You know about Jetman, right? In case you don’t, Jetman is some Swiss dude names Yves Rossy who wears a jet.
No, this isn’t some silly cartoon character. Or a Robert Downey, Jr. movie about some silly comic book character.
This is a real thing, where the fellow straps on wings and jet engines and flies around.
Jetman is in Wisconsin this week, and was flying around at the AirVenture show in Oshkosh. He flew around next to a B-17, and had some other stuff scheduled. Sounds like fun.
[Direct link: CBS]
What use can we make of this technology?
Well, it could be a James Bond thing. Or could have been. I could see Sean Connery’s James Bond doing this; he wore that Jetpack in Thunderball. I can see Roger Moore’s James Bond doing this; he flew that little Mr. Bean-looking jet in Octopussy. Maybe even Pierce Brosnan’s Bond. Not so sure about that new guy, though. Is this the kind of thing Daniel Craig’s James Bond would do? I don’t know. He just doesn’t strike me as a throw-on-a-jet kind of fellow. Maybe I’m wrong.
So, if not a James Bond gadget, what good is it?
Well, if we put laser beams or rocket launchers on it, we could use it to shoot laser beams or launch rockets at things. Other than that, I got nothing.
So, help me out here. What would you do with a Jetman outfit? What use could we make of this technology?
Send one to Joe Biden….hillarity ensues.
Two words: EXTREME QUIDDICH!
High-tech Mexi-Cannon
Mutley, you snickering, floppy eared hound.
When courage is needed, you’re never around.
Those medals you wear on your moth-eaten chest
Should be there for bungling at which you are best.
So, stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Howwww!
Nab him
Jab him
Tab him
Grab him
Stop that pigeon now.
You, silly, stop snickering, it’s not worth the chance.
For you’ll be returned by the seat of your pants.
And clunk, you invent me a thingamabob
That catches that pigeon or I lose my job.
So, stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Stop that pigeon
Howwww!
Nab him
Jab him
Tab him
Grab him
Stop that pigeon now.
So far our efforts have been along the lines of a T-Rex with rocketlaunchers. How about we use this technogoly to modify pterodactyls with jet wings, rocket launchers and lasers. Take our cyber-dino-death machines to the next logical level.
Depending on its capability in thin air . . .
Make a fortune on bets at the Everest base camp.
Do a live version of Rocky and Bullwinkle. Don’t know why you’d want to in the first place, but now you can, anyway.
Impress a pretty little French acrobat and get cirque du soleil’ed.
What would you do with a Jetman outfit?
Find a Jetwoman…
NSA is currently conducting experiments utilizing this technology modified with smart phones and Google Glass. Hillary has requested that an entire squadron be available in 2016. She believes these will be much better than flying monkeys.
Mug skydivers.
Moon “No Fly” zones.
Zero-G jello shots.
Strafe San Francisco, Washington, D.C., New York, and Atlanta (I lived near Atlanta for seventeen months, and hated the experience).
I would use it to commute to work, natch. On Earth Day I would make a pilgrimage to every office of GreenPeace, Earth Watch, Earth First, etc. that I could reach just to blow jet exhaust on all the Chevy Volts in their parking lots.
Pizza delivery?
Is it lunchtime yet?
Drone hearder