Hello Readers,
As you may have read in the newspapers, we suffered a “tremendous defeat” in the recent elections. Now, we’re in big trouble!!
Air America is trying to raise more money. Usually,this means that they’re having dinner with George Soros or hanging out at the Gloria Wise Boys and Girls Club – but no – they are too smart for that. Now they are trying to raise money from their listeners.
Brian Maloney at Radio Equalizer has the original email posted.
However, we here at IMAO managed to secure the first draft which was written by Al Franken. Of course, later it was decided that one of the Kennedys (Slogan: It’s been ages since our last rape trial) should use the family name and reputation to help in the fundraising process.
Why is a first draft so important? It tells us what they were really thinking. Take a look at this one folks.
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From the Waste Basket of Al Franken
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Dear Friend of Air America:
After the recent elections where we proclaimed victory, it seems that I get the same three questions from conservatives over and over again:
1. “Are you on crack?”
2. “How would you define victory?”
3. “No, really. Are you on crack?”
These people are crazy and really should pay more attention to the news which is sometimes fake but always accurate.
Yes, we can rightfully claim that we did NOT lose to Bush-Cheney- and not just because they weren’t running for office this year.
Here is the list of our wonderful victories–
In New Jersy (State Motto: Even the dead vote Democrat) the Dems took the top spot for Governor. Replacing one Democrat with yet another Democrat. Net gain: Zero. Victory!
* In Virginia, voters sent a strong message, once again replacing a Democrat Governor with another Democrat governor. Net Gain: Zero. Victory!
·In St. Paul, Minnesota the incumbent Democratic mayor, was defeated, by another Democrat! Yes, even beating ourselves counts as victory.
·* In Maine, an effort to repeal a law that protects gays and lesbians from discrimination was defeated. This would have put a damper on the new Sexual Awareness Holiday: Dress as a Transvestite Day. This year the Governor will be dressing up as Madonna.
* In Texas, fully 24% of all voters rejected a ban on gay marriage. We assume the other 76% of voters were steers.
*In California (State Motto: Would you like that abortion To Go?) we gained an amazing victory in a land dominated by Republicans in every way except voter registration and population.
But now is not the time to sit back and rest on our victories. Our fight to restore progressive values in America still has a long way to go. Our values are winning.
For example, in Jimmy Carter’s new book which is available worldwide (except in Iran where it will be held for 444 days), he cites the evil corrupt Republicans for making terrorists angry at us. Jimmy Carter knows appeasement.
Values matter.
But have we made an impact? Air America has made tremendous progress in the last two years.
Sure, we don’t conform to the regular radio paradigm. We don’t believe in things like “sponsors”, “advertisers”, or even “listeners.”
Our business model includes the redistribution of resources. For example- the Gloria Wise Boy’s and Girls Club believed in us so much — that they lent us a substantial amount of money. These were funds that otherwise would have been wasted on after school programs and food.
Here’s what we’re asking you to do.

1) Join the Air America community by strongly supporting the AAR Associates campaign by clicking here
2) If you’re listening to Air America Radio on your local station, thank them for carrying your favorite AAR programs. Please beg them not to replace Al Franken with Earl’s Talkin’ About Fishin’ and Bait.
3) If you don’t yet have an Air America Radio affiliate in your area, let us know today. It will make you feel heard and that’s what really matters.
The biggest obstacle progressives face isn’t even the Bush Administration or a Republican-controlled Congress. Our greatest challenge continues to be the stranglehold of the right-wing propaganda machine over our nation’s media. Thirty percent of Americans now say that their primary source of news is talk radio.
And fully ninety percent of talk radio is dominated by the leading propagandists of the Right: Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, Michael Savage and their factually-challenged ilk.
These “radio hosts” resort to dirty tactics such as using Lexis-Nexis searches or replaying clips featuring Democrats and their actual words. Many times they resort to the dirty trick of posting our words in their entirety AND in context.
What happened to Fake But Accurate? What happened to Following Your Heart? What happened to Wishing It was True?
These people are a threat to our way of life.
With your strong support, Air America Radio has defied the so-called “experts” who said that progressive talk radio would never succeed. In some markets, we are even close to meeting the numbers previous posted by the All Caribbean station. In other markets , we come in second only to the Emergency Broadcast Signal (Another Bush-Rove plot –we’re sure about it.)
In less than twenty months, Air America Radio has grown to include more than 70 stations, reaching over 60% of the country. In many markets we are hitting the stars, which are the asterisks denoting that the audience is too small to measure, but that’s because they seek to disenfranchise those listeners. Another Bush-Cheney-Rove plot.
More than ever, we must continue that growth. With the 2006 mid-term elections less than a year away, we need Air America Radio to remain a powerful voice for progressive values in the public square.
Please won’t you give today?
As we approach the Thanksgiving holiday, which we don’t believe should be a holiday because the white man took the Indians’ land — we look forward to receiving even more money.
And that’s something for which we can all be thankful.
Sincerely,
Al Franken
P.S. For your contributon today of $25.00 or more, we’ll reward you with a special gift. A cool pen showing your new found pride in voting Blue. It has a removable cap with the initials BIC (Blue Is Cool) embossed on the barrell.
Yes, Blue Is Cool.
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Wow. Sometimes I just can’t believe what we’re up against.