At yesterday’s funeral for Coretta Scott King, we witnessed what Democrats do best: Bash Bush at every opportunity. Although some felt this was inappropriate for a funeral, many were grateful that they didn’t use her casket as a podium.
What surprised me was that Jimmy Carter was the first to kick off the Bush Bash. Now, you might ask yourself, “Self, who the hell is this nut bag?”
Well, hold on to your history books, it’s time to take a short look at…
The Top Accomplishments of Jimmy Carter
Former President Carter had the honor of having a loser, embarrassing brother; A proud tradition he carried over from President John F. Kennedy. (Teddy, I’m looking at you.)
In a tight economy, the Carter administration worked with the Iranians to have them care for American citizens for 444 days. This saved American businesses thousands of dollars.
Unfortunately, this ‘savings’ came to an end when that Bastard Ronald Reagan decides that these visitors needed ‘freedom.’
President Carter was once a member of the Bee Gees. Years later, he would be surprised to discover that they were men.
Jimmy Carter travels the world ensuring that elections are carried out fairly and offering certification of election results.
Some elections have even been certified AFTER the voting was completed.
In the 70’s, Jimmy shocked the nation when he admitted to having impure thoughts.: about the Bee Gees.
Although mislabeled as a gas shortage, it was indeed good for the environment. Plus those long lines were a great way to get to know your neighbors.
Waiting in line to gain absolutely nothing turned out to become an important selling point for the DNC .
Under President Carter, the military had few successful campaigns, but many successful bake sales. This allowed the army to buy more green things such as trucks, uniforms, and food.
Mr. Carter has been very active in working with Habitat for Humanity. An organization that creates housing for people who otherwise would have no hope of owning a home. Many times, he even pitches in to help build. This is a very odd sight: It’s one of the few times you’ll ever see a Democrat hit a nail right on the head.
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I hope this educational primer entertained and informed. If not — Blame Bush.
We at IMAO pride ourselves on our ability to educate and enlighten. So the next time you see Jimmy Carter you can say, “Hey, I know who you are – I LOVED the Bee Gees!”
The best thing about Jimmy Carter is that his presidency resulted directly in eight years of a Ronald Reagan presidency. The second-best thing is that, while Reagan was being inaugurated on January 20, 1981, Carter was filling out the paperwork (agreeing to amnesty for the criminals who had captured the embassy, etc., which includes Iran’s current leader) to complete the freeing of the hostages.
I laughed out loud as soon as I saw the title…I knew this was gonna be good, and it lived up to my expectations.
Best piece of information that I learned:
“In a tight economy, the Carter administration worked with the Iranians to have them care for American citizens for 444 days. This saved American businesses thousands of dollars.”
Good for him! Up until now, I’ve always considered Carter one of the more useless presidents, but I guess he was just being considerate of American Businesses!
Thanks for the educational moment, Ducky.
What about his brave defense against aquatic attack rabbits?
Discusting that a former President would behave the way he did at King’s funeral. There was a certain code that former Presidents followed, out of respect to the Oval office. Even President Carter followed that code for quite awhile, but apparently he’s having to many dinners with Michael Moore and Cindy Sheehan. I’m so disgusted with the former President, but then again, not surprised.
Carter was responsible for reducing the deforestation of Georgia swampland by “controlling” the swamps rabbit population.
D’oh.
I forgot the rabbit!!
I was in the Navy during Carter. Never had enough money to get the supplies we needed. I was in supply so I found ways to beg borrow and steal what we needed. Reagan was Godsend!.
From the usually left-wing pen of Tom Paxton:
President Carter got into his boat.
Wasn’t in a hurry, wanted to float,
Think about the country,
Think about sin.
Along came a rabbit
And he tried to climb in.
And what did Jimmy say?
I don’t wanna bunny-wunny
In my widdle wow-boat,
In my widdle wow-boat in the pond,
‘Cause the bunny might be cwazy
And he’d bite me in the fwoat
In my widdle wow-boat in the pond.
I think he might be even nuttier than Billy. Maybe if someone named a beer after him that would boost his popularity.
What about when Carter gave away the Panama Canal…such fond memories we have of that peanut-brained President.
You forgot his greatest accomplishment:
He was history’s greatest monster.
My sweet spouse was in the Navy under Jimmy Carter ( a grown man being called Jimmy is just a little silly isn’t it – one would have thought he’d have grown up a little bit). In the four years he was president we lost 21 percent of our buying power. He cut cost of living raises to less than 2 percent while inflation went through the roof. At the base where my husband was stationed, there was real talk of a strike or at least a “sick out.” The sailors figured at least in jail they’d get free room and board and they wouldn’t have to stand duty. They wouldn’t get paid but they wouldn’t have to work either.
As a matter of fact now that I think about it, Carter treated the military like a “plantation.” He was a man before his time
By their fruits shall ye know them.
In 1980 Jimmy Carter decided that the cause of inflation was consumer spending and told the American people to throw away their credit cards. The bank I was working for was forced to lay off employees due to the sharp downturn in an already lousy economy. I lost my job in April of 1980. I’m proud to say that with my help, Jimmy Carter lost his in November.
Frank, it would appear that most of your readers are WAY older than us.