they may even get to see one who’s good at the job.
Obama Warned Us – Poverty
“In America, no one who works full-time should ever have to raise a family in poverty.” —President Obama http://ofa.bo/i0mY
Fortunately, under Obamacare, you’ll only be working part-time, so that’s not a problem then.
Straight Line of the Day: If You Think You Have Ebola, the First Thing You Should Do Is…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
If you think you have Ebola, the first thing you should do is…
Traditions
I’m in full, old man, get off my lawn mode. And, it’s a college football team that set me off.
First, some background. You may already know that I’m a fan of the University of Georgia. My daughter went there (and she was a cheerleader) and I almost went there. But I didn’t.
However, a little closer to my home town in southeast Georgia is another college, Georgia Southern University. Back then, it was Georgia Southern College. And, they didn’t have a football team. But, that would change.
In 1981, Georgia Southern announced the hiring of Erk Russell as head coach. Russell had been defensive coordinator at the University of Georgia for the previous 17 seasons, but accepted the challenge of starting up a football program from scratch. The school had no football facilities when Russell was hired. In fact, they didn’t even have a football. The Athletic Director had to run across the street to the K-Mart to buy a football as a prop at the press conference to announce Russell’s hiring.
Georgia Southern did things simply back then. They got old yellow school buses from the Bulloch County school system to take the team to games. And in those games, the Eagles wore simple white pants with no stripe down the leg, simple blue jerseys at home and plain white jerseys on the road with no stripes on the sleeve, and blue helmets with numbers on the side. Old fashioned, simple football uniforms. And the reason is because they were the cheapest available.
Turns out, though, that you don’t need fancy buses or fancy uniforms to win. Georgia Southern won the Division 1-AA national championship 1985, their first of three under Russell, and six overall. And they did it while wearing cheap uniforms and riding yellow school buses to games.
Today, and for several years, Georgia Southern has been able to afford a lot more. This season is their first year moving up to Division 1-A, officially called Division 1 FBS (Football Bowl Subdivision), and they’ve kept the traditions.
This weekend, though, they’re kinda ticking me off. They’re showing off some new uniforms to be worn special for homecoming. And they have the nerve to call it “Traditions.”
I know all the cool schools do this crap. But, it’s crap. At least, to a traditionalist like me. I hate it when schools come up with gimmicky uniforms. You know what kind of gimmick I like? Winning.
It’s a great tradition, too.
Random Thoughts: Rights and Libertarians
If it involves someone else having to do something other than just leave you alone, it’s not a right.
Oh, I solved the puzzle: J.K. Rowling is taking over writing the next two books of Game of Thrones.
Wait, libertarians aren’t disciples of Joe Lieberman? Then what the hell are they?
*libertarian president takes office
“It’s time for freedom and–”
“BUT WHO IS GOING TO PAVE THE ROADS?!!”
*libertarian movement collapses
Change
The heirs to the Rockefeller fortune (rooted in Standard Oil) say they plan to “give up” all investments in fossil fuels for the good of the planet.
Pity we can’t get the Clintons to give up politics for the same reason.