I don’t really get the point of the Surgeon General’s warning on cigarette packs since everyone already knows cigarettes are unhealthy and that doesn’t seem to be stopping anyone. In other countries, they even make the warning take up most of the pack, but no one seems to care. I think the Surgeon General might as well have some fun and put some more interesting warnings on those cancer sticks.
FRANK SUGGESTIONS FOR SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNINGS
Ha!!!
if the indian revenge thing is true, then shouldn’t we, in the spirit of multiculteralism, embrace smoking?
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: Frank J. has been known to commit crimes against hilarity.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: This product works best with a condom. In fact, EVERYTHING does. The younger, the better — woo hoo.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: Using these may keep hippies away.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING:
Smoking in public, or your car, or your own basement, or on the surface of Pluto, may cause liberals to spontaneously combust with rage, exploding in messy red chunks. Use of eye protection is recommended.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING:
The user of this product is likely to punch, throat-chop, or spin kick meddlesome, do-gooder Liberal idiots who seek to obstruct his enjoyment of it.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING:
If you lose these, someone else will smoke them.
You should change that one to “MATHEMATICIANS have proven that cigarettes are cylindrical”! It’s just the kind of thing we’d go about proving.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING:
Smoking is actively condemned by dumocrats. Smoke weed instead.
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: Please do not allow small children to light cigarettes while unattended.
You should change that one to “MATHEMATICIANS have proven that cigarettes are cylindrical”! It’s just the kind of thing we’d go about proving.
Well, you have to get a 2 million dollar grant from the government first to prove this…
While I realize I’m going to agro just about everybody with this comment, I just can’t help it.
(might have something to do with losing both parents to cancer and suffering lung issues as well)
Give out a cynide pill with each pack with the Warning “Take the pill it’s faster”
SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: Caution, may cause your life span to decrease significantly. But, they’re the ones at the end, so light up!