Straight Line of the Day: ISIS Threatened to Attack DC. In Response, Obama Tweeted…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

ISIS threatened to attack DC. In response, Obama tweeted…

“With your permission, we will not be intimidated.”

33 Comments

  1. “When it happens, just let me be clear.”

    “I am hereby directing the D.C. police immediately cut their manpower and budget in half.”

    “Walrus said I could declare D.C. a violence-free zone. Done.”

    “BTW, Walrus is reading IMAO at this very second, the NSA tells me. LOL.”

  2. DC, now our nation’s chitlin capitol and bacon warehouse.

    Announced Operation Fast From Sun-up To Sun-down And Furious to track their weapons purchases.

    An exective order ceding the presidency to the Speaker of the House.

    Heh, that sounds like their attacks will be contained to a very small area to me.

    That Biden will be firing his shotgun
    at random intervals until the threat or his term has expired.

  3. “I would would like to remind everyone that we have no credible threats to our country at this time. We shall stay with our strategy with respect to ISIS because it will work and it’s the right thing to do. The attack on Paris was not just directed at that beautiful city, but on the shared values of all…
     

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            *BOOM*

  4. ISIS threatened to attack DC. In response, Obama tweeted…

    First let me be serious for a moment and declare that Obama’s little whinefest about people complaining about his lack of action and leadership in regards to terrorism is an encapsulation of everything that is wrong with liberalism and left in this country. It is sad and one cannot find the appropriate words to express that sadness he creates in our collective soul. The man, the very person that he is and wants to be, is a disgrace to this country its history and its promise. Back to the funny.

    #8 It wasn’t quite a LOL but certainly a warm guffaw and hearty chuckle escaped my lips.

    Fine, I’ll be in Paris watching the Varsity game on global warming.

    he was going to double down and attack Washington first.

    just be sure to keep your carbon footprint as small as possible.

    You guys, such kidders!

    Whatever. Can you score me some Captogon dude?

  5. Just installed our new house band, Eagles of Death Metal in the West Wing, me and the girls will be @BoiseMotel6 for the duration.

    Now that’s one disaster that won’t go to waste, I’m literally drooling here #President Barack H. O’Chubbie

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