I am Joe.

I saw Edward Snowden on the news.  It said he had a stripper girlfriend. But I can not see her because I don’t not have the internets password for the big people.  I can only go to Dora pages.  And NPR.  Sasha said he told the chinamens our secrets.  That was not smart.  I would have traded for chinamen secrets too.  But nanna already knows how to do my laundry good, so maybe we don’t need the ancient chinamen secrets.

Sasha said he told everyone that the NSA is listening to our calls and our e-mails.  I asked her what is the NSA, and she said it was the Naughty Spanking Association.  It was their job to find naughty people and spank them hard with a wooden spoon.  Or a belt.  That is why they are listening to everyones calls to find the naughty people.  You haven’t been naughty, have you?  Oh no!  I have been naughty!  I sended a e-mail to Speaker ‘Boner’ with a coupon for vigra and texted Missus Boss that she was a poopy head because she wouldn’t not let me see the stripper girlfriend or have dessert.  Now I am scared.  I don’t want to be spanked hard with a wooden spoon or a belt. I am going to Dragon Chow’s Super Happy Lucky Buffet to see if they will hide me for more secrets.

I am Joe.