Dean Barnett has the most informative post I’ve bothered to read about the surge and why that number (21,500) of new troops was settled on. It’s done in his entertaining and informative FAQ format that seems to be specifically made for my ADD.
Also, Mary Katharine (Superstar!) Ham has a video fisking of the Democratic Response to President Bush’s speech about the surge using previous statements from Democrats about the war. Also, look for something familiar on MKH’s desk…
BTW, search inside the book for Chronicles of Dubya should soon be available on Amazon, as you can now see searches on that site for “Rumsfeld Strangler” and “Operation Wacky Iraqi Attacky” finally give results.

Top Scientists today announced changes to the Doomsday Clock.
“The Doomsday clock has always signaled the end of the world. With the advancement of nuclear weaponry in Iran and North Korea, we feel we’re getting closer to the edge. However, we felt compelled to make adjustments to help us get through the long nuclear winter.”
Scientists hope that my having Doomsday Savings Time (DST) we should be able to get a few more hours each day of gloomy darkness.
Doomsday Savings Time will apply to all 50 states with the exception of Arizona.

The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists is moving the Doomday Clock up in light of developments in North Korea, Iran, and global climate shift increasing the proliferation of “peaceful” nuclear energy ventures.
What are other Scientific Bulletins doing?

• The Bulletin of Weird Scientists have denounced Anthony Michael Hall for the seventeenth time.
• The Bulletin of Short Scientists is demanding stepladders and the heavy equipment storage moved closer to the floor.
• The Bulletin of Scientologists has Tom Cruise of the cover. Last issue was John Travolta. And before that, Tome Cruise. And before that, John Travolt- wait, why are you asking this? What is your Theta level, drone?
• The Bulletin of Blind Scientists (published in Braille) condemns Miss Sakamoto for the seventeenth time.

I don’t think I’ve covered them all… what other scientific bulletins doing in their latest issues?

Continue reading ‘Science!’ »

It’s Friday, so you know it’s time for the wire services to post the non sequitur non-news story of Mahmoud Abbas praying at a mosque.
However, this week’s different… this week we’re going to start a new feature called:

WHAT IS MAHMOUD ABBAS PRAYING FOR?
So, from Mahmoud Abbas’ expressions, can you tell what Mahmoud Abbas is praying for?
Is it:

a) The imam to quit being so cheap and buy some solvent for the glue that’s keeping that hat stuck to his head.

b) His mommy to knit him a scarf as pretty as the one the guy next to him has.

c) McDonalds to quit saying they’re still selling double cheeseburgers for a buck when all they do is make them smaller and smaller.

d) Yasser’s old henchman Achmed Tibi to quit showing up to his rallies and setting up his “Free Breast Exams” booth.
or
e) None of the above
Put your guesses in the comments.

Ace calls liberals chickenhawks for saying we should focus on OBL and Afghanistan and then not signing up for the military to do that job. Yes, they are indisputably chickenhawks on that by their own “logic”… if you can call a phrase people parrot over and over to avoid debate “logic.”
Anyway, I expect policemen to confront violent felons, firemen to run into burning buildings, and the military to invade dangerous countries. It’s what my tax dollars pay for. I don’t have to apologize for those expectations. People who join the military aren’t stupid; they know they will be sent places they get shot at. When my brother joined the Marines well before 9/11, he was fully expecting (hoping for?) a conflict with North Korea.
Now, you can argue peacekeeping missions put our military men and women unnecessarily at risk, but anything that involves them killing people and blowing stuff up is simply in our troops’ job description and is expected of them. They know that. Liberals don’t know it, though, and that’s why the military hates them.

This is the classic question raised by child psychologists around the world. Every young boy goes through a crazy phase where they try on mommy’s high heels, put on silly hats, and play soccer. (Note: Not at the same time.)
It turns out that Posh Spice’s husband is some kind of soccer player. Not only that, but he appears to be coming to America and is gonna play right in my back yard!! (Note to self: Remember to go in the back yard and pick up the dog poo poo.)
After having done some research, I can honestly say that the evidence that soccer is gay is staggering.
Gay Examples:

Continue reading ‘Does Playing Soccer Make You Gay?’ »

Some people are acting like David Beckham coming to America is some big boon for our country, but that is wrong and false. America has many great sports, particularly football (the real kind, not the metric kind) and is in no need of another. If Beckham does cause Americans to take interest in soccer, the sole benefit is for the rest of the world. Soccer has long been the most popular sport in the world… except for in America which has had no interest in it. And, since America has all the money, that actually makes soccer one of the least popular sports in the world. What use is it to be a soccer star if no one knows you in America (which, again, has all the money)? It’s of no use at all, that’s what. I bet the least well known American baseball player makes more the most well known soccer player (until today, that is).
If Americans start paying attention to this third-world sport, then that suddenly gives legitimacy to the opinions of sucky countries. So, we would be doing a favor for the rest of the world… such a big one that I think we could cut back on foreign aid.