I’ve been hyping up a Halloween podcast for over a week here and elsewhere, but last night I heard the teaser audio. It’s less than 2mins long but gives listeners a taste of the Halloween funny to expect next Monday, October 31. In this teaser, I do the voices for all of the teenagers and the zombie Ward Churchill.
On October 5th I wrote the first draft of a Halloween episode where Laurence Simon (the voice of the talking cat), Nathan, and I enlist the aid of shock rocker Alice Cooper to fight against commie zombies led by an evil professor with questionable Native American heritage. With our real jobs hampering progress, it’s taken a while to translate that script to a sweet hit of audio ecstasy.
One of the first scenes I wrote that you’ll hear in the full Halloween podcast next Monday, is this scene where we stop by a friend’s house that collects working movie props to arm ourselves against the commie zombie horde:
Nathan: “Hey, Is that a real lightsaber?”
(SFX OF LIGHTSABER NOISE)
The Cat: “It’s amazing what you can buy on eBay”
Scott: “That thing goes through batteries faster than Kate Moss goes through a line of cocaine. Take the Highlander sword instead”
Nathan: “What are you getting?”
Scott: “Ahnuld’s double-barrelled shotgun from T2”
(SOUND OF SHOTGUN LOADING)
Nathan: “Why do you get to have a gun and I have a sword?”
Scott: “What’s wrong with the sword?”
Nathan: “Well, I’ve never used a sword. What if I swing it around and accidentally cut your head off?”
Scott: “Okay, that would be bad. So, do you want the shotgun?”
Nathan: “Yeah, sure.”
(SOUND OF GUN AND SWORD HANDLING)
The Cat: “You’re gonna give him the shotgun?”
Scott: “Now what?”
The Cat: “He’s never used a gun either. He could accidentally shoot you in the head… or worse, he could miss”
Scott: “Okay, how ’bout I take the sword and the shotty and let Nathan swing you by your the tail like a fluffy white flail?”
(SFX OF CRICKETS AND WIND BLOWING IN THE DISTANCE)
The Cat: “Your mom.”
I’ll let you know when the full Pure Idiom Halloween podcast is available for download.
Lightsaber?
FINALLY – WEAPONS OF MASS DISTRUCTION!
Too bad the lightsaber uses too many batteries. Aw, we coulda used a joke where George Lucas could partner with the people that make those flashlights I see commercials for all the time on Fox News Channel. The ones where you you shake it a couple of times and you don’t need batteries? Can’t you just imagine how that would sound?
Thats hilarious but I like your point of view.