The meaningless prize must be mine!
Yesterday, I was almost a full percentage point ahead of Scrappleface in the Humor category of the 2004 Weblog Awards, but then James Taranto of Best of the Web decided to endorse Scrappleface to spite me, and now I stand 8.5% behind.
All is not lost. You can still vote every day until the 12th, and now I have the backing of Michelle Malkin who loves to defy the Wall Street Journal and got endorsed mentioned by Jonah Goldberg with hardly any coaxing on my part (my first son Jonah J. is sure as hell going to get made fun of at school). So continue to vote and we shall all triumph together.
ENDORSEMENTS:
For the Best of the Top 100 – 250 Blogs category, I’m switching my endorsement – with Harvey’s permission – from Bad Example to Meryl Yourish who has a chance of winning if we all push for her. She is a jooooo, so her winning will help the Zionist Conspiracy.
INDC Journal has my endorsement for Best New Blog.
The Flying Space Monkey has my endorsement for Best of the Top 500 – 1000 Blogs.
Blackfive has my endorsement for Best Military Blog.
Michelle Malkin has my endorsement for Best Media/Journalist Blog against the evil, evil Best of the Web. There is little chance of her winning now, but maybe we can at least rob Best of the Web of having a 50% mandate.
For Best Overall Blog, I now support NRO’s The Corner which has the God among men Jonah Goldberg (whom I have no plans to kidnap the dog of) and America’s favorite curmudgeon, John Derbyshire.
Bribes for more endorsements will still be considered.
UPDATE: That bastard Taranto mentioned Scrappleface and the contest again! He’s taunting me…
UPDATE 2: Despite that limey bastard Taranto’s further meddling, the gap between me and Scrapple face has close by one percentage point since I first posted this. Keep it up, crack smokers ronin!
Sorry, I’ve been voting on multiple computers every 24 hours, and asking my friends to vote for you too! I’m doing my part!
I’m just a third-rate Web columnist, if that, but you have my endorsement. Frank J. rocks!
I think I’m currently winning for “Blog not appearing in this award show.”
Scrappleface may have the Taranto endorsement, but I just got the Taranto paycheck for this. So at least I can buy my precious daughter Janie a present this Christmas. Wait a minute, I’m a virgin. Hey, more $$$ for me!
HEY! You can vote many times a day, just use a different computer each time. I voted 3 times to day, for IMAO, of course. So, every time you see a public computer, be it in a school, library or church, VOTE!!!
Maybe if a certain someone would do a certain joyous dance that was promised before a certain election, we wouldn’t be so confused by the butterfly ballots, thusly voting for Scrappleface time and again.
Yep, a Happy Dance would probably go a loooooong way towards stealing… er, winning this contest.If you need inspiration, just think about an orange John Kerry getting eaten by a mildly hungry Michael Moore, who then chokes to death on Kerry’s absurdly large cranium. Heh. Makes me want to do a little jig just thinking about it.
Nuke the Moon already. Everyone will vote for IMAO then.
Had an Aol problem. What was the problem? I had aol. My dsl will be up tonight but if I’m to blame for you being behind, I’m sorry. Well, not like I killed your G’mom sorry but I feel bad. Not like I owe you somehting bad but I rather you’d be doing better. Not better like…. awe, forget it. I did the best I could.
Taranto and ballroom dancing. And photoshop. Victory will be yours.
Hey, lets all go see if that nice English bloke has posted those Ann Coulter pictures.
You know Frank a person sitting on several Class C’s can do quite a bit…what’s in this for me?
BTW: Glenn has offered me a, tidy sum…
(Thinks to self: Excellent, Instapundit on one side, Frank J. on the other. And me, right in the middle…)
Frank, you have problems. That Son of Risasi must die!!
There are now Ninjas among us.
Frank, you have problems. That Son of Risasi must go…
Frank J was kung-fu fightin’,
That cat was fast as lightnin’..etc etc
Naw Francis,ya know ninja’s pose no problem for Frank. (It’s the zombie ninja monkeys he may have to worry about)
We all have to get out and vote so that we will see the happy dance.
Humm…I endorse LMAO, LMAO endorse me?
Fine. I will come out with a Pro-Frank J. post detailing all the reasons he should be the winner.
Drat. I had a great last minute scandal to unleash too.
Two words…Protein Wisdom!
That’s it. Frank J!!
Frank denied my appeal to have a date with Sarah K’s sister. I will now be voting my Class C to SCRAPPLEFACE?
All your blog are belong to us.
Ninja..poof..vanish
Hey, I voted for you. Where’s my donut?
And so began the great Humor Blogwar, known for its limitless treachery and destruction.
Alas, it can only end after much kung fu fighting. Fortunately, our hero Frank J. has developed a new and unbeatable technique!
Scrappleface is still handing you your ass! Do more funny!
Holy CRAP!!
I just put 50 votes out there (for Scrappleface of course). I budged it from 28.0% to 28.1%.
I estimated the tide turned roughly at vote number 48. This means you are going to need a grand total of 3648 more votes just to catch up. This is on top of current voting estimates. So you are going to need roughly 729.6 votes extra, PER DAY just to catch him. Give it up Frank this wasn’t meant to be. (Especially if I keep voting. I have the potential to add several hundred a day if I had the time and inclination).
Oh sorry, I just noted on that website that polls close Dec 12th. Not through the twelfth. This means you have to increase your votes by 36.11881188E per hour to catch up. Or about 860 per 24 hour period.
Ninja out…
What is wrong with you people?
I indorse IraqWarWrong Blog for best blog #25000-35000. It was at 10.8% two days ago but yetreday was only 10.4% and today’s down too 9.8%. It’s a tarvesty that IWW’s vote count is faltering (just like Ohio) and I incorage all of you to vote for IWW.
Wow, good job guys. I see you got off your butts and bumped Frank .3% points. At this rate you may draw the race to a real close one. But it doesn’t matter. Frank will still lose. Tell you what, tomorrow why don’t you vote for Scrappleface? Just once. So even when Scrapple wins, that way you can claim that you voted for Scrappleface, even though really you were trying to get Frank to win. It might save face in a social situation.
I might just have to vote for rightwingduck tomorrow, just so he doesn’t feel bad.
The hell with this.
Next year, I take myself off of the top shelf and run against every stinking one of you.
I have 365 days to build up a portfolio of material to make all of you my bitches.
Beg for mercy now, because I will show none next year.
you didn’t mention Bill Whittle for best essayist! go vote for eject eject eject for best essayist!
If this is what passes as wingnut humor, it is no wonder the world sees reactionaries as people with pokers shoved up their arses. You may be many things, Frank, but funny ain’t one of them.
Dam(nit), no sooner than we kicked liberal girly man “arse”(hehe)in Nov. we have this. Vote people, vote! Throw your mommy a link & make her vote too. If she’s not as puter literate as we are and says “I clicked the link and nothing happened…” then make her sit there and click til somethin’ happens by golly. Remember all those dishes she made you wash and rewash?! Get that vote! This is just like the 2004 elections, liberals don’t want FrankJ to win and we don’t want liberals to have ANYTHING they want, do we? You don’t have to think IMAO is funny to WIN and make them cry.
But I think IMAO is totally funny and stuff.
Meryl’s a jooooo?
Cool! Now the International Zionist Conspiracy owes me a favor 🙂
Good point, moehawk.
Scrappleface is about to best you again… Why I am not surprised?