In case you missed it (I did) there were election last night, and Republicans lost at everything! If these trends continue, there won’t be a single Republican holding an elected office by 2010 (except for Bloomberg, if that’s any consolation – and it isn’t). Glenn Reynolds blames everything on Terri Schiavo which is a little convenient since she’s dead… and, even before that, she was incapable of defending herself (which is why she’s now dead).
How can Republicans turn things around in time for next year? I’m thinking protests with large puppets. What do you think?
UPDATE: Yeah, I’m making things sound worse than they are. Come on; did we really want New Jersey?
We should riot.
monkey,
I was thinking of that, but I’m just too busy for a riot right now.
If we set the cars on fire early on, they’ll burn all night. And we’d still get plenty of sleep.
No big deal. Here in Virginia a few sillyheads were fooled and ruined it for the rest of us. But we retain the House of Delegates and the attorney general’s office, and we actually pick up the lieutenant governorship. The total swing in statewide offices is +1…to the Republicans.
I’m up for rioting. That could be fun. I’m not a fan of giant puppets, but I’m just too lazy for arts and crafts.
Democraps and other libs should be rounded up and shipped to France. France is the socialist paradise that they’ve been dreaming of. There’s an old saying “If you love something, let it go.” Well, that has nothing to do with liberals because they are about as lovable as cancer. But at least they’d be gone.
Everyone remembers how successful the “Breasts not Bombs” movement was at Berkeley, right?
(this is where you pretend a.) the protest was successful and b.) you weren’t grossed out by saggy hippy hooters)
Gentlemen and ladies, our response is clear. Nudity = success, so our campaign will be “Wangs for War/Vaginas for Victory.”
“Wangs for War” also works for any Asian-Republican groups out there. Just try to protest on a different day than the other “Wangs for War” group. We don’t need that sort of confusion.
Maybe Republicans can turn things around by acting like Republicans.
You know, fiscal restraint, smaller government, a gun in every holster.
Instead, we have a bunch of “gang of 14” whiny appeasing, spineless tards.
Kind of like Ohio RINO’s.
Yesterday, California’s voters took several more steps to hasten my metamorphosis into Iowa Jim. Same non-competitive electoral districts, the unions can still use dues for political purposes without getting affirmative permission from their members. My clients are personal financial planners for rich people, frequently for venture capitalists – people who create wealth and create jobs for other people. I’ve been watching them move to Washington and Nevada (no state income tax in either state). California voters and state and local governments have been doing and are continuing to do lots of things that chase productive people out of the state.
I don’t know what y’all are so upset about. Here in Texas everything went swimmingly!
(I just moved here from New Jersey about a month ago … HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!)
Burn everything! Riot! Into the streets everyone! Demand our rights! Whine! Err…oh yea…we have jobs and…ugh…we pay for all that stuff…and…never mind! Hey, where’s AQUAGAYQUEERMAN? He’d know what to do for sure!
I’m curious, if I send an email to each of the gang of 14 and tell them that I think they are HOMOS because they are members of the gang of 14, will I get audited by the IRS?
We win when we win; we win when they win.
Consider. Corzine is now out of the Seante; a nobody will be appointed and lose to Tom Kean Jr. next fall Gain oine seante seat, I’ll make that trade any day of the week, especially now that the Dems get to continue the corruption in NJ. We might even pick off another Torricelli gangster caught with his fingers in the till.
In Virginia, once again the Democrats proved that if they are smart enough ot get two rightists on the ballot they can split the vote and squeeze into office. The did it with Ford and Anderson; thsy did it with Bush 41 and Perot; and then agaisn with Dole and Perot. So what else is new??
The very same proposition endorsed by Republicans in CA and Democrats in Ohio failed. Gerrymandering by elected politicians is to be preferred over oh-so-self-rightious gerrmandering by unelected “philosopher-king” judges of all things. It makes me a confirmed conservative think I would have voted no.
In a final note of when we win we win; when they win, we still win. If the Jackass Party managed to get us to do a Vietnam bugout, we will win longterm. Osama will eventually incinerate downtown NYC or DC or Chicago or LA. That is ay least one big blue county that suddenly will glow the shade of very bright orange nuclear gas.
With it will go 5-10 million Jackass votes, never to return. If losing 2000 military casualties that doesan’t even replace the 4000 or so blue state civvies that Osama started this war over, is to tough to endure, I fear for their longterm survival.
My pain exists for the collateral damage of all those innocents the Jackasses will have caused to be incinerated.
Dr. Machiavelli, call your office!
Good job, Stan!
Stan that is probably the most heartening thing I’ve heard in the past 24 hours (except that on local guy i was rooting for won)
Damn, I’m stuck in New Jersey, the “armpit of the nation.” Republicans won’t be winning here this century.
New Jersey? Isn’t that the highway between DC and NYC?
protests with sock puppets, definitely!
And rounding up all the leftist ‘tards and deprting them to France … they’re desperate for more leftist ‘tards.
Um, I’d love to riot and all, but as someone with a job and personal property (as in, not bought with welfare checks) – also known as a “Republican” – I’m too busy and have too much desire to not have my own stuff torched to torch anyone else’s. Unless maybe we declare a national holiday when we can go riot in another country! Then I’d still get paid and the stuff would belong to people I don’t care about!
Wow Stan, you covered it all. Only in a blog comment can someone suggest that the destruction of a major U.S. city would be a good thing and make it sound somewhat believable. Even though I’m not completely convinced on that one point, the rest of your post was awe-inspiring and rallying. Good job!
frank, if you’re not going to MAKE time to riot, then don’t tease us.
as far as nukes go, supposedly osama’s plan is to nuke 7 cities at one time:
nyc, wash dc, miami, chicago, houston, vegas, l a. then again, supposedly he’s dead from disease.
maybe the earthquake got him. 87,000+ dead – he could be one of em.
burn every car made in paris
Can we just burn Michael Moore’s car (the man, not the cyst)? It’ll be a mini-riot.
Sugarplum,
New Jersey is this toxic waste dump on the East Coast, known as a haven for terrorists, commies, and hippies galore. It has its own unique smell, mainly from all the hippies, but also because of the factories up North.
Fred,
Makes me glad I’m in Phx, AZ if LA is going up. Though Montana might be safer. The only city I’d miss in that pantheon is Houston… because it’s in Texas. Even though they have egos that make my toes twitch toward their teeth, they at least know how to vote right.
Stan,
I hope that you die before me so that when I meet you on the other side you can explain to me all the great things that will result from my death.
Would you care to tell us all how rosey things will be for us Republicans if Shrillary were to be elected?
First call your congressman and say, “Drill ANWR you leftwing pansy!”
Oh and then call your democratic congressman and say the same thing.
As for rioting in California, that will happen soon enough when Muslim radicals rename Los Angeles “New Paris” then promptly burn it down.
Force Michael Moore to sell his Halliburton stock, thereby forcing him to buy Ben and Jerry’s and causing his stock portfolio to disappear, eventually causing Moore to die penniless.
Enact a new law whereby all Liberals that vote are immediately required to buy “Lovebugs”, cars that run by the power of love alone. Then we can all watch the fun as thousands of Liberals scream at their cars to move, since hatred is all the Left has to offer lately.
The Planet of the Apes (first movie) was based in the local of New Jersey, right?? Would kind of explain a lot.
In Virginia, once again the Democrats proved that if they are smart enough ot get two rightists on the ballot they can split the vote and squeeze into office. The did it with Ford and Anderson; thsy did it with Bush 41 and Perot; and then agaisn with Dole and Perot. So what else is new??
Not to start an argument, but I just wanted to point out that Kilgore and Potts combined STILL don’t beat Tim Kaine.
Kaine rode in on Mark Warner’s popularity (and Warner only won because Mark Early was such a weak candidate–would never talk about himself, he sounded like a broken record stuck on “Mark Warner is going to raise your taxes”).