Note to Liberals: Stop Saying We Hate Widows & Orphans

[High Praise! to According to Hoyt]

I don’t want to throw grandma over the cliff. I don’t want the poor to starve in the dark. But if we give the power to make those decisions to a distant and impersonal entity, that entity will INVARIABLY – even with the best intentions in the world – through omission and commission do exactly that to some grandmas and some poor. And right now we’re headed to a world where we write off the money we send to Washington and are lucky if it isn’t used AGAINST us

7 Comments

  1. “And right now we’re headed to a world where we write off the money we send to Washington and are lucky if it isn’t used AGAINST us”

    Sarah, to a large extent, we’ve already arrived.

  2. [the Johnson’s load their guns and point them at Bart. Bart then points his own pistol at his head]
    Bart: [low voice] Hold it! Next man makes a move, I throw Grandma off the cliff!
    Olson Johnson: Hold it, men. He’s not bluffing.
    Dr. Sam Johnson: Listen to him, men. He’s just crazy enough to do it!
    Bart: [low voice] Drop it! Or I swear I’ll throw this Grandma right off the cliff!
    Bart: [high-pitched voice] Oh, lo’dy, lo’d, he’s desp’it! Do what he sayyyy, do what he sayyyy!
    [Townspeople drop their guns. Bart jams the gun into his neck and drags himself through the crowd towards the station]

  3. Taggart: The surveyors say they may have run into some quicksand up ahead. Better check it out.
    Lyle: Okay, I’ll send down a team of horses to check out the ground.
    Taggart: *Horses*?
    [hits Lyle’s head]
    Taggart: We can’t afford to lose any horses, you dummy! Send over a couple of Grandmas!

  4. Hedley Lamarr: Qualifications?
    Applicant: Throwing grandma off the cliff, murder, arson, and throwing grandma off the cliff.
    Hedley Lamarr: You said throwing grandma off the cliff twice.
    Applicant: I like throwing grandma off the cliff.

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