Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
…must find a new ‘clown car’ since VW discontinued the beetle.
…won’t happen.
will feature a Rockettes style line of trans dancers.
…will give Swalwell’s chair to Steyer.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
24 enter, 1 leaves.
Then the other 23 leave after being declated the winner.
In parts.
…will feature Jello wrestling.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
well I’m not saying it will involve an Alien but… it will involve and Alien.
… will have 90 minutes of paint drying on a wall.
Unfortunately, there’ll be a bunch of boring politicians standing between the camera and the real action.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will have a swimsuit competition.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will use Democrat pollsters to compile the ratings.
… will be catered by Memories Pizza.
A spokesman for the pizzeria is said to be “surprised” by the announcement.
….will feature wrench dodging… If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a question.
will be held at Thunderdome
Hey now, we don’t need another hero.
How about a sub?
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will have feats of strength and airing of the grievances.
Socialist justice for the rest of us.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will be replaced by reruns of Golden Girls.
…will have monitors re-playing every Obama speech ever.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will let illegals vote in the Nielsens.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will feature old fashioned test patterns.
…be a cool sign on the moon…just a picture of a test pattern.
Hey now, that’s my shtick…
…will be like mating elephants (no reference to the GOP intended):
1. it will be done at a high level.
2. It will be done with a great deal of roaring and stomping around.
3. It will take two years to see results.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will be declared a safe zone from down twinkles.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will have all non-watchers doxxed and hounded from social media and civil society.
…say the secret word, win a subpoena…
…will be done playing Twister on a large plastic mat. (…and I’d pay good money to see that)
I know Buttigig is looking backward for it.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will be watched Comrade. It WILL be watched.
will include a Chinese firedrill.
…will bring back the gong…
With special guest appearances by The Unknown Comic and Gene Gene The Dancing Machine.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will have the winner take home a free ride on the “Lolita Express”.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
will feature a cliff hanger ending.
♫ DUM, DUM, DUMMM ♫
Poor ol’ Cliff.
“Join us again next time: Same bats*** team, same bats*** channel.”
Everyone! BATUSI!!!!
I would, if I wasn’t already in the midst of doing so.
That Pulp Fiction move is difficult to master after you’ve had a couple of bat utility belts, if you know what I mean.
… will include Debate Bingo cards for each candidate. “Racist” will be the free space.
… will feature Beto spinning plates on sticks, then spinning stupidity in both English and Spanish.
… will be moderated by The Squad.
… will include presentation of the Democrat Unforgotten Lifetime Loser award during the telecast. This year’s DULL award nominees include Hillary!, Obama, Kerry, Biden, Dukakis, Gore, Carter and Mondale. Vote early. Vote often.
…is still searching for a Kennedy.
Have they combed the drug rehab facilities yet?
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
Will not be held in Rock Ridge due to an ongoing brawl in town between Antifa thugs and the town residents.
… with Bernie Sanders looking into the camera and asking, “Have you ever seen such cruelty?”
Good one Oppo.
…will feature social media promotions by Russian bots.
…will become a new reality TV show…. The Amazing DisgRACE.
…will be hosted by Steve Harvey.
…will be picture-in-picture on the Weather Channel.
…will be formal dress, blackface and tails.
…AOC on the panel to make everybody look smarter.
…will be an episode of MST3K
…beans and a campfire.
In order to boost ratings, the next Democrat Debate…
…will offer free Hookers & blow.
…will be moderated by Donald Trump.
Matter and Anti-matter cannot exist in the same space.
….will have a DJT look-alike in a dunking booth.
But they will throw like Obama and he’ll never get wet.
…Will be subtitled in Spanish and Russian.
They can also put it in sign language for America, one big ol’ middle finger.
… will be titled “The Game of Drones: Red Weeding.”
…will provide the audience all the 3-day old produce they can throw.
…will be preempted by cat videos. DamnCat unavailable for comment.
…will be billed as Regular Programming Aborted To Bring You This Debate.
…Yoko Ono will sing written responses.
…will be a game show: Washington Redskins “Hog” fan, or Democrat?
…will be broadcast on snowy VHF channel in suburbs with AOC hosting Dialing For Dollars segments every commercial break.
AOC as Banna White
…will include both kinds of music…country AND western!