“Mr. Walrus! Where have you been?”
“Lounging in the pool and drinking.”
“And that is why you are late?”
“I did say I was drinking, right?”
Winner
This week
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Archive of entries posted on August 2025
Straight Line of the Day: Unlikely Headlines: …
Welcome to IMAO! Our IT Department Is Hard at Work Trying To Figure Out Why We’re Always Crashing
Friday Night Open Thread: Life’s Little Coincidences
Straight Line of the Day: Being Really Rich Means…
Bond Girlathon Friday : Results for 8/8/2025 : New Matches for 8/15/2025
Hi guys. I’m out of semi retirement to host this week’s Bond Girlathon. I hope you are all doing well.
Results
| Denise Richards | No Preference | Maryse Guy Mitsuoko |
|---|---|---|
| 120 | 0 | 52 |
| Halle Berry | No Preference | Mie Hama |
|---|---|---|
| 145 | 2 | 40 |
Matches for 8/15/2025
Match 1
Akiko Wakabayashi (Aki) vs Serena Scott Thomas (Dr. Molly Warmflash)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Akiko Wakabayashi | 0 – 2 – 0 | 80 – 2 – 257 |
Actress: Akiko Wakabayashi Nationality: Japanese Bond Movie: You Only Live Twice (1967) Synopsis:
Aki was a senior agent of the Japanese secret service, working directly under its leader Tiger Tanaka. She was confident and independent, and tricked Bond into walking over a trap door, which catapulted him down a steel slide leading to Tanaka’s office. She drove a Toyota 2000GT and saved Bond’s life on many occasions. Mid way though the film, an assassin tried to poison Bond, but Aki was poisoned by mistake.
VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Serena Scott Thomas | 0 – 2 – 0 | 140 – 9 – 298 |
Actress: Serena Scott Thomas Nationality: English Bond Movie: The World is Not Enough (1999) Synopsis:
Molly Warmflash was the chief medical officer at MI6. Bond had to visit her to be cleared for duty after an explosion dislocated his collar bone. Although not technically fit, Bond seduced Molly, who agreed to clear him so long as he called her this time. Moneypenny read off the report, which mentioned that Bond had “exceptional stamina.”
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Match 2
Tsai Chin (Ling) vs Sophie Marceau (Elektra King)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Tsai Chin | 0 – 2 – 0 | 48 – 3 – 275 |
Actress: Tsai Chin Nationality: Chinese Bond Movie: You Only Live Twice (1967) Synopsis:
In the opening scenes of the film, Bond is shown in bed with Ling, as the two discuss why Chinese girls taste different from all other girls. Ling gets up and presses a button that rockets the bed upwards into the wall, and two gunmen enter the room to kill Bond. It is later revealed to the audience that Ling was helping to stage Bond’s death in order to keep his enemies off his back.
VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Sophie Marceau | 2 – 0 – 0 | 284 – 2 – 205 |
Actress: Sophie Marceau Nationality: French Bond Movie: The World is Not Enough (1999) Synopsis:
Elektra King was the daughter of Sir Robert King, a wealthy oil baron. When Elektra was kidnapped by villain Renard, M persuaded Sir Robert not to pay the ransom. Elektra developed Stockholm syndrome because of this, feeling sympathy for Renard and resenting her father. She killed her father and planned to destroy Istanbul in a nuclear explosion so that her inherited oil pipeline would have a monopoly.
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Coffee Badger Don’t Care
Return-to-office rebellion sparks wild office behavior as Wall Street and Amazon demand workers show up
Daily Mail | 8 August 2025 | Alice Wright… The most popular trend du jour, driven largely by millennials, is ‘coffee badging’. It involves showing up at the office just long enough to grab a coffee, greet the right people, and then quietly leave to finish the day working remotely.
“Hey, Steve, working remotely or remotely working? Heh heh.”
Three-quarters of companies say they are struggling with employees coffee badging, a recent report found.
Spokesmen for the other quarter could not be found.
At Samsung, the practice got so out of hand that its US semiconductor division has rolled out a return-to-office monitoring tool, Business Insider reported earlier this week.
A “return-to-office monitoring tool.” Gee, what could that possibly be?
Assuming, of course, that the supervisor has shown up for work to do headcount.
Swiped Off the Internet: Feel-Good Walk Down Memory Lane
Straight Line of the Day: The Biggest Surprise From the Trump-Putin Meeting in Alaska: …
Cartoons and Memes : Winners Match
Those Rules, They Keep On a-Shifting
Apparently, it is now unhip and totally square to know that it’s hip to be square.
Similacly, the Sixties generation found out that the diapers, they need a-changin’.
And as property owners, they realized there need to be signs, signs, everywhere signs.
And the House of the Rising Son would really be a nice change of pace.
Swiped Off the Internet: Me at Business Mixer With Interns
Straight Line of the Day: Caveman Rules: …
Bond Girlathon Wednesday : Results for 8/6/2025 : New Matches for 8/13/2026
My oh my, how the Summer is rolling by.
Results
| Carmen du Sautoy | No Preference | Grace Jones |
|---|---|---|
| 158 | 7 | 21 |
| Mary Stovin | No Preference | Francoise Therry |
|---|---|---|
| 161 | 3 | 34 |
New Matches for 8/13/2025
Match 1
Barbara Bach (Anya Amasova) vs Fiona Fullerton (Pola Ivanova)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Barbara Bach | 4 – 0 – 0 | 847 – 3 – 130 |
Actress: Barbara Bach Nationality: American Bond Movie: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) Synopsis:
Anya Amasova, code name ‘Triple X’, was a KGB agent working under General Gogol. She had the same mission as Bond, to retrieve stolen microfilms for a submarine tracking system. After half co-operating and half getting in the way of each other, Bond and Amasova meet their bosses at the Egyptian HQ, who tell them that MI6 and the KGB are now co-operating, and the two should work together.
VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Score |
|---|---|---|
| Fiona Fullerton | 2 – 2 – 0 | 510 – 10 – 425 |
Actress: Fiona Fullerton Nationality: Nigerian Bond Movie: A View To a Kill (1985) Synopsis:
Pola Ivanova was a KGB agent working for General Gogol. She recorded incriminating evidence of Max Zorin, and escaped with a tape of it. Bond had followed her, and a struggle ensued, until they both realized that they knew one another from a prior mission. They went to a spa and spent the evening in a hot tub together. While Bond took a shower, Pola snook out with the tape, only to realize later that Bond had switched it for a fake.
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Match 2
Sue Vanner (Log Cabin Girl) vs Maryam d’Abo (Kara Milovy)
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Sue Vanner | 2 – 2 – 0 | 475 – 6 – 428 |
Actress: Sue Vanner Nationality: English Bond Movie: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) Synopsis:
The log cabin girl, played by Sue Vanner, was a KGB agent, and a lover of James Bond. While Bond and the girl were curled up under some furs on the floor of an isolated log cabin, M sent a message to Bond’s wrist watch that he was needed at once at HQ. As Bond got up to leave, the girl said “But James, I need you.”, to which Bond replied “So does England.” After he left, the girl radioed to KGB henchmen that Bond had left.
VS
| Contestant | Record | Total Scores |
|---|---|---|
| Maryam d’Abo | 3 – 1 – 0 | 474 – 3 – 421 |
Actress: Maryam d’Abo Nationality: Dutch Bond Movie: The Living Daylights (1987) Synopsis:
Kara Milovy was the girlfriend of Georgi Koskov, a traitor playing both sides in the cold war. Koskov pretended to defect to the West, and got Milovy to shoot blanks at him to make it look more real. He knew that she would be assassinated by Bond, who was assigned to protect Koskov. However, Bond noticed she wasn’t a professional, and he didn’t kill her. When Koskov was discovered to be a traitor, Bond met Milovy posing as a friend of Koskovs. He gained her trust and revealed his identity, gaining a brave ally for his mission.
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