Being an adult is being able to say, "You know what? I've looked at enough Google pics of monkeys in hats today. There's a tomorrow."
— Jason Miller (@longwall26) July 29, 2013
If you're going to a heckle a puppet show you have to do it with your own puppet
— sweaty five dollars (@iscoff) July 29, 2013
A good way to see if you can trust your barber is to tattoo a treasure map under your hair and see if they tell you about it during the cut.
— Matt Roller (@rolldiggity) July 29, 2013
I don't believe the 1st amendment should protect a reality contestant's right to describe their experience as "a journey."
— Danny Zuker (@DannyZuker) July 29, 2013
Old Wisdom: @MSNBC is pandering to the @dailykos audience New Reality: @msnbc is embarrassing the @dailykos audience
— DepressiveBlogger69 (@AceofSpadesHQ) July 29, 2013
The children of Sudan would be so glad to hear that you only purchase locally farmed dog food.
— Fun_Beard (@Fun_Beard) July 29, 2013
The 1st Amendment definitely should not protect a reality contestant’s right to declare that he or she did not go there to lose.