(A Guest Post by Harvey of Bad Example)
Since you folks seem inordinately entertained by violence against hippies, I was reminded of a piece I posted last October on my old Bad Money blog. It’s short, but I think you’ll enjoy the mental images it conjures. Here it is, ever so slightly modified:

At Harv’s Hippy Cleansing Center, we turn filthy hippies back into productive citizens through the magic of negative reinforcement. Let me just grab my Louisville Slugger ClueBat, and I’ll give you a tour:
Here in the Rush Room, we break spirits with 24-7 re-runs of Rush Limbaugh.
Hippy: Please! I’m going crazy! Just let me have five minutes of NPR!
Harv: No! [WHACK!] Bad hippy! [WHACK!] We don’t use the N-word here! [WHACK!]
Moving on, we have the cafeteria. Converting vegetarians can be difficult, so we usually start them off with McDonald’s hamburgers, which are mostly just sawdust & rat turds anyway.
Hippy: Please! Just one bite of tofu? A bean sprout? Anything that didn’t used to have eyes?
Harv: Here, eat this! [WHACK!]
In this room, Emperor Misha is holding a class on Basic Human Decency:
Misha: All right asshats, pop quiz: A Paleswinian explodes on a bus full of kids. Good or Bad?
Hippy: Well, the root causes–
Misha: WRONG! [WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK!] There. Now you’re smarter.
Harv: Or deader.
Misha: Eh. Whichever.
Well, I gotta go lead a hygiene seminar. Thanks for coming, and …
Damn hippy! Stop trying to smoke the soap! [WHACK!]

See also the “200 Words or Less” Monthly Archive category in the right sidebar at Bad Money. However, be aware that load times are unconscionably slow, which I why I moved to a new site.