What a beating. Seacrest says ’70s dance music, and I say where’s the barf bag? Now, I’m not a ’70s dance music hata, but that means yet another week of Scott boring me with a nondescript song and Anthony doing a bad dance in too-tight pants.
Constantine 01 – “Nights on Broadway” by the BeeGees. I love the BeeGees (shut up). Is the sound bad again tonight, or is it just Constantine? And if it’s the sound, isn’t this the fifth or sixth time, and shouldn’t that guy have been fired by now? I thought Constantine was good but not fantastic, but Simon was more harsh than I would have been.
Note to AI judges: Y’all have the absolute suckiest vocabularies in the history of man. If all Randy can come up with is “Oh My —” and all Paula can come up with is to repeat “Oh My —“, please, someone, get them a dictionary, a thesaurus, something not so blasphemous.
Carrie 02 — “Macarthur Park” by Donna Summer. Color me cringing, the hair is back. The dress is horribly pink and sparkly, and the tomboy in me wants to run screaming from the rose parade. Anyway, she sounded awesome, though the beginning was a tinge rough.
Scott 03 — “Everlasting Love” — Nondescript, boring, I can’t wait for him to go.
Paula needs to be smacked on the back of the head, and I’d love for Simon to be the one to do it. Does she even know how to criticize? Or stand up straight? Or not appear high?
Anthony 04 — “Don’t Take Away the Music” — He’s wearing brown, but he’s doing that squat dancy step thingy. Oh, oh, oh, we have to keep him around another week to see him do that moonwalk/cabbage patch wonky combo. I liked the vocal.
SIMON: … and a bit insipid.
PAULA: Whatever.
TRANSLATION: I don’t know what incipid means.
Vonzell 05 — “I’m Every Woman” — Her shirt looks like a paint by number that got away from little Johnny. But wow, she did a splendid job.
Anwar 06 — “September” — Anwar won’t need to go shopping, because ’70s seems to be his standard wardrobe, yay for cost savings. The backup singers are overpowering Anwar, shame on them. That was okay, but nothing outstanding.
Bo 07 — “Vehicle” — Well he is back with the energy and rockin’ the house like he should be… if only I wasn’t recoiling from all that taking of the Lord’s name in vain. Bad song, great performance.
My order tonight:
Bo
Carrie
Vonzell
Constantine
Anthony
Anwar
Scott
First!
after the revolution, the first to be sterilized will be AI viewers…
MacArthur Park. Gag! This is one of the (many) songs that sound better in the Weird Al remix (here, ‘Jurassic Park’: “Someone shut the fence off, in the raaiin”).
Listening to Scott (get a pitch, and stick with it, even if it’s wrong, just pick ONE pitch per song, puleeeeese) seems to be the price to be paid to watch the weekly train wreck that is P. Abdul. It’s grotesquely fascinating. How Simon manaages to keep from smacking her upside the head is right beyond me.
2 things:
1) i don’t watch idol, but i can hear it when my roommate listens to it (while i play video games), and paula’s inability to criticize even the poorest performances annoys me like no other.
2) i like when you post your idol thing, just because it makes other people mad
Yep, Scott’s out of there. Anwar has no rhythm which is kind of funny seeing as…uh, nevermind.
I need to hook some battery cables to my toes so I can shock myself every time I start liking Constantine (help me, I don’t want to!!).
All I can say is Frank is whipped…..this must be love
okay, saying My God, or Goddamn isn’t blasphemous (inapropriet, maybe, but not blasphemous). Its when you do things like invoke God as being the reason why you should break up with someone, when the only reason your saying that is because your too much of a coward to tell them the real reason. ie: “I think God wants us to go in different directions.”
My old roommate’s ex used that as a reason to break up, and I think it was the next day she was dating someone. That was the closest i ever came to slapping a girl.
I’m glad you posted about the sound. I was thinking maybe it was just me. Sounded like the stage mic was off and all we were hearing were the ambience mics. Ironically, everything but the performances sounded fine.
Is Paula sharing makeup tips with Constantine?
To me, Scott sounded better than he has… ever. Maybe it was because the sound sucked and I couldn’t hear him very well. That’s my theory about why he’s lasted so long. I’m listening on $5000 worth of audio gear and can hear every missed note and bit of “pitchiness”. The rest of America must be listening through the busted 3″ speaker on their 19″ TV.
Okay, Donna Summer did a COVER of “MacArthur Park”, but it is in no way a “Donna Summer song”. Jimmy Webb wrote it, and Richard Harris recorded the definitive version. And, somebody, please, give Carrie some help with song selection. The girl can sing, but she can’t pick songs for beans.
Is there anyone who considers “Vehicle” a “dance” song? Anyone? Bo did a good job with it, but he really stretched the theme to the breaking point on that one.
And speaking of themes, who the heck is coming up with the horrible, awful, make me puke themes? Show tunes? ’70s dance music? What’s next, the jitterbug hit parade?
It really pains me to say this, but Simon is the only thing keeping me watching this season. And even he seems to have been at least partially defanged. When Paula isn’t acting like her next job depends on the contestants liking her, she looks about ready to make a munchie run. And Randy… “Dog… Pitchy.. Awright” I’ve heard parrots with larger vocabularies.
Tip for Constantine & Bo:
PUT. THE MIKE STAND. DOWN.
Think of another way to occupy your hands.
Please!
I remember when this blog didn’t suck. It wasn’t that long ago.
“okay, saying My God, or Goddamn isn’t blasphemous (inapropriet, maybe, but not blasphemous).”
it’s not blasphemous, but it IS taking the Lord’s name in vain, which if you read the bible, is a big no-no.
“Vehicle” … if only I wasn’t recoiling from all that taking of the Lord’s name in vain. Bad song, great performance.
I beg to differ on this one. “Vehicle” is one of my all-time favorite songs, not least of which because it has monster hooks and a great horn-band sound. The phrase “great God in Heaven” is used rather cavalierly in the lyrics, but it’s a great deal milder than a lot of what goes on lyrically these days, and is readily replacable with less-offensive phrases (such as, but not limited to, “great gosh ah-mitey”). So in closing, I’d hardly call it a bad song.
biff needs to up his meds…….lighten up. maybe you need vacation.
Actually I agree with Sarah on something here. Bring your barf bag to IMAO from now on. You’ll need it.
…because apparently, Biff plans on commenting a lot from here on out!
gets his barf bag ready for Biff’s next comment
I figured out why Simon is always so negative about EVERY single performance… He must spend the hour before American Idol watching Nashville Star, where the talent a ability are REAL and the losers on AI can’t even come close!
blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is basically any sin that is not repented. Taking the Lord’s name in vain is… what’s that word I’m looking for? oh yeah. Sin. And it seems to be all the latest generation knows how to say.
Well the Lord’s name is not ‘God’ so saying ‘God’ is not blasphemy or taking the Lord’s name in vain.
blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is basically any sin that is not repented.
That is a rather glib definition of “blasphemy of the Holy Spirit”. Furthermore, there is some degree of debate on the subject. Some subscribe to your interpretation; one such is preacherstudy.com:
However, this is not the only position on the matter. For example, hornes.org says:
Yet another view is represented at Alan Yusko’s site:
and
On similar lines is this quote from gotquestions.org:
As you can see, there’s a bit more to the issue than your (somewhat snarky) reply let on. I don’t deride your righteous anger against sin (in fact, it’s admirable), but I’m not certain your attitude in discussing this is entirely charitable.
Good Lord! (ooops) Some of you people are picky and frankly, downright rude! Leave her alone, if you don’t like the blog, don’t read it. And what’s up with all the bible stuff in the comments??
CC,
I have nothing but respect for sarahk, and try to couch any disagreements I might have with her through the framework of that respect.
Disagreement does not equal rudeness in and of itself. Just so you know. ;o)
I do like IMAO rather much, and I’ve held that the addition of the other bloggers to the fold is a positive thing from the very beginning. Therefore, I’ll continue to read it, and I’ll make whatever comments I see fit (filtered through my respect for the blog as a whole and the bloggers as individuals, of course). :o)
Finally, “all the Bible stuff in the comments” is related to the backing up of points made in the discussion. Since we’re discussing a Biblical concept, Bible quotes are quite relevant. ;o)
Hope that helps! :o)
Disagreement does not equal rudeness in and of itself, yes..that is true, yet the word you chose (snarky) was.. just so you know.. :)~
And this isn’t a discussion about the bible, it’s a discussion about American Idol..just so you know.. :)~
I used the word “snarky” because I thought that Sarah’s reply sounded a little, well… snarky. If using the proper adjective to express my thoughts is rude, then I suppose I’m guilty as charged. ;o)
Yes, the discussion in general is a discussion of American Idol. Related to that, however, was an observation Sarah made that a particular phrase in the lyrics of the song “Vehicle” took the Lord’s name in vain (a Biblical concept). From there, Sarah’s next reply brought in the concept of blaspheming the Holy Spirit (another Biblical concept). When a sub-discussion that is related to the core discussion in a limited way splinters off from the core discussion, it is called a tangent. Tangents are part and parcel of any discussion, particularly those that take place on the internet.
My replies were germane to that particular tangent of the conversation. If you don’t like this tangent’s Biblical flavor, please remember that Sarah has contributed to it, too before you attempt to school me on it. ;o)