Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
… voting Republican or voting Democrat only once.
… being productive.
…owning guns
… open heterosexual activity.
…reading legislation
…baking cookies
… failure to participate vigorously enough in the daily 2-minute hate.
…doing anything that might be construed as “helpful” to anyone who isn’t connected to the Obama administration
… serious attempts to actually solve the problem the agency was created to fix.
… responding quickly and completely to an FOIA request.
… cooperating with Congress.
thinking.
… any knowledge of the Constitution.
…, having a questionalbe record of birth, using the same phrases over and over again (such as “Let me be clear”), not being able to speak coherently unless reading out loud, having close associates who appear to be gangsters from Chicago, regularly changing the subject when asked dificult questions, not showing for regular meetings with staff, and having a past history of drug use and still acting like a dope.
@13 I would have loved to have used “but the order was rescinded after 12.327 federal employees filed reports on Obama”, but the way the straight line was phrased, I couldn’t do it.
… going to Chick-Fil-A for lunch.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
Ignoring the Constitution and failure to uphold one’s oath the faithfully defend it.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
breathing.
breeding.
believing.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
liking bacon and cookies.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
not contributing to the DNC.
not leaking specific information to the press that the White House wants leaked.
not promoting liberal causes through arbitrary enforcement of federal regulations.
… trying to rescue an Ambassador in distress.
…not auditing Tea Party groups.
paying taxes
…making subversive comments like “responsible stewardship of the taxpayers dollars”
…showing up on time for work, taking a reasonable lunch break and working a full day.
…Shooting a shotgun off the back porch or saying ‘Malarky’ a lot.
…having Republican or Tea Party bumper stickers.
…excessive purchases of wookie depilatory.
… praying or attending any Christian church.
…splitting a pair of nines in Blackjack.
…having “Garry Owen” as a ring tone.
Installing one of these
spending all day on the Wookie Lover’s web site.
suspicion of an IQ exceeding 2 digits
not having a picture of Teh Won on their desks
a commitment to personal responsibility
Depends on the dealer’s upcard…
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
…taking any actions that would help the American people
…saying the Pledge
…eating a hamburger or a hot dog. Ya know, that weird foreign food
…hiring a legal alien
…having a high capacity stapler on their desk. Come on, people, we need reasonable office supply rules!
…being caught reading IMAO!
– Having a pocket constitution visible on their desk.
– Having imao or nukingpolitics in their browsing history
– Speaking disparagingly of Islam and/or Mohammed
– Not speaking disparagingly of all things Christian or Jewish
– Acting as if people of the same gender having sex with each other is some kind of, oh, I dunno….deviancy
– Not agreeing that Christians, conservatives & veterans aren’t our most dire national security threat
– Failure to use the words “homophobe”, “racist”, “white privilege” and “haters” often enough
– Calling illegal aliens illegal aliens
– Calling a spade a spade
– Hippy punching
– Saying that yes, it’s true that the Founders didn’t say anything about God in the Constitution, but that was because they didn’t have to because anyone with a pea for a brain knows that the Declaration of Independence, which is the moral and philosophical foundation and justification for the American Way of Life, acknowledges God as Nature’s God, our Creator, the bestower of life & liberty, the Supreme Judge of the world, and our divine Providential protector.
– Pointing out that “promote the general welfare” is not a justification for the nanny state
– Not expressing gratitude that the Feds only take fifty percent of their paycheck
…the act of reporting any fellow employees’ actions.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
… being gainfully employed.
… failure to donate to the DNC.
… owning a firearm.
… having read the U. S. Constitution.
… failing to bow to Mecca five times daily.
… not owning Mein Kampf.
… no statue of Lenin on his desk.
… failing to have been aborted.
…being considerate and/or helpful when dealing with the public.
…quoting Starship Troopers (the book, not the movie).
…getting any work done during business hours.
… Freudian slips like “I’ve gotta take a Wikileak” or “I’m totally Snowden. . . I mean snowed under!”
… saying things like, “Wait a minute, I voted for Romney; how did my district go 100% for Obama?”
…failing to blame bush
…bathing on a regular basis
…failing to memorize Rules for Radicals
… sharing the Paine instead of sharing the pain.
President Obama ordered federal employees to report the suspicious actions of their colleagues. These include…
everything and anything, just to be on the safe side.
…being a snitch, unless the snitchee is an old white guy.
…not being a highschool dropout with no qualifications for your job that gives you access to sensitive and classified data.
…not bringing a representative sample of hookers to your hotel room for questioning when your detail is sent ahead to set up security.
…practicing what your preacher preaches unless your preacher is Rev. Wright.
…flailing and moaning when under the buss wheels.
…questioning orders
(This thread has given me a flashback I can’t shake: ATTACK WAAAAAAAAAATCH….)
…reporting the suspicious actions of their colleagues
…….posting on IMAO and Nuking Politics.
incessant repeating of the words Klaatu Verata Nikto at low volumes
….tweeting to the hashtag #SharkNado more than 5 times.
…not sharing with your coworkers about how you were able to get more health insurance subsidies without having any “real” children, because you need to share the wealth.
…complaints about shoulders being in the way when requested to @$$ kiss.
…women who give birth to their children rather than abort them.
…anyone who does not turn their guns over to Mexican drug lords.
…not taking their soma.
…watching Mel Gibson movies.
…driving Fords.
…knowing who Matt Drudge is when pressed during their weekly polygraph.
…failing to include the appropriate amount of greens in their bag lunch.
Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!
Refusing a teabagging offer.