Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
In a desperate bid to boost their cratering ratings, MSNBC will hire…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
In a desperate bid to boost their cratering ratings, MSNBC will hire…
In a desperate bid to boost their cratering ratings, MSNBC will hire…
more socialists and communists, that will do the trick!
… advisors from Al Jazera (hey, they must be doing something right…)
… Keith Oberman and Pee Wee Herman to do a point/counterpoint show.
… a handful of old hipster coots to whine about how libtard polocies just aren’t working out. They can call it The Spwew.
In a desperate bid to boost their cratering ratings, MSNBC will hire…
ratings “adjusters” who will “massage” the “data” to produce “desired” results.
…”pajama boy” as the face of a multi-million dollar media campaign to convince everyone that MSNBC is really hip. The effort will crater when audience tests reveal that people think it’s Rachel Maddow in the onesie…
…will hire Alexa.com to properly adjust MSNBC’s numbers, to wit:
http://www.wnd.com/2014/10/your-favorite-news-sites-shafted-by-amazon/
…me. Frank’s not the only one with a new job…
They heard that most viewers between the ages of 25 and 54 like cookies.
They don’t really care *what* I say.
…a carnival barker to attract contestants to the Rachel Maddow Dunk Tank!
I wouldn’t worry too much about a temporary weakness in ratings. I’m sure they will do better in an Election Year. What??? Oh. Nevermind.
http://www.popscreen.com/v/2Ht0/Gilda-Radner-Nevermind
…to insulate against further drops in ad revenue, management is in negotiations with Rush Limbaugh.
…Wendy Davis as a shoe model.
…a bunch of monkeys, but these will be trained to do less of what monkeys do.
…some guy who looks like Obama’s second cousin on his mother’s side.
…one more viewer, on spec, sanity or English comprehension not required.
…some cool guys to remake the network into MSNBC3K with running gags and commentary throughout all the shows.
…the federal Emergency Alert System to do all of the opinion segments and any news that accidentally finds it way to the studio.
…a skunk. Face it, they could certainly do worse.
@11 Dohtimes: MSNBC3K…Brilliant! Bacon to you sir! ~~~~~~
…The Weekend Update crew from SNL. Low leaning curve and they are already on contract.
…people to rearrange the deck chairs. Pay them minimum wage. Schedule them for only 29 hours a week.
…busty women to “lean forward“.
In a desperate bid to boost their cratering ratings, MSNBC will hire…
deaf, dumb and blind people in the hopes they won’t leave to watch reruns of Seventh Heaven.
…an earnest, hardworking weather girl from an obscure local affiliate, who will face hostility and humorous missteps on her way to finding true love and success…
@6. That would be sneaky. I would (gulp) actually (double gulp) watch MSNBC if they hired you.
(gawd I feel so dirty…)
… hot women willing to go on the air topless and read the news/weather. Hey, it worked for south american soap operas*.
* It was found that when they started showing nudity on south american soap operas, they increased total viewership of all such shows rather than just shifting existing viewers from one show to another.