Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Now being used to calm angry people stuck in long airport TSA lines…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Now being used to calm angry people stuck in long airport TSA lines…
…Muzak featuring Wagner.
Free tickets for travel on Egypt Airlines.
(it is never too soon)
…Vietnamese Pot Belly pigs.
…political ads on a loop on all the flight status screens.
…Soma…
…impromptu massages by eager TSA staffers…
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
IPODs with all of Obama’s speeches.
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
Kevin Bacon
. . . chloroform (Bob B beat me to Soma)
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
What lines, Comrade?
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
new Muslim counselors
the same thing being used to calm the long lines of angry illegal aliens at the Mexican border.
sternly worded letters from the UN General Assembly.
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
borrowed safe spaces fro local universities.
….the promise of a better life in Cuba.
…John Kerry reciting Vogon poetry from memory, thus having the side benefit of bumping Vogon poetry up to the WORST poetry in all the universe.
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
…Anonymous’ cookies with walnuts
…switching from TSA MO to Border Security MO
…launching those angry people from giant slingshots into rickety structures protecting TSA agents
free pot
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
reassurance that their flight is late anyway
pat downs from young blondes
…all TSA agents have been issued neuralizers. http://www.amazon.com/Men-Black-Lights-Sounds-Neuralizer/dp/B007AUL40I
Now Being Used to Calm Angry People Stuck in Long Airport TSA Lines…
Soothing body cavity searches performed by caring TSA professionals with hearts and even BIGGER hands!
…is playing both kinds of music, Country AND Western.
…is a poster of Edward Scissorhands with the caption “Consider yourself lucky, he has the day off today…”.
…is a poster of Freddy Kruger in a TSA uniform with the caption “Consider yourself lucky, he has the day off today…”.
…pamphlets telling them that if they need to take a piss and go to the back of the line, they can use whatever bathroom they want.
@7: Took me a minute to get it. I must be getting old!
… ChilLAX posters at LAX.*
Counterproductive are the “EEK” signs at Eek Airport in Eek, Alaska (pop. 296). Which I now want to visit.
…tranquilizer darts (They worked for Marlin Perkins!)
Oatmeal rasin cookies disguised as chocolate chip because TSA doesn’t actually care about your feelings.
BZ