Note: This is NOT a parody.

Paragraph 2 is especially choice.

Successful Test-fire of Newly Developed Super-Large Multiple Rocket Launcher Held Under Guidance of Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un

Korean Central News Agency of DPRK via GlobalSecurity.org

Pyongyang, August 25, 2019 (KCNA) — Kim Jong Un, chairman of the Workers’ Party of Korea, chairman of the State Affairs Commission of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea and supreme commander of the armed forces of the DPRK, guided the test-fire of newly developed super-large multiple rocket launcher on Saturday.

The Supreme Leader of the Party, state and armed forces learnt about the development of the super-large multiple rocket launcher system and issued an order to start the test-fire.

The test-fire proved that all the tactical and technological specifications of the system correctly reached the preset indexes.

He gave high appreciation, saying that it is, indeed, a great weapon, our young national defence scientists are so clever as to conceive out of their own heads and design and complete the weapon system at one go-off although they have never seen it, and they have performed a great work.

What made him happy today is that a contingent of young and promising talents who will shoulder upon the rapid development of the Juche-oriented defence industry grow in the course of the development of the new weapon, he noted, saying with pride that they are precious treasure and wealth of the country which cannot be bartered for anything and the Juche-oriented defence industry will steadily be developed by the talented national defence scientists and technicians faithful to the Party.

Each Juche weapon developed and completed by us reflects the greatness of the Workers’ Party of Korea which provided powerful war deterrent capable of firmly defending Korean-style socialism with the responsibility for the destiny and future of the country and the people and the noble loyalty of our national defence scientists who have unsparingly devoted their blood and sweats of patriotism true to the leadership of the Party, he said.

Saying August 24 is, indeed, an unforgettable good day, and that today three years ago we succeeded even in a few strategic submarine underwater ballistic missile test-fires which the world has ever seen, he together with his dear comrades-in-arms recollected the unforgettable days when he developed and completed strategic weapons braving manifold trials.

An important mission our defense industry takes up is to contribute to increasing national defence capabilities in every way so as to safeguard the Party, revolution, country and people, guarantee the final victory of the revolution and lead and promote the building of a powerful socialist nation, he said, underscoring the need to push ahead with an indomitable offensive campaign to put our strength onto the level desired by us to continue to step up the development of Korean-style strategic and tactical weapons for resolutely frustrating the ever-mounting military threats and pressure offensive of the hostile forces.