Here’s a fun music video:

And with all the talk of melodramatic Glenn Beck, I forgot the joys of classic radio Glenn Beck:

Here’s a question: Can you think of anyone more pretentious than Keith Olbermann?

Hey, Olbermann, not everyone can afford to go to a fancy agricultural college!

(hat tip Hot Air)

John Hawkins put out a list of the must follow conservatives on Twitter, and it is a very good list. It includes me (of course) and also SarahK.

I know some of you are resistant to Twitter, but you’re starting to sound like old fogies who still demand to get their news through the newspaper. Twitter is where all the important stuff breaks these days. And it’s the number one place to be if you’re a Justin Bieber fan.

The U.S. Navy has lasers shooting down drones. This sounds pretty awesome, but who are we supposed to be using this advanced technology against? I mean, we have stealth bombers and lasers and nuclear subs, but our enemies these days are dimwits with AK-47s hanging out in caves. They can hardly send a donkey with a bomb strapped to it after us; they’re not going to send drones after us. All this advanced tech only seems to make sense if we were at war with ourselves.

Maybe one day advanced aliens will come to earth and get all up in our faces and we’ll be at war with them and get good use of our drone-shooting lasers, but until then we need something better adapted to taking out Ahmed as he runs around firing his old Russian rifle inaccurately as he screams, “Allāhu Akbar!” Now dinosaurs with rocket launchers on their backs would be just perfect for that. They’d fire rockets into caves and chomp down on all the terrorists that scurried out. It’s tech that just makes sense for our current threats.

I think the Jurnolist has revealed a new star of the liberal journalists: Spencer Ackerman.

File photo of Spencer Ackerman.

I have no idea who this guy is, but he has this rabid chihuahua vibe going and it’s priceless. He’s the one suggesting the liberal journalist just pick some right-wingers and label them racist to distract from Jeremiah Wright, and he adds this:

In other words, find a rightwinger’s [sic] and smash it through a plate-glass window. Take a snapshot of the bleeding mess and send it out in a Christmas card to let the right know that it needs to live in a state of constant fear. Obviously I mean this rhetorically.

And when all the Journolist members are shrieking like tweeners at a Justin Bieber concert over Obama’s win, Ackerman said this:

Let’s just throw Ledeen against a wall. Or, pace Dr. Alterman, throw him through a plate glass window. I’ll bet a little spot of violence would shut him right the f__k up, as with most bullies.

Here’s a big difference between the left and right. The left get their panties in a bunch any time they hear extreme rhetoric from the right fearing it will lead to violence, and I hear a left-winger explicitly threaten violence and think it’s one of the funniest things ever. I guess Ackerman’s rhetoric just brings to mind some pimply-faced wiener trying to act all macho. Still, it makes you wonder about all these liberal journalists hemming and hawing about extremism and then you see the lunacy they seemed to tolerate in private. Did none of them respond to Spencer Ackerman’s obvious cries for psychological help? Fighting extremism starts at home. Or on your e-mail list. Time for liberal journalists to take liberal extremism and throw it through a plate-glass window. Or we’ll beat your liberal weenies to a pulp and stomp on your necks. Rhetorically.

So do you think Ackerman wears a pointy hat?

We may not have adequate border patrol, but luckily the Mexican government is on the ball. They found a man trying to smuggle eighteen monkeys in a belt around his waist. That’s like a bomb belt for a suicide bomber, but instead of a bomb it’s monkeys! Think of what would happen if you were on a bus and a guy stood up and opened his jacket to reveal a belt of monkeys and then he released them all over the bus! I’d be like, “Why am I on a bus?! I own a car!”

If the Mexican government weren’t able to stop people like this, that country could soon be overflowing with illegal monkeys — the worst kind of monkeys. Then if we found some illegal Mexicans in America, they’d be like, “Don’t send me back to Mexico! It’s full of monkeys!” And then we’d sort of have to give him asylum… in Canada.

The Daily Caller has released even more e-mails from the Journolist, and now among the visceral hatred of people who disagree with them and wishing death upon them is a call to have FOX News shut down by the government. I have to say this is really informative to the American people to see what liberal journalists say when they think no one else is listening. I’m not saying these guys are capital F-fascists as they aren’t literally part of the Fascist Party in 1930s Italy, but they’re pretty fascist. I mean, could you imagine a country run by these nutballs? The reason the horrors of the Nazis don’t happen all the time is because it’s so seldom shrill idiots like these can ever get real power because of how they constantly turn all normal people against them.

And the best of the people on the Jurnolist just kind of stayed silent about all the crazy hatred from their fellow liberal journalists. Shouldn’t they have warned us about how mental their colleagues were and how they could get violent at any time?

Let’s take this as a lesson: When liberals gather together without any supervision from right-leaning people, they go completely cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. For an example, see almost any college campus.

The NAACP now claims they were “snookered” by Andrew Breitbart into asking for Shirley Sherrod to be fired. Well, I’m glad they said it. I was going to call Breitbart a snookerer myself, but I was afraid of being called a racist since there is a long racial history of white people being falsely accused of snookering. But Breitbart is a snookerer. A serial snookerer. That guy does nothing but snooker.

Look at how he snookered the White House. As soon as he put up the video, they were like, “Let’s set the world record for how fast we can fire a racist!” Then it ends up she was telling a story of how she changed her racist ways and helped the white farmer, and for jumping the gun the White House looks like a bunch of total inept buffoons, i.e., it’s a Wednesday.

And you all saw how Breitbart snookered me by stealing my race card. Well he contacted me and said, “You better shut up about that, or I’ll release some video that will snooker IMAO into firing you.” And I was like, “But I own IMAO and I don’t think I’ll fire myself.” And Breitbart said, “You say that now, but you haven’t seen the video.” And now I’m worried, because I did just recently give myself some warnings on language and am treading on thin ice here at IMAO, and maybe — just maybe — I’m looking for an excuse to fire myself and all it will take is some snookering from Breitbart to seal the deal!

I don’t think I should go up against Breitbart. That guy can snooker.

At Pajamas Media, I have what I hope to be an epitaph of gun control advocates. Read and be entertained!

Democrats are starting to get panicked as the midterm election approaches, so I thought I’d start a sort of charity where people can donate large boxes. That way, we’ll have something for the Democrats to live in so they don’t get rained on. Also, I think it will be a good visual aid for the American people to know that things are getting better.

“Oh no. Look at these people living in boxes. This economy is so horrible.”

“Wait a second; those are former Democrat Congressmen living in boxes. The economy must be recovering! Yay!”

So help donate boxes. Also newspapers. Newspapers have been on the decline for a while which means Democrats will have trouble finding blankets when sleeping on a park bench.