I’ve gone ahead and read the Benghazi investigation so you don’t have to, and the Executive Summary doesn’t really reflect some interesting findings couched in the body of the report. Here are a few surprises from the report you probably haven’t heard about from the media:

• The video that caused the spontaneous protest was actually An Inconvenient Truth.
• The biggest reason the White House/media couldn’t get the proper narrative out was the fact that Ambassador Stevens wasn’t an African American killed by a racist.
• The primary cause of the intelligence failure was the severe lack of leadership in the administration who possessed any intelligence.
• Obama mistakenly directed his drone response to Benghazi Road in Auckland New Zealand. He blamed the autofill feature of Google Maps.
• During the entire duration of the incident, Obama thought he was just participating in his staff’s biweekly Call of Duty tournament. Unless he is lying, he came in eighth place, a personal best.
• Obama was unable to deal with the situation in real time because he needed a good night’s sleep. He had a 6:30 tee time before his fundraiser.
• What irked Obama most about the attack was that he had to leave his September 11 party early to deal with it.
• In a backroom deal, Hillary agreed to receive payola from Morrissey and Johnny Marr each time she said “What difference does it make” during the Congressional hearings.  She would have also received payment for referring to either Obama or Stevens as “The Boy With the Thorn in his Side” or simply saying that “Some Girls are Bigger than Others.”
• After the third recess during her testimony before the Congressional hearings, Hillary Clinton was capably played by her stunt double, Ginger the trained orangutan.
• Ambassador Stevens’ requests for additional security were largely ignored because State Department personnel were pretty sure there were no terrorists in Lebanon, New Hampshire named Ben Ghazi.
• For some reason the report contained a list of names, addresses, social security numbers, bank account numbers and 1040s for all known Tea Party members.