Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The TSA is doing away with naked body scanners. They’ll be replaced by…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The TSA is doing away with naked body scanners. They’ll be replaced by…
……Citizens drawn from a lottery, at random.
The winners get to ‘not come’ to the airport ,
and the losers get to keep some ‘chotschkes’.[sic ?]
The losers have to bring their own rubber gloves, speculums, and sanitizers….
(Watch out for ‘Burrito Fridays’……….)
… Rubber gloves and KY jelly
… A stage with a brass pole
… Mandatory flight wear consisting of Saran Wrap scrubs.
… Pork products on every flight
… Doctors who will ask if you’re carrying and weapons or explosives
… “Terrorist – free zone” signs at airports and on planes.
… TSA agents will be serving pre-flight meals before groping you
… Colonoscopies! … Thanks to Obamacare flight security now falls under public health.
Vision impaired (blind) screeners, schooled in the art of brail…
….. a giant hole where the money spent to buy the stupid things used to be.
… by common sense and bacon. You don’t eat, you don’t fly.
…blind squirrels looking for nuts.
…very anal inspectors.
something slower, less effective, more costly, assembled by union hands and supplied by someone’s friend from Chicago
–naked body feelers!
Guava scented personal lubricant and a DVD of “Naked Swedish Girl’s Beach Volleyball”
… hidden … naked body scanners, with greater detail and full color imaging. And a one button, ‘copy to Blu-ray’ feature.
…peep holes in the bathroom.
…free internet pron.
…the TSA agent’s imagination.
…Detective Frank Drebin.
…Detective Frank Drebin with Nordberg standing in the background trying to pull on his gloves.
The TSA is doing away with naked body scanners. They’ll be replaced by…two midgets and a flashlight.
…X-Ray glasses, as advertised in the back of a comic book.
…The Tail Hook Convention attendees.
Superman and his X-ray vision
…arming every passenger, so potential hijackers will be out-numbered.
The Probulator!
A fortune cookie with a list of all the terrorists they stopped.
….more (ineffective) TSA agents so Obama can brag about “jobs created”.
…declaring airplanes clothing-free zones.
…naked fraud, waste, and abuse.
… clothed TSA agents in the monitoring room.
…a requirement that you turn in nude photos of yourself.
Requiring everyone to sign a paper promising they will not blow up the aircraft, or threaten to do so . . . or invade Poland.
barkers shouting “step right up…..get your 72 virgins……no death required!!!…praise allah!!..right this way to paradise…death to Israel!! thwak!!!
Naked TSA agents
Experts from the beef cattle industry trained in “Applied Reproductive Strategies”
Depending upon someone’s gender, the Bill Clinton / Barney Frank retirement job.
A six hundred dollar hammer…
Magicians that hypnotize and levitate all passengers. You will remember nothing.
…the Tingler
….new agents trained by George Michael and Pee Wee Herman
…..that guy you knew in high school who had like 15 hands that you had to climb out of the window to avoid.
Cold fish of the groper Variety
. . . Volunteers from your local prison that have paid membership to NAMBLA.
Anal probes
Knockout gas for all passengers.
Bill Clinton
…such diverse elements as fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Obama, and nice red uniforms.
…the Spanish Inquisition!!! Because NO ONE expects the Spanish Inquisition!
…Mossad agents.
bill clinton
oops, sorry big al
…rule that all passengers will have to purchase so much insurance that no one will care if the plane blows up.
Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!
Bubba here.