GOP Jingle

While everyone is talking about rebranding the Republican Party and what not, can I suggest something?

We need a catchy jingle.

A jingle is a great idea. Then we can get everyone humming about how they like Republicans. And when they get to the voting booth to decide who to vote for, the jingle is going to be stuck in their heads.

I’m not very musical though, so I’m not sure what it would be like.

“Cutting taxes, that’s our man!
Vote for your Republican!”

“Liberty, justice, and apple pie,
That’s a Republican and it’s no lie.”

“The Republican Party is the very best way,
Anyone says otherwise is probably gay.”

“Vote for a Republican and reduce the debt.
If you don’t, I’ll murder your pet.”

“Republicans will make America soar,
So vote for them, you stupid whore.”

Any better ideas?

39 Comments

  1. Liberals and moderates (more liberals) used to get hooked by a catchy jingle, but there were too many words and they found that they couldn’t think about something other than themselves for a whole 30 seconds.

    So, jingles needed to be cut down to a brief few words, like “I’m Lovin’ It” in order to stay within their limited attention span.

    Recently, it has become necessary to cut it down to one fairly benign word at a time, like “Hope” or “Change”, so as not to intrude into their personal life journeys.

    By the 2010 elections, we may need to shorten any slogans to something like “Duh”

  2. I suggest a nice haiku. We need something that will reach out to oppressed groups such as gays, unions, and people of color. They hardly get any positive attention in the corporate-controlled media, and that isn’t right. It isn’t fair. So instead of preaching about picket fences, abstinence, apple pie, and other hate-filled topics, we should have a jingle that celebrates our diversity as Republicans.

  3. No stems or seeds that you don’t need! Acapulco Gold’s some bad ass weed! Eh…okay we guess it really doesn’t apply, but ya gotta admit its a great jingle!….Cheech and Chong, still lost somewhere in California

  4. I stood stone-like at midnight, suspended in my masquerade
    I screwed my base till it was just mad and commanded that they vote McCain
    I was open to gain and earmarked to fame as I walked on a golden rug
    I strolled all alone through a bailout zone and came out with my base enraged
    I hid in the clouded, safe Senate halls, and when they said “vote to spend” I stood up

    Oooh-oooh, growing up.

    Well my head it finally took root in the truth, the Contract with America
    I brushed it off, moderned it up and now I’m ready to lead-a

    oooh-oooh, growing up. Ooooh-oohhh growing up.

  5. I really hate to inject some reality into teh funny (I’m a mom, I’m a gold winner fun stifling queen but not in a bad way).

    You know the difference between Demon-crats and real Republicans.

    Integrity:

    The demmi’s will do anything, say anything, sleep with anyone, consort with anyone, destroy anyone or anything and hold loyalty to no person, no country, no god.

    Real republicans say what they believe and believe what they say. They believe in liberty, freedom and loyalty.

    For some people to expect the base to change how they are wired is foolish, stupid and asinine.

    I will not give up my integrity for anyone, thing or system…….It and the love of my family are the only things I will leave this earth with. They are more precious than gold.

  6. “Like a good neighbor, Right-Wing is there.”

    “I am stuck on Freedom, and Freedom’s stuck on me.”

    “I’m a Rightie, you’re a Rightie, wouldn’t ya like to be a Rightie too?”

    Even though the above tunes were penned by a famous moonbat, we can steal borrow them. After all, Dems and RINOs have been running as Conservatives for years in order to get elected, might as well give ’em a taste of their own tactics.

  7. Here we come
    from your own precincts
    It’s our turn, so we’re saying
    the whole system stinks.

    Hey, Hey we’re the Right Wing
    The Dems have run it into the ground.
    If we can take some blue states
    We promise we will turn things around

    We just hope you believe us
    when we tell you that we’re working for you.
    And please don’t call us dirtbags
    when our campaign promise never comes through.

  8. Dumb sh*t Demos they got nothin’ else to do singin’
    Doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo

    Sticking their heads way up our “Dear Leader’s” wazoo singin’
    Doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo

    It smells good, it feels fine
    Smells good, feels fine the DemoRats have lost their minds.

  9. There once were some people who
    Decided to buy only from those of similar hue
    But instead of being branded racist
    The media made them famous
    Now we all know the way to judge who’s worth more than who.

    I know poetry is not my forte but I hoped thinking it up would help me to calm down. Unfortunately I am still furious. Sigh.

  10. 9 out of the 10 voices in your head say vote Republican.>>> Republican, the party with the pub in the middle of it.>>> Republicans, freeing slaves since 1862>>>A vote for Republicans means you don’t have Swine Flu.>>>Republican, no bucket-heads allowed.>>>Republicans, pass the ammo and praise the Lord.

  11. I have long thought it should be a re-worded version of ‘Indian Reservation’ by the Raiders. Retitled Conservative Nation. Not room for the whole thing, but here’s the intro verse.

    They took the whole conservative nation
    Put us in camp re-education
    Took away our right to life
    Our firearms
    And the bible life
    Took away our native tongue
    And taught ebonics to our young
    And all the nukes we made by hand
    Are now an outsource to Iran

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