In an understandably desperate – yet still abjectly pathetic – ploy to make uninformed swing voters and other gullible mouth-breathers hate the war (and hopefully Bush, too, even though he’s not running in 2008) – the Democrats have released a “report” claiming that the War on Terror will cost America $3.5 Trillion.
Well, that’s the headline.
The caveat being that this includes “estimated” costs for some 10 years into the future, and by “estimated”, I assume they mean either pulled out of thin air or their fat asses.
I’m not sure how we’re supposed to take these simian-phizzed Karl Marx dopplegangers’ 10-year plans seriously when they can’t even predict what their positions on key issues will be when next week rolls around.
But the most egregious flaw in their hypocritical attack-dog accounting is that they include “hidden” costs of the war, i.e. adding their own made-up, rotten apple figures to the congressional war budget number oranges.
Fine.
If they want to play that game, then we can play it right back. Let’s look at some of the hidden benefits that we’re getting for our well-invested war dollars:
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- Halliburton workers are really cleaning up on the overtime.
- Sales of Fred Thompson T-shirts are up! Up! UP!
- Ice cream manufacturers are now in the black from sales to hippy hunger strikers.
- Ditto for “Tofu on a Stick” franchise owners near protest sites.
- Michael Moore is making huge profits for the movie industry instead of living in his mother’s basement, playing Halo 3, and vampiring the filling out of Twinkies between sessions with his Happy Sock.
- Plus he can afford more Twinkies this way. I rate Interstate Bakeries Corporation stock as a “strong buy”.
- Thanks to the war, American school children can now find Iraq on a map, so most of the war budget should technically be counted under Department of Education spending.
- Batman, never lame to begin with, is getting even unlamer in 2008.
- As an alternative other the other news channels’ dreary, defeat-mongering war coverage, FoxNews invented the Perky Yummy News Babe.
- The Army re-instituting the draft for high-risk assignments in Iraq’s hottest war zones.
- I’m hoping that liberals will read that last one and flee in terror to Canada. Please note that without the war, that trick wouldn’t have worked. If it makes just one idjit leftist abandon ship, it’s all worth it.
And most important of all – ZERO Al Qaeda attacks on American soil since 9/11.
Personally, I consider the books balanced.
First off, that image of Moore with a “Happy Sock” is an image I REALLY didn’t need in my head, so thanks for that one. That aside, you have a vary good point concerning the last entry. The lefties don’t seem to realize (or more likely refuse to recognize) that this war has been on the enemy’s turf since after 9/11. The sad thing is that I’m not suprised…
Harvey, another laughter-induced stroke here. Oh, the spots … my stomach … I feel faint.
It’s just a matter of time before the federal budget reaches a quadrillion dollars and most of it will be for Iraq according to the Dem’s.
Another good thing about the war is that we now have all that sweet, sweet oil to drink. Plus, we totally learned how much fun it is to taze Ron Paul supporters, bro.
What did JFK say about “paying any price… to ensure the survival and success of liberty”? He must be spinning in his grave right now.
We’ve fought the Barbary Pirates before. Millions for defense, but not one cent for tribute.
Now if Congress could only get their Social Pragram Budgets below that amount, we could have real tax relief.
That Batman thing is unbelievably awesome!
I can sum it up in two words: Huckabee Huckabee
I can sum it up in two words: Huckabee Huckabee
Any word on the estimates if we choose not to fight this war? Anybody price a new twin tower lately? Liberals should add the dumb in front of their mascot.
And, and invaluable benefit of the war is that we now know who we cannot count on here in the US ofA. Can we spell Pelosi, Reid, Murtha, folks?
I would never have known of the treasonous ability of that bunch. Thank you George W. Bush for making it possible for America to see the traitors among us.
nuf sed