“The exercise of one’s vote is like a punch to a liberal’s dumb monkey face.” -Thomas Jefferson
“We once handled tyrants with a musket to the junk, but now we vote them out of office. I prefer the former, but the latter will do.” -George Washington
“Every time a conservative votes, God kills a hippie.” -Ronald Reagan
“It wasn’t God. I’m the one killing the hippies.” -Fred Thompson
Today is the day. Obama was all like, “I can do what I want! None of the dumb stoopids can stop me!” And then he looked at calendar and was like, “What? What is this day? I do not like this day! This is bad!” And then he curled up in the corner and put his security bucket over his head. For it is Election Day, the day we formerly respond to Obama’s and the Democrats’ job performance. It is a time to “punish our enemies,” and Obama foolishly made himself the enemy of the American people.
First off, remember to go out and vote. This is important thing number one.
Second, there is no second. Voting is only important thing.
Later we can watch the fun tonight. Tonight would be a very good night to get over Twitter-phobia and follow me there as I’ll probably be hanging out there a lot, but I’ll also put up some updates on the blog as things happen. Also, a great place to follow results will be Nate Silver’s blog at the NYTimes — probably the best thing ever to come out of the NYTimes. I know he’s supposed to be a lefty, but you really can’t tell from his blogging — just straight facts. Anyway, he has a good model to tell how things are going as soon as the earliest results come in.
And the most important thing is to have fun.
…No, wait; the most important thing is Obama not have fun. In fact, we want him to vomit in sadness. And Pelosi to have some sort of mental break. And Reid… well who care about Reid because he’ll be leaving office.
So vote and hope for good things! Be honorable, ronin.
So which do you want?
Should we have fun or read Twitter?
So, why on the eve of a Republican landslide would I want to go ghey and do the Twitter? I don’t think so! Just because we are going to ram it up the Democrats behinds doesn’t mean I have to become a rammer!
Some large men with tazers should keep an eye on Pelosi in case she does snap, she looks like a biter and I don’t want any innocents turning into undead Pelosi-human hybrids.
Now that I voted this morning I am wondering if I have done enough. I think I should give rides to democrats to polling places. Of course by polling places, I mean I take them to a strip club, then drop them off their, and tell them to celebrate last nights democrat victory.
I believe that “formerly” = “formally” in the post. Just sayin’.
I voted last week -straight Republican ticket. Not that it makes much difference in my deep-red neck of Texas.
Yeah, about that Twitter thing, Frank. How about hanging out here so we non-Twits can comment?
Um, let’s see, some other bloggers are doing something called “L I V E – B L O G G I N G.” Spell it with me, Frank.
“There was a time not so long ago when justice was a bullet. Now we use voting booths. God I miss the smell of gunpowder.” -John Wayne
“Believing with you that punching hippies is a matter which lies solely between Man & hippies, that he owes account to none other for his punching, that the legitimate powers of government reach actions only, & not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that hippies must be punched,” thus building a wall of separation between hippie punching & State.” – Thomas Jefferson
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“I believe your majesty to be a buggerer of small boys and therefore I shall endeavor to not only see that my country defeats you but that we humiliate your sordid land and send your soldiers back to England with brands on their buttocks stating that they are fighting for teh ghey”! John Adams
When we bring The Great Spirits back from their eternal wandering in The Land Between the Winds for a few hours to vote Da Chicago Way, I hope they will punish Frank for forsaking his readers for a bunch of flamers and Twits. Yes, Chief White Mask, Chief Oil Baron Runs Him, Chief Crazy Heston, Chief John Browning, Chief He Who Wears The Brooks Brothers, Chief Great Steel From Dunfermline, and Chief Duke John will all be very angry.
Is it wrong that I wrote in Chris Christie for board of education here in Wayne County? My only other option was an unaposed Dhimmicrat
Missed a quote:
“To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.”
–Conan
“Honor comes not in defeating evil, but in taking up arms against it and b!tch-slapping pansy-@ss liberals back to their mothers’ basements”
~Old Norse Proverb
I’d write in FrnakJ if I were you RL.
He’s much scarier than Chris Christie and he goes better with the “raving” part of being a lunatic.
“Give me liberty, or let me punch hippes” ~ Patrick Henry
“I think, therefore I am…not a liberal” ~Rene Descartes
I wrote myself in for watershed commissioner (nobody else running) Is that bad?
I wrote in my neighbor for Soil and Water Conservation District Commissioner (no one running). That position sounds made up, so I think just about anyone could do it.
like the liberals say – vote early, vote often!
“Voting is like marriage. It doesn’t matter who you pick, it’s going to end badly.”
– Al Bundy –
Voters to liberals; “… to the last I grapple with thee; from hell’s heart I stab at thee; for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee.”
Captain Ahab says go vote!
@Jim: It might not turn out so bad for you. Before taking the helm of Prussia and then Europe, Otto von Bismarck was the local commissioner of levies (dykes).
“Second, there is no second. Voting is only important thing.”
Well, there is preventing election fraud. That seems like a good second.
After voting, try to exercise as many rights as possible from the Bill of Rights. Although, maybe skip 4th, 5th, and 6th Amendments – you normally have to commit a felony to invoke them.
After reading the above inspiring quotes, I felt fearless enough to even link to twitter!
Amazing coincidence. Today was put out the trash day in our neighborhood and in congress too.