Outraged by AOL? We AM!!

World Net Daily is reporting that AOL’s new phrase “I AM Instant Messaging” seems to offend Christian sensibilities. (hat tip: Outside the Beltway).
Can you imagine opening your AOL account and seeing the marketing phrase “I AM”? For one, it means you’re an idiot because you’re using AOL — but let’s focus on the other victim in this fiasco.
Here for you is an IMAO exclusive reader who is outraged by the latest blasphemy from AOL.


popeye1.jpg
Popeye: Oy. I am what I am. And that’s all that I am.
RWD: Popeye, what was your reaction when you saw this horrible marketing message?
Popeye: I am what I am. And that’s all that I am. I didn’t have much to begin with, after hurricane Katrina wiped out my Spinach warehouse. (mumbling- Presdient Bush hates Spinach) Now they’ve taken my phrase – those wiley rascals.
RWD: So, this offends you. They took your phrase, Popeye.
Popeye: My life hasn’t been going so well. I was going to have a big star play me in a movie — but then Robert Blake got arrested…
RWD: Yes, Popeye, but what about the “I AM” issue?
Popeye: I am what I am. And that’s all that I am. I tells you, I’m going to “moidalize” them. I ain’t been the same since Olive Oil got admitted into that anorexia clinic. And then she tells me that sweetpea isn’t even mine. I never for a minute thought–
RWD: Well, that does it for today’s interview. Popeye appears to have other problems.
In the meantime, let me offer IMAO every assurance that the new AOL phrase was never meant to offend any religious group. In fact, AOL screened it carefully to make sure that it was safe to use among Muslims.

13 Comments

  1. Wow! I’m a Christian, and I would sooner be offended by caricatures of Mohammed than anything AOL would do.
    It’s not like they said, “Yahweh Instant Messaging.” Although, that kind of rings. Maybe a cool name for a prayer initiative. I gotta let my pastor know about that…

  2. are you serious? “I AM” ???? i dont see the connection from GOD to I AM. yes AOL sucks. and the marketing of this “I AM” think is horrible. i just immagine a commercial for it. someone at a computer and signs on at AOL and then starts instant messaging. and then yells “I AM INSTANT MESSAGING!!”
    AOL/Apple/Hyprid cars/PETA/environmentalist all suck it hard.

  3. Christians around the world should take a clue from our Muslim friends, members of the “religion of peace”, and their reaction to the newspaper cartoons of Muhammad. We should start violent protests and call for the heads of AOL executives. We should burn things, kidnap hostages, surround AOL buildings and chant “Death to AOL! Death to AOL!” Isn’t that what every peaceful religion does when it finds something offensive?
    (Actually the violent protest idea doesn’t sound half bad, but not over the stupid IAM name…just because AOL sucks.)

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