Ladies and Gentlemen, there is too much division in this country.
Why?
My guess is that we are all too hypersenstive and we take things way too seriously. For example, some protestors recently raised some tempers when they set a soldier on fire – in effigy of course. I mean, if they tried to set a real Marine on fire, you’d see a bunch of dead lefties with bits of granola splattered everywhere.
But I ask you: Is it possible to Support The Troops yet still voice your disapproval at something? Like the protestors shown below?
Of course it is. You can disagree with something yet still express your true feelings.
We at IMAO would like to lend our support to the following causes
John Edwards has a wife battling cancer. And we’ve heard rumors that he’s running for president. John, we SUPPORT you!
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Sean Penn: You’ve been opening your mouth again without using an approved script. Once again, you’ve got class coming out all orifices. Sean – We Support you!
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Rosie. Our love for you and your humor is exceeded only by our love for showing you our support! We support you! If you ever start being funny, we hope you never stop.
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We at IMAO also love children. If you’re a child and you are reading this, please know that IMAO supports you!
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Sure, some activists want the baby polar bears to die. Goodness, people! They’re baby polar bears, not baby seals. Why should they die? Baby Polar Bears, we SUPPORT you!
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I felt the need to express my views.
Thank you for your support. Your support means everything to me. Hey, what’s with the matches?
I can’t believe you support polar bear.
By those lights, I could support smelly hippies and DemoCRAPS of all varieties.
IMAO is not afraid to cause controversy.
My official Polar Bear stance will not be changed by your or your intimidation tactics, Spacemonkey.
We also support your choices, provided you burn them for real after a proper lashing with barbed wire. We do have the following notes of caution, however:
Any flame near Edwards’ hair would cause a flash fire tantamount to an explosion. We would suggest you light him from a distance with a flame-thrower. Slowly. From the feet up.
Sean Penn is full of highly flammable methane, and is known to pack a shotgun. Several crossbow bolts coated with rat-poison fired from a safe distance should both disable him and vent enough gas to make him safe to string up. They should also quiet him down just a bit and make the job a bit more tolerable.
Rosie is inhuman, comprised of moist manure and quite impervious to flame. Try a RPG or a small nuke instead.
Babies and bear cubs don’t burn well in our experience. In the past, we have had some limited success at making an acceptable baby/bear cub bonfire by piling all of them together and dousing the lot of them with gasoline. We find the piling goes much faster if you use a pitchfork.
Good luck.
I even had problems with these black flag idiots back in the days when I considered myself left of center. Spot an anarchist at any demonstration and you won’t have to look but 10 feet to find a Trotskyite, and idiot wearing there Che Guevara T-shirts. The only thing I see change from the 70’s is the guy’s in the Mao hats are gone. I guess the Chinese are no longer cool now that they have a growing economy and aren’t killing millions with idiotic social experiments anymore. I still can’t understand why the democrats let these clowns intermingle with them and even lead their demonstrations.
I don’t see Republicans being led around by activists in KKK and National Socialist uniforms. Where’s the college brats in their Augusto Pinochet T-shirts. Don’t see them. I can understand the pacifists protesting the war but what’s with the violent shock troops at the front? I guess it’s all in the name of inclusiveness.
Funny thing, the last person that was really successful at protest marches was MLK and he didn’t invite the all the violent freaks. It’s a good thing for the civil rights movement that the freak show wouldn’t really get rolling until the end of the sixties. They had a short historical window to get something done before extremists took over.
Polar bears are the DEVIL!
We could burn one of those Che Guevara T-shirts, Neo…you know, show our support the Workers’ Revolution.
We support Mao! Really!
One of the things I always enjoyed in my youth was watching a bunch of loud. foulmouthed, hygiene challenged lunatics get hosed down by the fire department. Is it against the rules to do that today? I’m thinking that starting a fire out in the street or in a public park is against some kind of law or ordinance. A good wetting down would be just what the doctor ordered.
Maybe they’d all catch cold and have to crawl back under the rock they live under and spend a couple of days in bed watching the View. Wait, could that be filed under cruel and inhuman punishment? Mawhhahahahhah.
Hippies are smelly because they’re trying to be french.
Granola splattered everywhere? rofl!
I smell singed tail feathers.
Lighting fire to Rosie O’Dumbell? Scarry…with all that blubber, I doubt that fire would ever go out…maybe that could be harnesed for energy? On second thought, that would be ecologically unsound.
Sean Pinhead? He’s so full of noxious gasses, he’s go up instantly like a MOAB.
I hear there was even a smelly hippie in the crowd that even pulled down his pants in front of God, women and children, and deficated on the flag. Oh, yeah, these people are a class bunch. Why can’t I ever be lucky enough to be driving by a scene like that? Headline: Dozens of protesters hospitalized; crazy injun / redneck halfbreed accused of shooting deficating protester in the buttocks with two barrel loads of salt rock, then blugening bystanders with the butt of his shotgun.
Basilisk,
I kind of like the idea.
Don’t know if anyone’s ever burned an effigy of a deadbeat hippy or radical student activist. Sounds like a decent podcast project for the IMAO folks. Hint! Hint! Dress the effigy up in black like an anarchist, put Che Guevara on one side and a big pot leaf on the other. Burn a black anarchist flag, a Yippie flag, and a flag with hammer and sickle.
Come on folks, there’s got to be someone out there with the time, the talent, and the ambition.
Some nice slogans would do too:
“Keep American Beautiful Fumigate A Hippie”
“Grillin’ with Che Guevara”
“Clean Up Campus, Get A Dropout A Job”
“Bound For Rehab”
“Have You Kicked An Anarchist Yet Today”
“Sophomores Should Shut Up And Learn Something About Society Before Trying To Change Everything”
“We Know You’re Too Stupid To Be A Real Commie”
“The Proletariat Thinks You’re Full Of Shit”
If someone does decide do it don’t dress up like a bunch of freaks, normal work clothes will do.
This makes me so mad, i want to PUKE!!
How about AL BORE and his Glowball Warming?
Na, No need to light up Al Gore.
We’re still waiting for Al to spontaneously combust.