Gulliver

I think I should have read Gulliver’s Travels by now, but I haven’t. I just never go around to it.

It was published October 28, 1726. A lot of the writing from that time is … different. But, not having read the novel, I don’t know if that’s one of that odd type of writing. So, for those reasons, I haven’t read it.

Okay, that’s not true. I haven’t read it because I’m too lazy to get it and read it.

So, should I? Is it any good? I mean, yeah, it’s a classic, sure. But is it really any good. Should I go out and buy it?

IMAO Time Machine: IMAO Podcast #4 6-20-05

The 4th IMAO Podcast, from 2005. — The Editors


  1. Pre-introduction w/ Frank & Kevin
  2. Introduction & sponsors (spiced up & not as boring this time)
  3. “World of Knowledge” w/ host Frank J: Geocentric vs. Heliocentric solar system models
  4. Harvey: Fun Facts about Arkansas Part 1
  5. Hate-filled Lefty gets therapy
  6. Harvey: Fun Facts about Arkansas Part 2
  7. Right Wing Duck’s Border Report
  8. SarahK reviews The Cat in the Hat
  9. Lawrence Simon’s Crappy Bedtime Stories: Goldilocks & the Three Bears
  10. George Bush & the Saudi Ambassador
  11. Frank Discourse (Roundtable): Dick Durbin’s complaints about interrogation techniques
  12. Frank: Conclusion, listener email

Five O’Clock On a Saturday (Song Parody)

Flashback: Remember when some guy who called himself Barry Soetoro was president?  Crazy times. But they did give rise to some good music: for instance, this collaboration by Oppo and Gumbeaux-funkle. All the best lines are from Gumbeaux.


It’s five o’clock somewhere Saturday.
The Regulator crowd shuffles in.
There’s an old woman sitting on TV
Whose whole life has been lying and spin.

She says, “CNN won’t you play up my mammaries?
I’m not truly sure how it goes.
But I’m sad in my suite ‘cause I’m gonna get beat
And a prison cell soon will enclose.”

Lie lie lie, lie lie lie.
Lie lie, lie lie lie, lie lie.

Chorus:
Tell us some lies, you’re Soetoro man.
Tell us some lies tonight.
We’ve endured eight long years of your treachery.
Go away, we’ll be feelin’ delight.

Now Bill, who’s disbarred, is a friend of mine.
And his wife is as crooked as he;
And he’s quick with his poke or to light up his “smoke”
When he’s someplace that he’d rather be.

He says, “Prez, no more interns are thrilling me
I’m too old and too weak for the chase.
Well I’m sure that I could be a porno star
As opposed to an impeached disgrace.”

Oh lie lie lie, lie lie lie
Lie lie, lie lie lie, lie lie….

Bill’s a Whitewater real estate novelist
Who never had time for his wife.
And he’s talking with Jarrett, who’s dangling a carrot
They should all be imprisoned for life.

And the witless are practicing politics
As the big donors slowly get stoned.
Yes, they’re sharing a drink they call “Parse This,”
But it’s best to call a payoff a loan.

Chorus:
Tell us some lies, you’re Soetoro man.
Tell us some lies tonight.
For eight years you’ve looted our treasury.
Go away, we’ll be feelin’ delight.

It’s a tiny Dem crowd for a Saturday
They just dropped a handful of dimes.
But I know that it’s me, they’ll be coming to see
When pardons they’ll need for their crimes.

And my spokesmen all sound like compost,
Coming from Valerie our puppeteer
Yet they sit at the bar thinking I’m a rock star
Though I’m mentally stuck in first gear.
Oh lie lie lie, lie lie lie
Lie lie, lie lie lie, lie lie.

Chorus:
Tell us some lies, you’re Soetoro man.
Tell us some lies tonight.
You are clueless and so elementary.
Go away, we’ll be feelin’ delight.

Even Liberals. Even Liberals.

Bill Maher: ….The Clintons ‘Gotta Go Away’…..
washingtonexaminer | 10/26/2019 | Zachary Halaschak

The host said he thinks that speculation of a Hillary Clinton presidential run is damaging the ability of Democrats to successfully beat President Trump in 2020.

“It seems like every few months, Hillary Clinton bubbles up again, and people are, like, ‘Oh, she’s thinking about running,’ or she says something crazy,” Maher said.

“The Clintons — they’ve gotta go away. I’m saying this now a year out … They can’t be at the convention,” he continued. “Maybe waving or something”…“And Bill is damaged goods,” Maher said of the former president.

Maher also repeated comments from conservative former Republican Rep. Justin Amash of Michigan that Hillary Clinton is “a Donald Trump asset.”

“I’m Sorry Norah. I Can’t Do That.”

Joe Biden Scoffs at Fundraising Trouble as Campaign Reverses Course on Super PACs
Breitbart | 25 Oct 2019

Joe Biden scoffed at his recent fundraising troubles in a soon-to-be-aired interview with 60 Minutes, claiming his campaign was on course to do “extremely well” — an opinion not shared by his own aides.

The former vice president, who this week reversed his position on accepting help from super PACs, made the remarks when asked by CBS News’s Norah O’Donnell if he still considered himself the Democrat frontrunner.

O’Donnell, particularly, noted that Biden had not only lost his polling advantage but had also fallen behind competitors like Sens. Bernie Sanders (D-VT) and Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) in fundraising.

“I just flat beat them,” Biden responded with a laugh before adding that his campaign was “on a course to do extremely well.” He said, “I’m not worried about being able to fund this campaign. I really am not, truly.”


Gazing steadily from a red eye, he tried to convince Ms. O’Donnell, advised her to take a sedative, and refused repeated requests to open the pod bay doors.


A Time For Choosing

Ronald Reagan’s political career is generally thought to have begun during his “A Time For Choosing” speech on October 27, 1964. He actually was involved in politics prior to that, of course, but that speech was extremely important for Reagan’s political career.

This is a long one. You might want to save it and come back, whenever you have a spare 30 minutes.

[The YouTube]

What Reagan said is as important today as it was 55 years ago.

IMAO Time Machine: Cheney’s Full Plan for Afghanistan

Frank J. gave us a peek behind the scenes in 2009. It didn’t work because Obama wouldn’t follow through. — The Editors


Looks like Cheney is taking over our strategy for Afghanistan by yelling at Obama until he gives in again. Cheney said the Obama administration is just copying the plan he left them and calling it a new plan. I don’t think they’re copying the whole plan, though, because here’s what I found out was in it:

CHENEY’S PLAN TO DESTROY THE TALIBAN

  • First wave is an increase in ground troops.
  • Second wave is ground troops backed by skyscraper-sized robots who eat people.
  • Third wave: Velociraptors.
  • As the Taliban should be fleeing now, shoot them with space lasers.
  • Also, nuke all countries around Afghanistan so there is no place to flee to.
  • On second thought, nuke everything. Screw it all!
  • Sell whatever is left at a discount to Halliburton.
  • Drink a strong liquor while chuckling to self.

Non-Anonymous Sources Wanted

Unlike the New York Times, we deal in reputable and named sources around here. And a Friday before a weekend is a great time for a news dump — specifically, any ideas you may have for thought-provoking “Straight Lines of the Day.” You can submit your testimony behind closed doors, but we’re still going to leak your name anyway.