Straight Line of the Day: Overheard During Obama’s Meeting With the Pope…

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Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

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  1. … “you mean Anonymiss’ cookies only taste sinful? (Not that anyone remembers what they taste like anymore…)”

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  2. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    Mr President, I serve Jesus Christ. I know Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is a friend of mine. Mr. President, you’re not Jesus Christ.

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  3. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    No Mr. President, I only get high on the Lord.

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  4. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    Why no Mr. President, I don’t KNOW how the dog is around these parts.

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  5. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    Biden! Take the Pope’s hat off right this minute!

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  6. …a voice from on high, saying “This man who thinks he is ‘The One’, do not listen to him…”

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  7. …Yes really, Barraco Barner, there is more to the Bible than just the sermon on the mount.

    …Et tu Brute?

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  8. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    Even if you spell it O’Bama I can’t make you an Irish Saint.

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  9. … “no, I really don’t have any authority over the Louisville Cardinals; your brackets are on their own.”

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  10. …you’ll have to forgive Mr. Biden’s absence, he thought he was supposed to meet the poop.

    …well jeez, we still haven’t re-sanctified this place after that hell’s spawn Pelosi slithered out of here.

    …nothing, by Obama, just in case.

    …a bit of a ruckus in the wine cellar during the ritual Secret Service security sweep and guzzle.

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  11. Sorry, Francis but I have a pen and a phone. The constitution’s built in restraining order means you can’t touch me, but I can do whatever I want to you.

    Sorry Barack, but I have on good authority that my 10 commandments trump your 27 amendments.

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  12. …as they walked the square, they came upon a little Italian boy who had spilled his lunch and was crying.

    Obama asked, “What’s wrong, little boy?”

    “Cheese an’ crackers got all muddy!”

    And a surprised Pope said, “You shouldn’t blaspheme like that, my son.”

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  13. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    Have you ever tried that loaves and fishes trick? I got my stash right here.

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  14. …Dang, Popester, you’re NOT German? I had this cool greeting in Austrian all practiced. Hey, Frankie, dude, do ya like Al Green?

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  15. Overheard During Obama’s Meeting With the Pope…

    Obama: “Stop sprinkling holy water on me! It burns!”

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  16. “Stephanopoulos told me my Muslim faith is really my Christian faith. Does that qualify me for some sort of transubstantiation award or something?”

    “So what’s the deal with the Easter Bunny? Or don’t you delve deeply into theology like I do?”

    “That water into wine story’s OK, but wait’ll I tell you about turning a penalty into a tax!”

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  17. Papal Translator: (whispering) Holy Father, this dark, unchurched one asks if he could play “Carmina Burana” on the organ with the Basilica choir because, it happens to be, and I quote, “one of his favorite jams”.

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  18. Overheard during Obama’s meeting with the Pope…

    …”the Power of Christ compells you!”

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  19. ” Hey, Francis, you know a place where a dude could score some pizza and Dago red? I’ve got wicked munchies!”

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  20. Overheard During Obama’s Meeting With the Pope…

    So how much does it cost to cover your Nuns for birth control?

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  21. Pope: “Mr. President, how do YOU spell “schism?”

    Obama: “s c h i s e m”

    Pope: “No, Mr. President, in this case it’s correct to leave out the extra vowel.”

    Obama: “Umm. Okay. s c h s e m.”

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  22. @45 – Point of order: Obama would’ve dropped the e, because that narcissist would NEVER pass up an opportunity to say “I” 😀

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