I sent Jacques Chirac a picture of me brandishing a hammer, and he surrendered all of France to me. I think I’ll sell it on eBay. What should be the reserve?
AndyB,
That’s not a bad suggestion, however France is already overpopulated with AntiAmerican liberals known as the French. I don’t think they could hold any more.
I’d say make the reserve a bottle of rare wine. American wine, no less. Say…
Araujo 1994 Cabernet Sauvignon.
I think the idea of selling Fwance for a bottle of American wine is a jolly good one.
I’ll tell you what. I’ll take France off of your hands and you won’t have to pay me anything!
I plan on turning all of France into my prison camp.Erect a giant wall all around France to contain the stench and those nasty liberals, and then dump all prisoners there.
I think that would be a major deterent for most criminals. Who wants to live out the remainder of their days with the French.
Its very simple. First place soap dispensers in all public places, and mandate daily bathing. Then as all the French begin migrating away you get all of your friends, and move them in. Now you demand from the UN the same involvement in their affairs that the French has always had. Once the population is on average no longer French you apply for statehood in the U.S. When that is granted you use the precident of a US State having its own seat on the UN to get all of the other states UN seats. Then with the all the votes the US now has you declare all members of the UN to be vassle nations under the United States of Earth.
Oh, unfirst. Like it’s even possible to talk about the French without mentioning surrendering, cheese, wine, or body odor. French history itself is like a joke you’ve heard before. Please. Show some understanding of international relations, man.
Slapout and Ian have the right idea, but they don’t go far enough. This is a hostile takeover. In such situations the whole is, almost by definition, less than the sum of its parts. Sell the whole thing piecemeal.
Of course you’ll want to sell off the Eiffel tower, the Champs-Elyesse and any artistic and historical treasures you might find seperately; but don’t let the big things cause you to miss other opportunities. You could sell the copper wiring from their houses and the stonework from their chateaus. Then you could sell the rest of their infrastructure piecemeal.
I’ll pay you twenty bucks for all the nuclear powerplants there. Nuclear energy is pretty much the only thing they got that we could use here in the U.S.
Everyone is off the mark here. You have an opportunity to make some real money here. Set it at 1 billion but make sure you send a link for the auction to John Kerry. I’ll bet he can hit his wife up for the money. You have to have a couple of conditions though, he has to move there and take Ted Kennedy, the Clintons and most of Hollywood with him.
No one would buy it. So I say… 1 cent.
.50 cents.
You should at least try and get a box of rounds for it.
I hope you specified “local pickup.”
France would make a good concentra… I mean “summer” camp for liberals.
In francs or dollars?
AndyB,
That’s not a bad suggestion, however France is already overpopulated with AntiAmerican liberals known as the French. I don’t think they could hold any more.
500 kufis.
They’ve got some cool landmarks and churches. Can you sell those without the people? You might actually make some decent money.
Ian~
They’d have to get rid of the smell first.
I’d say make the reserve a bottle of rare wine. American wine, no less. Say…
Araujo 1994 Cabernet Sauvignon.
I think the idea of selling Fwance for a bottle of American wine is a jolly good one.
Well, you might be able to pawn the big tower thing off to someone.
I’ll tell you what. I’ll take France off of your hands and you won’t have to pay me anything!
I plan on turning all of France into my prison camp.Erect a giant wall all around France to contain the stench and those nasty liberals, and then dump all prisoners there.
I think that would be a major deterent for most criminals. Who wants to live out the remainder of their days with the French.
Its very simple. First place soap dispensers in all public places, and mandate daily bathing. Then as all the French begin migrating away you get all of your friends, and move them in. Now you demand from the UN the same involvement in their affairs that the French has always had. Once the population is on average no longer French you apply for statehood in the U.S. When that is granted you use the precident of a US State having its own seat on the UN to get all of the other states UN seats. Then with the all the votes the US now has you declare all members of the UN to be vassle nations under the United States of Earth.
how bout writing an In My World instead of taking over useless places in your spare time
frank j is now recycling french surrender monkey jokes we;ve heard thousands of times before?
Oh, unfirst. Like it’s even possible to talk about the French without mentioning surrendering, cheese, wine, or body odor. French history itself is like a joke you’ve heard before. Please. Show some understanding of international relations, man.
Well, You could make it into a Hippie Reserve, and go on beating trips….
About slapout’s idea – it should be easy to retrofit the Eiffel Tower as an oil derrick…
Slapout and Ian have the right idea, but they don’t go far enough. This is a hostile takeover. In such situations the whole is, almost by definition, less than the sum of its parts. Sell the whole thing piecemeal.
Of course you’ll want to sell off the Eiffel tower, the Champs-Elyesse and any artistic and historical treasures you might find seperately; but don’t let the big things cause you to miss other opportunities. You could sell the copper wiring from their houses and the stonework from their chateaus. Then you could sell the rest of their infrastructure piecemeal.
Two dolla! Germany love you long time.
I’ll pay you twenty bucks for all the nuclear powerplants there. Nuclear energy is pretty much the only thing they got that we could use here in the U.S.
Everyone is off the mark here. You have an opportunity to make some real money here. Set it at 1 billion but make sure you send a link for the auction to John Kerry. I’ll bet he can hit his wife up for the money. You have to have a couple of conditions though, he has to move there and take Ted Kennedy, the Clintons and most of Hollywood with him.
Hell take one of your moon nukes and end the freakin conversation. Lousy stinky lefty ingrates deserve it.
Now that I think about it, You should have also brandished a sickle and Black Jack Chiraque would have appointed you as Minister of Public WELFARE!
One wheel of camembert cheese . . . mmm . . . camembert.
I would donate it to the U.S. Navy to replace the Vieques Range.
so you want France without all the French? EASY, just take the U-238 Jacket off the nuke… instant Neutron bomb….