Some people seem to believe that Bush is Hitler, and I think that is wrong. Seems to me it’s time for an enlightening essay.
WHY BUSH IS PROBABLY NOT HITLER
by Frank J.
While it is very hard if not impossible to prove a negative, i.e. Bush not being Hitler, I will do my best because I believe that he is in fact not Hitler. After doing some research, I found out that Hitler was born in Austria in 1889 and died in Germany in 1945 (coincidentally, the same year WWII ended). George W. Bush, on the other hand, was born in America in 1946 and, to my knowledge, is still alive. That by itself seems to be ample evidence that Bush could in no way be Hitler. But there is even more evidence against Bush being Hitler. Hitler was known for having a mustache and being hatless, while Bush is clean-shaven and wears a cowboy hat. That’s quite a stark contrast. Also, Bush speaks garbled English, while Hitler spoke angry, angry German. Hitler was also known to kill millions of Jews, while Bush has killed no Jews that I know of. It is rumored that he once punched an Episcopalian, though. And, while Hitler liked to kill oppressed ethnic minorities, Bush want to kill terrorists, who are under-oppressed criminals. Furthermore, Bush has deposed evil dictators, while, presumably, Hitler would want to be buddy-buddy with fellow mean people and probably play golf with them. Also, when Bush has invaded a country, he’s established democracy there while Hitler would probably want to do mean evil things to the people and not let them vote. And Hitler starred as a loveable tramp in a number of silent, comedic movies, while Bush has shown little comedic acting ability in his two Barney Christmas movies. Finally, Hitler would kill anyone who spoke out against him while Bush doesn’t kill any of his dissenters despite them really, really asking for it.
So who is Hitler? Anyone ever think that maybe he’s Howard Dean? I don’t know what year Howard Dean was born – as I don’t feel like looking it up – but it could be the same year as Hitler! Notice how both “Howard” and “Hitler” start with an ‘h’. This could be a subtle hint… from Hitler! Also, if you shaved Hitler mustaches, restyled his hair, and made him a lot angrier, don’t you think he’d look a lot like Howard Dean? And I’ve never heard Howard Dean say not to kill millions of Jews. Furthermore, I’d really like to punch Howard Dean supporters just like I’d like to punch the supporters of Hitler, the Nazis. And what did Howard Dean do during the Vietnam war? He went skiing, just like Hitler. Finally, why was Howard Dean against deposing Saddam Hussein? Maybe it was because he was afraid next they’d be after other evil dictators like himself, Hitler.
In conclusion, the evidence shows that it is very unlikely that George W. Bush is Hitler, but there is ample conjecture that Howard Dean is. Please pass this information to people who it might interest like those at Moveon.org and the Democratic Underground. Thank you.
burns a monkey in sacrifice to Frank
It’s your world, I just live in it.
In a Modern History class one time, our lecturer gave us the task of seeing how many Australian politicians we could find that look like well-known Nazis. You’d be amazed how many there are.
I can understand the Whole Hitler = Dean theory, but in terms of occupations I think Dean would be more like Joseph Mangula (?), because they are both doctors and you haven’t heard of any of Dean’s patients living. Also he looks like Jeffery Dahmer, both goofy looking and Dean looks like he has been putting on some weight.
FWIW, it’s Dr. Josef Mengele.
And Howard Dean is more like Stalin. Look at the hair and eyebrows… and the politics.
Heil Bush! one arm salute
Well one thing that I think Hitler and number of other trademarked evil dictators had was paranoia. So far the only thing Bush seems to fear is pissing off Laura and the only thing he seems to hate is the posibility of falling off the wagon and pissing off Laura. Bush’s daughters seem to make him a little nervous but then they make everybody a little nervous. Dean seems to hate not just Bush but everybody around him. I can’t figure out why though since Bush never spent much time in Vermont or New York for that matter. It seems that on paranoia, Dean has it.
Herr Vigilante, sig heil! one FINGER salute
Errr… Mr. Angry-Vigilante-Mad-Person…aren’t all salutes done with one arm? I have never seen a two arm salute. That would be just plan goofy. You would look like you were giving directions to airplanes on where to taxi.
A 2 arm salute makes you French.
Given Godwin’s Law, as invoked in Day-by-Day, does this mean that this thread should have ended long ago?
“there should be limits to freedom.” -GW Bush
thats a good way to get people making Nazi comparisions. Hitler invoked the “Defend our nation” shtick against Poland, too.
despite the fact that Poland wasn’t planning anything, nor had the ability to seriously attack Germany. Which is a bit like Iraq and the US.
leaving his policies out of this, how can ANYONE think that Bush is a competant president?
…also, aren’t Dean and Hitler both short? Bush is fairly tall.
Hello In der Stadt, you must be new here. Have fun.
War is not the Answer. Victory is!
Well, let’s take a look. The economy is roaring back, the job market is looking up and there haven’t been any airliners crashing into tall, crowded office towers lately.
Lybia has given up it’s WMD and support for terror programs, about 50 million people have been liberated from tyranical regimes in the last 28 months. Now the Norks may be changing their tune.
On the minus side Dissent has been crushed in Bush’s America, the evidence of this crushed dissent is all these people getting on national TV stating that their dissent has been crushed.
Considering that a presidency is defined by the policies implemented, how can policies be left out?
Anyone thinking that freedom doesn’t have limits is in dire need of remedial education. The greatest folly of the present day is the refusal to acknowledge the existence of these limitations.
in response to the competency of Bush…the mid term election would have shut my mouth just a little if I were a Democrat. Denial does not change the fact that this country has tasted the fruit of the liberal agenda…highly concentrated fruit from the Dingleberry Tree…Bush has his heart in the right place….now say something funny…
I’m not angry. And…yeah, I guess all salutes are done with one arm, but I put “one arm” in there to clarify I was doing a Nazi-ish salute rather than a military salute.
Aelfheld,
I refuse to acknowledge the existence of limitations on my constitutional rights, and if you do, you need remedial education. Ben Franklin said, “They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.”
Ben Franklin said lots of crap. Now hand over your rights!
Ben Franklin used to get a lot of tail too, so it is assumed he said lots of crap.
We must be careful to distinguish between rights and freedoms. For example, you have the right to free speech and the freedom to blather on about pretty much anything. In contrast you may feel the freedom to go around grabbing people’s butts, however, you do not have the right to do so, or so the judge said.
pout But I wanna be an EVIL STORMTROOPER! I need lessons in how to not hit the broad side of a barn with a laser rifle, after all. How can I be an EVIL STORMTROOPER when my Evil Overlord Master isn’t Hitler?????
Actually, it was de Tocqueville who said, “A man who trades liberty for security deserves neither.”
And I don’t think anyone is talking about limitations of constitutional rights. But limitations to absolute freedom do exist and are enshrined in the constitution. For example, I am not free to take whatever I want, drive on the left in America, shout fire in a crowded movie theater, shout “Republican” at UC-Berkely, etc.
Bob
Ok, what do the limitations on freedom have to do with the Bush/Hitler debate? The only things that can be infringed are our constitutional rights.
and respectfully Bob, unless every quotation book I’ve ever found is wrong it was the esteemed tail-hound Franklin who said that.
Actually you have all the freedom in the world to yell fire in a crowded theater, but if you are wrong or malicious you’ll pay for doing so.
Ben Franklin got a lot of tail?
Like you wouldn’t believe. Most of it was French tail though……
mweh… I chalk that up to his vision… he always was wearing those glasses ya know.
aelfheld, that’s the trick! If you ignore Bush’s success, he’s a failure!
Franklin also said, “Sure, I’ll respect you in the morning!” and “You must be tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all night.”
To “The Vigilante”
Franklin was a big time Woman hunter, and scored offten. He was my role model in High School. BTW it’s not well Know but the father of our country was all so a bit of the skirt chaser, unfortantly he wasn’t as good as the good ol’ Franky as he got him self in trouble once or twice, and it landed hin hot water on at least two occasions. Unlike slick willy he never lied about it, and also I don’t think GW was married at the time eather.
No, I Don’t Think So….
Frank thinks that “some people” are wrong to believe that Bush is Hitler. I hate to point this out like…
It’s truly amazing how the subject can wander so tagentially. But it is certainly more entertaining to discuss old Ben’s womanizing than a lot of this other crap.
Maybe the theme for 2004 can be “Ok folks, a little less focus.”
I heard Ben got it on with Vigilantes momma……
That guy’s gots guts
In der stadt:
How can you question Bush’s competentcy when you spell it “competant”?
Jamie:
Tangentially speaking, I agree. “Less Focus” seems just right. In fact, Howard Dean seems about as less focused as anyone I’ve seen.
Frank J.:
You goofy bastard. Everyone with any sense knows Dr. Dean is Mickey Rooney. Wait, I guess Mickey Rooney is taller. O.K., Dean may be Hitler. So does this mean that Buck can legally bayonet him right between the eyes?
Mikey
Hey, In der Stadt! I like posting quotes without providing context, too.
“The purpose of government is to rein in the rights of the people” — Bill Clinton 1993 on MTV
“We can’t be so fixated on our desire to preserve the rights of ordinary Americans” — Bill Clinton in 1993 from USA Today
You know the one thing that’s wrong with this country? Everyone gets a chance to have their fair say.” — Bill Clinton in 1993, Philadeplphia
Chris D:
You forgot one quote:
“Now I want you to listen to me, I did not have sex with that young woman. It was… Ben Franklin, yeah, that’s it, Ben Franklin did it.”
WHO IS HITLER THEN?
Well, Bush certainly is not. However:Notice how both “Howard” and “Hitler” start with an ‘h’. […] Also, if you shaved Hitler’s mustache, restyled his hair, and made him a lot angrier, don’t you think he’d look a lot like Howard…
My research has revealed that Howard is not Hitler; he’s Lee Harvey Oswald. That’s why Marina Oswald moved to Vermont after Lee “died.” I mean, just look at that face, that smirk, that arrogant condescending devil-may-care evil gleam in his eye.
Case closed.
I found some more Clinton quotes…
Lisa: [gasps] Thank you, Mr. President.
Clinton: No, thank you, Lisa, for teaching kids everywhere a valuable lesson: If things don’t go your way, just keep complaining until your dreams come true.
Marge: That’s a pretty lousy lesson.
Clinton: Hey, I’m a pretty lousy president.
Clinton: I know you don’t think you’re good enough for me. But believe me, you are. Hell, I done it with pigs. [laughs] Real, no-foolin’ pigs!
Marge: Are you sure it’s a federal law that I have to dance with you?
Clinton: You know, I’d change that law if I could, Marge. But, I can’t.
Aide: [whispers in Clintons’ ear]
Clinton: Aw, shoot. Quebec’s got the bomb! Well, I gotta go, but … look, if you’re ever near the White House, there’s a tool shed out back. I’m in there most of the day.
Shoot. I was going to point out the “incompetancy”.
Also, on the subject of limiting freedoms… the complete presence of freedom is called anarchy. It works OK if you’re a wolf, but we thumbed individuals like to prescribe to a limited form of freedom known as ‘government’.
Recap
Here are some things I didn’t talk about over the past week or so: Bush = Hitler Well, duh! Of course Bush = Hitler! It’s so obvious! I mean, just yesterday Senator Lieberman was forced to withdraw from the presidential
You mean he’s not Hitler?
You should read this informative essay I found entitled Why Bush is Probably Not Hitler: While it is very hard if not impossible to prove a negative, i.e. Bush not being Hitler, I will do my best because I believe…
Settle down. compadres.
Without the Bush=Hitler taunt, The Left would be devoid of anything remotely hurtful and vengeful. After all, hurting someone they don’t like makes them feeeeeel something. This is important to The Left, because over the last 20 or so years, The Left has changed their whole paradigm. They have effectively substituted Feeeeeeeeelings for Intellect. When you have no foundation but feeling, you have nothing left but visceral emotions. Raw emotion breeds bad judgment and must be fed like a raging crank habit.
Facts? Forget ’em if they make you feel bad. Make ’em up if they make you feel good. They know that Bush is not remotely like Hitler, but hey… it’s all they’ve got.
>
Oh Frank! I can see it’s going to be a great year. You should go bob-sledding once a month.
“I am Clin-Ton! As overlord, all will kneel before me and obey my brutal commands. End communication!”
“My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball. But tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.”
Don’t blame me; I voted for Kodos.
Like Dean, Hitler was also secretly homosexual
You crazy people have it all wrong:
Howard Dean:
http://www.americandigest.org/mt-archives/000793.html#000793
The Joker:
http://www.dcfanpage.de/dcu/batman/images/joker_new_03.jpg
Wednesday Warp
Yesterday, Frank J. scientifically proves that George Bush is not Hitler. However, he found plausible evidence that someone else could be Hitler… Today, he has another installment of In My World in which you-know-who makes another video tape…no, no…
Wait, Clinton sucked too. I’m not liberal.
that “limit to freedom thing” came during an interview about a website that insulted him.
and yes, how CAN I talk about a state of mind if I mispell it once? I wonder.
in der statdt:
crap, i knew if i got smart-alecky about your spelling, i would screw up any word i used that was over two syllables. and since you aren’t a liberal, never mind.
mikey
Fascinating, compelling, logical analysis…. I am 90% convinced that your thesis is correct.
And don’t forget another undeniable, unassailable fact: Hitler was gay!
Bush is not.
Ask any liberal!
A Penance Proposal…
The Axis of Weasels seems to have started making noises as if they want on America’s good side again. But we Catholics know that forgiveness requires penance. And although it would be satisfying to make Chirac walk to Washington barefoot in the snow an…
You forgot one little thing: Dean is, as we all know, a DEMOCRAT, and they are all, to some extent, Communists.
Hitler was a Fascist, sort of like Rumsfeld.
STRANGE BUT TRUE!
Tuning Spork. Dean can’t be Lee Harvey Oswald. Oswald was a Marine. Dean went skiing.
If I quite remember, the german nazis were of National Socialism Party. It speaks by itself.
It was the German Worker’s Party, changed by Hitler in 1919 into the National Socialist German Workers’ Party.
Bob,
I thought it was that we weren’t permitted to shout “Objective Morality!!” in a crowded Democrat convention hall…
for the record, it’s spelled “incompetency”
what about “unknown”
In the blogosphere, amazing factual opportunities abound!
The blogosphere is great, and the blogosphere is good. There is nothing like it where it comes to the settling of great questions which would otherwise degenerate into endless petty, vindictive debates. There’s quite a debate going on in the…
Look, let’s be fair about this: that was a low blow, Frank. I’m as Republican as they come, but look: you can’t just go around suggesting the opposition is Hitler. You’re BETTER than that, Frank! You’re the guy who came up with RoboPatton! You invented Buck the Marine! You have more CLASS than that. Now go back to calling him Howie; THAT was funny.
I remember a comment that went something like this: “In a Usenet argument, statements will get more and more ridiculous, until somebody will compare you to Hitler, since that’s the worst thing they can think of.”
Which pretty much sums up the Bush=Hitler arguments. The problem is that some of us lived or had parents that lived through that time and really have a clue how evil he truly was in a very emotional way (and as strong as I feel it, it is NOTHING compared to my parents). So it is one thing to disagree with a political position, policy, whatever, but once you have made that comparison, you have demonstrated vast ignorance and are beneath contempt (Unless it is a joke, of course.)
I think calling someone a Jap is the worst possible thing I can think of, seeing as what they did to americans during WWII was far worse than anything Hitler did to the jews, just not nearly as many times. Genocide IS kind of harsh. Don’t get me wrong though, Hitler was still a very evil man.
home depot
hitler my hero u asshholes
The REAL Hitler
Hitler had more personal power than GW Bush. He was an artistic genius in his youth and just wanted to be an artist. The jews he befriended were those that could get his art sold. He was in poverty and lived in hostels. His mother, Klara died of breast cancer. Edward Bloch was a jewish doctor that treated his mother’s cancer. Hitler left Austria and moved to Germany at the age of 24. He fought bravely in world war one. Hitler was gassed and left blind at the end of the war. It was from stress and failure that Hitler contracted schizophrenia, ( he heard voices and had delusions of grandeur.) Basically Hitler went nuts. His illness was ripe at a time of economic and social frustrations. Mentally ill people have a tendency due to chemical imbalances to have special powers. Was Hitler really evil? No. Was he insane? Yes. Was he a psychopath? Yes Had Hitler became an artist the Reich would have never happened. In fact Germany would have become a Communist state. Bush has no personal power except for his blue-blood family lineage and the office of the president. Hitler was a fanatic but in his eyes he was not evil. By History’s standards he was the devil. If anything he was crazy and out of touch with the world. In fact Hitler himself, would have gone to one of his own deathcamps if Heinrich Himmler was in power. Himmler was more evil than Hitler. Himmler’s SS conducted pagan rites and was responsible for the murder of undesirables. But because Hitler lost WWII he was labelled evil. Maybe the true Hitler was a good man but it was his illness that made him evil. In this light..all crazy people are really not evil but victims of their own sick minds. Bush however is not mentally ill. He is just plain stupid. Nor is he a genius Unless Bush stops elections and the Republicans set up a dictatorship, then maybe there is reasdon to worry. Hitlers illness made him evil. Of course if it wasn’t for our country backing the Nazis financially then Hitler couldn’t have built up his military industry and started WWII.