I like America. It’s a neat country. We have lots of cool things here like mountains and water parks and nachos. And you don’t have lots of mean people pushing you around like in a lot of other countries. As a Christian, I especially appreciate how we don’t get hunted down and killed; Christianity did thrive even with the getting hunted down and killed, but I think it works better without it.
So nice country with neat stuff and no mean people pushing us around and we don’t get killed for our beliefs.
Problem is we leave the governing to politicians who are incompetent but think they’re smart. That’s a bad combination. They want more power to push everybody around when really we just gave them jobs none of us felt like doing because we’re too busy working on important useful stuff. Who here has time for a political campaign? Most politicians just get to vote yes or no on stuff, which shouldn’t be that hard of a job. We tell them, “Vote yes on the good stuff and no on the bad stuff… and leave us alone because we’re busy and have work to do.” It seems simple, so I don’t know where they get the ego from. You’re not better than us, you work for us. Like if I owned a McDonald’s and one of the employees called me an “evil-monger,” that would not do well for his performance review. And if he was very old, it might be time for him to retire.
I think a lot of countries don’t get America. They just have different attitudes. It’s like they’re used to thieves who break into their house all the time and steal all their stuff, so they’re so happy when they find a thief who at least returns their TV. On other hand, we would beat up that thief and set him on fire because YOU DON’T TOUCH OUR STUFF! We have what they call “self-esteem,” which means we like ourselves and think we can do very well for ourselves if others don’t interfere.
So what’s my point? I have no idea. I wouldn’t mind if the government was full of dumb people saying lots of dumb, mean things about us as long as they don’t have any actual power to make us do any of their foolish idea. People have thought that for a long time, though. It’s a neat idea, but when people see power, they grab for it. Especially useless people who think they need it to feel better about themselves.
Anyway, maybe Congress would try to push us around less if we got them some more hobbies or something.
Anytime a congressperson comes up with an idea, we should say, “yeah, we could do that. ……orrrrr, you could go on vacation for a month. Anywhere you want to go, its on us. Yeah, we thought you’d like that idea. Go on, then, have a nice time.” It’d be cheaper and quieter for the rest of us.
Many states have their legislatures in session for only a short period of time. We should do that: have Congress meet in January for, say, 90 days. If they can’t do anything in those 90 days, we probably didn’t need it done anyway. If something important came along, like a bunch of crazies fly planes into buildings or they revamp the BCS again, then the president can call them into session.
Oh, and since it’s a part-time job, they wouldn’t need all that staff. Or a full-time paycheck. Pay them minimum wage while they’re actually in session (make them clock in). Oh and pass my proposed 28th Amendment, which would require Congressmen to be present for a full reading of all bills on which they vote.
We could give them all something that rattles and lights up to amuse themselves with. Then when something important comes up. The return home to be told either to say yes or no. Other than that they get to talk a lot, but not touch our stuff.
Basil: loving the 28th Amendment!
I’m sure there are tons of people like me (and all of you) who could do a great job in congress, but don’t have the time, wealth of connections to run for office. Kind of sucks that the process eliminates great minds like ours.
Ah, Congress. A truculent, poor civil servant with designs of being a fearful Master.
If they ask us to go through the canard every two years of voting, then I say we just regulalrly vote the bums out. Anyone who wants to be in Congress should automatically be disqualified from running for office.
Damn! Not an original thought to this post…but I still like it. I have spoken.
Burp!
Amen to Brother Basil’s proposals. Hobbies for CongressCritters: 1) Thumb Twiddling 2) Breath Holding 3) Spitting into the wind 4) Synchronized Goose-Stepping 5) Long walks on short piers 6) Hide-and-no-seek 7) Tic-Tac-Toe 8) Golf 9) Soccer 10) Memorizing the Constitution
I think it’s time to dissolve the US. It was a neat idea but it didn’t turn out to be all it was cracked up to be. Separate states would be better than this.
Or just whack the parts that are specifically forbidden by the instruction manual. That would be better too.
Politicians like lawyers, are entrepreneurs. Where else do you see entrepreneurs. Oh right, in the market. This is where the devil has an upper hand to some sort. The reason we elect wealthy people to government is because they already get their wealth from the market, not from their jobs in the gubmint. Therefore they can devote their brainpower to governance. At least that’s how a Republic is supposed to run.
People who get into gubmint in order to create their wealth are parasites. Any career pols or RINOs come to mind?
One way to do it is to write a constitution that says they only get limited power. Things like powers not given to congress are for the states and the people. But this only works if they are at least smart enough to read the rules, which doesn’t seem to be the case right now.
I thought “evil” was one of those simple minded words we’d now outgrown. Remember all the rolling eyes at phrases like “axis of evil” and “evil-doers”? Admittedly I’m not smart like the Democrats but I don’t think the evil protesters ever killed anybody, unlike non-evil terrorists who need to be taken in our lap and asked “awww, what’s the matter, lil buddy?” Clearly Harry Reid needs to apologize for his very existance and start an dialogue with Pelosi and Obama about the root causes of “why do they hate us”.
Personally, I like being an Evil Monger™. It sounds like a video game boss. Who carries, like, this big club with spikes sticking out of it. And goes “roaaaaaarrrr” every six seconds.
The American populace needs better hobbies: http://www.recombinantrecords.nt/docs/2009-05-Amusing-Ourselves-to-Death.html
I say, in the next election we start a petion to get the “Inadament Carbon Rod” on the Ballot.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Space_Homer
http://www.teufelstomb.com/reviews/brutaltruth-evolutionthroughrevolution/