Ya know, I wasn’t sure this was a good Obamacare metaphor until after the 22-second mark. Then I was positive.
[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #460,120)
Starring:
Barack Obama as Wanted To Save Money Dad
Paulie Possum as Obamacare
Your Kids as The People Stuck With A Healthcare System They Didn’t Want.
“There’s an easier way to save: Free Markets”
[High Praise! to HokieGomer]
The Zombie Shopping Mall Experience
In this spectacular ‘full immersion’ experience, you’ll be briefed and armed by the Police Special Zombie Bashing Unit. They’ll fill you in on the full, unfolding, undead apocalypse that is going down in Reading town. An apocalypse that, for once, you didn’t cause, but will have to try and fix.
Then you’ll hit the spooky, deserted shopping mall, but you won’t be shopping for that lovely little Pashmina you saw in Littlewoods. Instead, you and your team will be depleting the zombie population with full Bronson-style perspicacity. Using state of the art special effects and large, blood-inducing props you’ll tackle a series of computer game like missions in a full-on ‘run and gun’ gore fest.
Sadly, only available in the UK right now, but I could easily imagine US versions popping up. I mean, Detroit’s practically set up for a city-wide event right now. Just add bath-salts.
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
IMAO & AMERICA IS AN OBAMANATION EXCLUSIVE!!! Must credit IMAO & America is an Obamanation!
I have obtained, from a well-placed source, the copy of the United States Constitution used by Chief Justice John Roberts as a reference during the deliberations over the recent Obamacare ruling, and it explains everything!
All you need to do is to read the fine print. Do you see it? Down there at the bottom of the document?
Still don’t see it, let me point it out. See it now?
Having trouble reading it? Okay, here, let’s zoom in closer…
{Click on the image for a better look.]
It not only explains this latest ruling, it explains the entire Obama Presidency! Oh… and we’re all screwed!!!
Cross-posted at America is an Obamanation!
I noticed #ObamaIsLikeABadBoyfriend is trending on Twitter, so let’s explore this theme:
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1) Always bringing us flowers and candy. The flowers he stole from our garden. They’ve still got bees. We’re allergic. Speaking of allergies – peanuts!… and the candy is Snickers.
2) He doesn’t throw pebbles at our window at night. He sends the EPA over with shotguns and flash-bang grenades.
3) Whispers sweet nothings to us and calls us by the wrong name. Check. Check. Double check.
4) Says he loves us, but he’s always making eyes at our hot Latina cousin.
5) We WANT to trust him, but he never looks us in the eyes when he talks – just keeps looking left, right, left, right…
6) We spend hours slaving over a hot stove, cooking him a fancy romantic dinner. All he says is “needs more poodle.”
7) Look, we knew he wasn’t really religious (“just spiritual, baby”) but would it kill him to once, just ONCE, go to church with us instead of going to the golf course with his buddies?
8) Take us out to see the MLB All-Star game, and we get all set up in a fancy skybox to watch him throw out the first pitch. He shows up in Mom Jeans. MOM JEANS! The worst part, though, were all those “why do you stay with him?” pitying looks from our friends. That, and not having a paper bag to wear home.
9) Tried to make up for the All-Star game fiasco by taking us out to see the White Sox. Drove around for SIX HOURS because he couldn’t find “Cominskey Field“. Yeah, we missed the game.
10) Says he’ll meet us for at a spendy restaurant for dinner at 7 to make up for the Sox game fiasco. Get there… turns out he got there at 6. He ordered a big steak dinner, martini, all that stuff, and then he accused us of running up the tab, and stormed out in a huff.
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And of course the WORST thing – which seems too obvious to even mention, really – is it turns out HE’S ALREADY MARRIED!
Although one look at the way Michelle’s let herself go, and it’s not hard to see why Barry would be on the prowl.
[High Praise! to Tony for the link]
A new National Geographic poll shows that people think Obama would be a better choice than Romney to handle an invasion from space aliens.
Yes, of course he would… as long as they don’t attack America from the south.
[High Praise! to Arik]
(Yes, that’s the real Medicare reimbursement rate. Or “savings”, in GovSpeak).
A little business in Minnesota called Drive A Tank that lets YOU, Joe and Jane America, get behind the controls of and drive a real tank.
Sadly, you don’t get to shoot the tank because Minnesota law prohibits firing guns from a moving vehicle. However, for a price, they will let you use the tank to drive over and crush a car.
No word on whether they have a package allowing you to drive over the full text of Obamacare.
[via Technabob]
The Ben & Jerry’s Pint Lock
Yes, it’s a combination lock to restrict access to pint containers of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream.
No word yet on how much the tax will be for not owning one, but you can expect the government to set the combination and keep it safely tucked away in their “secure database” as a convenience to you, the taxpayer.
(Combination available upon completion of the 33-page request form and approval by Michelle Obama.)
[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #8,546)
And with America’s reply, Captain James T. Kirk:
