Michelle Obama has once again reiterated that fat kids are a national security threat. She said, “Fat kids are a threat to our national security. And they’re disgusting and fat! I hate them!”
Michelle Obama upon seeing a fat kid.
It really is time we started to taking the threat of fat kids seriously. Think if there was a terrorist attack and people couldn’t exit a building due to slow moving fat kids in the way. And it’s getting harder and harder to spot suspicious activity when no matter where you look your view is blocked up by fat kids. And how can emergency vehicles respond when they have to constantly dodge all the fat kids slowly waddling across streets?
Thus, the FBI has a new area on their website where you can report fat kids whenever you see them. You can also report kids eating lots of sweets who you suspect of getting fat. Remember what Smokey the Bear says: “Only you can prevent fat kids… though that’s not really my area of expertise.”
I’m just picturing a not-too-distant future with cops on Segways with bullhorns yelling at kids:
“YOU THERE! STEP AWAYYYYYY FROM THE DONUTS!”
Eye Bleach, STAT!!
Totally unrelated to the topic at hand……
Doesn’t she look like that weird salt-monster that was terrorizing the crew on Star Trek?
Those kids aren’t just fat, Frank.
They’re FATTY FATTY FAT FAT kids.
And they all turn into retarded liberals: “libtards.” Who are FAT.
And THAT (with the FAT) is the threat to national security.
I’m with her on this. And we can’t just leave it up to the parents.
She can start by blowing-up her own butt.
Give the fat kids to Gunny Sgt Hartman…he’ll know how to cure them of their fatitude.
PS: Jimmys right…look how Nadler and Grayson turned out.
Can’t you all see what is happening? The Dems are into long range planning! They’re setting the stage to make everyone thing that FAT = NATIONAL RISK for when Chris Christie runs against Barry in 2012. It’s freakin’ obvious!
That’s why Barry wants to close GITMO – so they can turn it into “Michelle’s Fat Camp.”
Fat and Democrat is no way to go through life, son.
When reached for comment Whoopie reminded the first Wookie that these kids aren’t really fat, fat if you know what she means.
In an effort to stop using foreign oil all Fatty McFat Fat’s have been ordered onto Government hamster wheels to produce energy. Once they shed some fat they will be in optimal shape to keep the hamster wheels at an efficient speed.
In related news another national emergency has been discovered. Panda bears are double agents for China and have released all of our national zoo secrets. As a result all zoos must be closed immediately.
Perhaps she’s angry about the bad make up job. I’m not sure who’s doing her makeup but I’m pretty sure eyebrow makeup doesn’t actually go all the way into the eye socket area. That left eye needs a lot of help. So in light of this I think she just saw a mirror and not a fat kid.
@Chip: Doesn’t she look like that weird salt-monster that was terrorizing the crew on Star Trek?
Okay when I get the soda off of my monitor, I will give you a good shunning.
So if fat kids are a security threat, what is michael moore?
AAAAH! That picture of Moochelle always reminds me of the X-Files episode “The Host.” Looks like “Flukeman”
That PICTURE is the national security threat!
I don’t get it. I don’t understand why there’s a picture of June Cleaver with this piece. Oh wait, the pearl necklace confused me there for a second. Never mind….
Omigosh, it’s Michelle’s “Oh-face.” It’s no wonder that President Barry is afraid of her.
Speaking of Michelle, what’s her BMI?
Wookie? no. first Klingon maybe
She reminds me of that episode of Star Trek Voyager when they separated that half Kilngon half human chick. you had the always angry klingon half and the other scared human half running about as 2 separate persons. she would be the klingon half
Y’now, were it not for the fact that you can see Mrs. Brakabama’s ass from outer space, I might take her initiative seriously.
That is so funny Chip. I said that same thing to my brother yesterday when we saw this picture somewhere else.
I read this while eating a cookie.
That was a lie.
I ate three cookies. They were small. Mmmmm….cookies….
It’s too bad they shut down the Whitehouse snitch phone line…..or did they?
National million pound march on Washington DC asap maybe that will shake the white house to pieces
Fat kids are guilty of the unpardonable progressive sin.
They’re enjoying themselves too much, in non-progressively approved ways.
Michelle wants all America’s children to be thin, sad and obedient, just the way she likes them.
Just like berry.
At least the fat kids can lose the fat from their bellies. Michelle Obama will never be able to lose the fat from her head…
Michelle was last seen sporting overgrown fingernails and wearing Kleenex boxes for slippers.
Do NOT under any circumstances let parents make any decisions that affect their children! We are a village that it takes, remember? Fat kids will remain fat and tards will remain tards until the Government takes over and finally fixes everything in our lives…oh wait…
The photo is from her wedding night.
Of course we all know that Larry Mondello and Lumpy Rutherford grew up to be America-hating terrorists.
Or was that a Twilight Zone episode?
Does the government’s shiny new health care plan cover liposuction and belly bands? If not, I see a glaring omission that the dems might want to try and fix. It will probably cost a lot, so they should probably just budget an extra 100 trillion for Healthcare, plus raising taxes.
Michelle putting down fat kids just never stops being funny. One of those hilarious pot vs. kettle situations by the woman with the huge ass. What’s next, will Michael Moore and Rosie O’Donnell join in?