So what’s the biggest problem facing our country? Well, obviously it’s all those fat kids waddling about. They threaten the very essence of our nation with their Cheeto dust-stained fingers and their chocolate covered faces. What if we get in a new world war but all we have are tubby piles of goo to put up against cyber-nazis? America would be over.
But good news: Childhood obesity is starting to decline. So in all this darkness, there is hope for this nation after all. And I think long after President Barack Obama is forgotten (because we’ll probably decide to have a redo on the first black president since it’s so important to get that right), his wife will be remembered as a savior of this nation for her fight against fat kids. As Michelle Obama always say, “I hate you fat kids and your freakish sausage fingers. Get away from me!” Words that will be long remembered.
Moochelle is right up there with Churchill.
Twinkies got bankrupt and obesity goes down. Who would have guessed it?
I am somewhat troubled by a nation that boasts of starving children. Is our goal to emulate North Korea? Will Michelle come after Anonymiss’ Bacon Cookies next?
Don’t worry, their “mothers” are picking up the slack.
the headline in today’s Washington Post was that Childhood Obesity in the Needy Declines (or something to that effect). If Bush were President, it would have been: More Poor Kids Starving under Republican policies
Alternate Universe points to Andy T for pointing out how the media would have handled it.
Perhaps we should call them the “Burning Bush” awards?
After all, they do create a Mosaic.
Fat People, By…
Michelle Obama
Fat People got no reason
Fat People got no reason
Fat People got no reason
To live
They got big fat hands
And big fat eyes
And they walk around
Tellin’ big fat lies
They got fat noses
And big fat teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty fat feet
Well, I don’t want no Fat People
Don’t want no Fat People
Don’t want no Fat People
Round here
Fat People got nobody
Fat People got nobody
Fat People got nobody
To love
They got big fat legs
And their standing’s so low
You can’t pick ’em up
Just to say hello
They got big fat cars
That go beep, beep, beep
They got big loud voices
Goin’ peep, peep, peep
They got grubby fat fingers
And dirty fat minds
They’re gonna get you every time
Well, I don’t want no Fat People
Don’t want no Fat People
Don’t want no Fat People
‘Round here.
The above kinda of reminds me of a song by Randy Newman from the late seventies…..naw.
“And get your cotton-pickin’ hands off my cheeseburger.”