Apparently there is a drug you can take to make watching soccer interesting though it may cause violent behavior.

“I support rich people other than me paying more in taxes.” -Democrats

“Sorry; computer crash. We lost all emails on Watergate.”
“And why were Woodward and Bernstein killed with a drone strike?”
“No comment.”

So these lost emails basically mean we need the government to be more competent before we can hold it accountable for its incompetency.

You have to feel for Dana Milbank; it must be enraging when people on the right don’t fit his preconceived caricatures.

“And then they pointed at a woman with a headscarf, yelled, ‘Mooslim!’, and killed and ate her. At least, that’s what I FELT happened.”

I actually might want to be a reporter; that sounds fun.

Remember to support Liberty Island’s crowdfunding campaign and get my first novel.

Can you imagine how good a novel by me would be? No; you can’t. That’s why I had to write it.

Imagine me writing a scifi action adventure while trying to occasionally be serious. You can’t. That’s why you need to get my novel.

Except you can’t get it yet. But you can support the Liberty Island crowfunding campaign and get it soon.

You can even get a signed copy. “I got this before Frank J. Fleming was insanely famous.”

A signed copy of the first edition of my first novel will have to be worth $1 million a decade from now, though you won’t want to sell it.

If for some insane reason we started calling soccer “football” in the US, what would we call football? Smashball? Tackleball? Huddling?

So was Dana Milbank’s comparison of that Heritage panel with the Red Wedding apt?

I really don’t get the World Cup; I already spend most of the year watching people not score soccer goals.

I don’t get people getting murdered over lost soccer games; 0-0 ties more likely to make me murderous.

Might as well just add a judge at the end who awards the winner to whichever team kicked the ball the most.

You need to read this 40 page thesis paper on why a 0-0 tie in soccer is actually exciting.

I’d watch the entire World Cup rather than actually read Hillary Clinton’s book.

I kinda miss the vuvuzelas.

There was something magical about vuvuzelas. It took the ridiculous inscrutability of the appeal of soccer to a new level.

Someone actually decided what soccer was lacking was a constant annoying sound. It’s hard not to give in to such lovely madness.

I’m only terrorizing people with my viewpoint on guns because I saw a YouTube video.

The thing with Hillary is she’ll be able to campaign as “probably better than Obama” and GOP will have trouble contradicting her on that.