Having now passed one million visitors, it’s time for a brand new contest. This time there will be only one round, with the finalists selected from the entrants using a random number generator. And here is what the prizes will be:
A permalink at the top of the my main blogroll, plus a permalink within the randomized blogroll, plus a million dollars, plus a free week long ad on my Blog Ads ad space, plus an IMAO t-shirt, minus a million dollars.
And, people without blogs will be able to enter the contest as well (you can just give your permalink to whomever you want or sell it on EBay).
For the contest, the five finalists will be given a topic and then have 24 hours to each come up with a top ten list. There will be blind vote (not knowing who wrote which) on the six different top ten lists for which one is the funniest.
Wait… did I say six? But there are only five finalists, you say.
That’s because the name of the game is…
WIN FRANK J.’s FUNNY!
You will have to compete against me, the funniest man alive, to win the top prize. If I win (and I will), I then get to gloat about what a humor god I am and further add to my Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Whoever comes in second place gets a week free on my Blog Ads as a consolation prize.
So, do you think you are man and/or woman enough to take me on? Then e-mail me with the topic “IMAO CONTEST” with the name you like to go by and blog URL if you have one. You have 72 hours from the time of this post to enter. I will then randomly select four or five finalists (Harvey of Bad Money gets a finalist slot if he want one for being the First Loser of the first Super Lucky Happy Fun Permalink Contest Number One™) and announce them Monday. I haven’t determined the timetable for the rest yet, but Emperor Misha I has agreed to come up with the top ten list topic and post it on his site when it comes time so I won’t have an advantage on anyone (other than me being the greatest humor genius that ever lived).
BTW, don’t bother entering because you have no chance of winning. Muh ha ha ha!
Anyone already on my main blogroll (that’s the one under the Imperial Secretary of War seal and before the “Compatriots in the Great Blog War”) is ineligible to enter, as are the immediate family of employees of IMAO (that means you, Silly Sister Sarah and Joe foo’ the Marine). Void where prohibited, whatever in God’s name that means.
SECOND POST! errr, umm. wait.
Dang. I was gonna enter, until he said “don’t bother “.
Oh well, there are other ways to not win a mllion.
Sorry Sarah, I did not know you were Frank’s sister. Poor martyre you might have be anyway.
You used to be funny and cool, now you are boring and you suck. You can keep your permalink.
There’s a fine line between being funny and cool and being boring and sucking, and I ride that line daily.
Can I have a pony instead?
No! Be happy with your permalink!
How about a puppy?
one question: why is your family illegible?
You ride ? That must be pretty damn funny considering that you’re dumpy balance on one foot and an other. Don’t have you ever fallen ?
jb,
Looks like someone has broken the first and second rules of IMAO Club.
First rule of IMAO Club: Only point out corrections through e-mail.
Second rule of IMAO Club: ONLY POINT OUT CORRECTIONS THROUGH E-MAIL!
I meant bumpy balancy of course, not dummy.
BAH! I am too busy watching The Longest Day to be funnier than you. Which I could be, any day of the week (except Thursday…crappy day for me..don’t know why) if I wanted to.
Did you know there were French actors in this film? They actually kick butt. Who knew?
Sorry Frank, I entered even though you told me not to.
Well, what the heck, I’ve faced worst odds.
Never successfully, though. Hmm.
What if I enter and come up with a Top Eleven accidentally? Do I get extra credit?
my quest is to be even less coherent than Amphitryon
Monster, I don’t pretend to be incoherent, but I don’t expect either anyone to be more incoherent than me.
Top that Monster Kabasue.
I’ll try.
Teacher, can I mambo dogface to the banana patch?
“So, do you think you are man and/or woman enough to take me on?”
You’ve already won, Frank 🙂
Frank:
I just want a new handgun…a shiny one. My assault rifle chaps in my holster. It isn’t worth it for a link, but I’d try really hard for a handgun!
Hey, I could use a new gun too! One that shoots lasers. And I need it in the next couple of minutes, please, so can I win already?
The best part is the “ALL CAPS” line…that’s great!
Reading this at the tail end of a suitcase’s worth of Busch Beer. You and Misha do not quiver me! Name the topic. I got ten of anything.
(BTW: only girlie men hit “preview.”
damnit, that was an honest question. i was only looking for someone else with such piss-poor handwriting that it is mistaken for a new form of hieroglyphics to be my soul mate.
way to crush dreams, frank.
Frank’s Funny Contest
I confess–I cheated. Yep, I read the entries for Frank’s Super Lucky Happy Fun Permalink Contest Number One II. Some of them are pretty funny, Frank! It may be closer than you expect…….