WASHINGTON (AP) – After being accused of racism for skipping a televised debate at a historically black college in Baltimore later this month, presidential candidate Fred Thompson explained that it was due to a combination of scheduling conflicts and the fact that “black people ask REALLY dumb questions.”
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“Every time I see a black hand go up at a college forum,” said Thompson, “I just cringe because I know the guy’s gonna ask something incredibly ignorant.”
“For example,” he continued, “I was at Alcorn State a couple weeks ago, and this colored fella pipes up with something like ‘yo, man, mah ho’ cain’t gets no wefare, wazzup wit dat?’. Now, I ain’t got the first clue of what this idiot’s babbling about with all that yo-ing and ho-ing. I thought Talk Like a Pirate Day wasn’t until September 19th?”.
“And if it isn’t dumb-ass questions, it’s crap about why I don’t have more black people on my campaign staff. Well, I tell ya, if I could find a black guy that would actually show up to work without a malt liquor in one hand and a crack pipe in the other, I’d hire him in heart beat.”
“And before you go criticizing me for saying that,” pre-empted Thompson, “let me make it clear that I’m NOT prejudiced. I wouldn’t hire a black WOMAN, either. Damn annoying harpies with that wobbly neck-waggling thing they do when they say ‘oh no you di-int!’ and always whining about ‘dey baby daddy’… I’m a busy man. Got a campaign to run. Ain’t got time for mumbly, fatuous, minority bellyaching.”
“Besides,” concluded Thompson, “if I were going to learn a foreign language, it sure as hell wouldn’t be Ebonics. It’d be something useful, like how to say ‘kneel before Fred Thompson!’ in Arabic.”
HAH! Yer killin’ me, matey! Hope th’ dark-skinned sea-Ronin take no umbrage to yer ramblins.
Ahh, another Ron Paul fan attacks teh Fred!.
Okay, which one is the funny fake news and which one is the real one? You f’ers have me so mixed up I don’t know whether to crap my pants or go bowling.
[T]he rejections underscore the consistent absence of GOP candidates at minority voter forums.
There is a pattern here,” Smiley told the Huffington Post. “When you tell every black and brown request that you get throughout the primary process that ‘no, there’s a scheduling problem.’ That’s a pattern… Are we really supposed to believe that all four of these guys couldn’t make it because of scheduling?”
“It’s not just that they are not coming. It’s that some of them are visibly insulting us,” Cecilia Munoz, vice president of NCLR, told the Politico.
“I told them I thought they were making a grave mistake and I thought they should reconsider,” said Smiley.
“Unlike Univision which cancelled their debate, unlike CNN, which changed their date we are going live,” said Smiley. “We are delighted the other five are coming and appreciate their courage for showing up. The beat goes on.”
Avast Matey, best be warnin’ a scalliwag b’fore:
“‘yo, man, mah ho’ cain’t gets no wefare, wazzup wit dat?'”
So’s the capt’n won’t be gettin’ a mite suspicious cause o’ the LOL comin’ from the crows nest. (AKA my cube)
Seriously funny stuff!
Maybe I can’t read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn’t be running for what?????
Maybe I can’t read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn’t be running for what?????
Maybe I can’t read. I do believe Fred Thompson said those remarks. If so he couldn’t be running for what?????
It looks like Russell has a stuttering problem…
Harvey, you know to check your closet before you go to bed tonight, right? Fred is everywhere… I’d just skip sleep for a few days to avoid any “accidents”
Good Stuff!
From reading this, I don’t think Fred handled this issue very well.
Tell the truth, Harvey. This story was about Obama Hussein and you swapped out his name for Fred Thompson. Jessie Jackson was right!!!!
Damn straight, beeatch.
Now what ’bout my babies, huh, cracka?
badmartin, Republicans don’t like lending legitimacy to any organization that practices any form of racism, even if it is just a lack of race-blindness.
Avast, me Homey!
That’s one for the un-PC Hall of Fame, Harvey.
I really like IMAO. It is funney. But, I cringe when I read anything on this site that smacks of racism or nationalism. This post sounded racist to me (or at least too close to the line for me to feel right about it). I would like to see a better sense of discretion.
CP
Yeah, unlike your usual articles, it wasn’t actually funny. I wonder what the Thompson campaign would think of it? They might not laugh either.
As an educated African American supporter of John Edwards, I’d just like to comment that….
Oops, sorry, did it again. Heh, that wasn’t me either. Anybody got a frisbee?
Ahhhh Harvey
The Don Imus of IMAO.
OJ’s going to go scott free once again. He doesn’t have Furman to kick around this time but he can always use the “look what Harvey wrote” defense.
pffft.
The huff piece is a stitch, Smiley as a kingmaker.
Harvey’s piece was run off and stacked in dorm rooms all over the country last night, ready for distribution on the quad before someone pointed out it was a gag.
The “real” news is funny and the fake news gets the moonbat troops in a lather.
Funny stuff makes me laugh
Harvey, I laughed so hard that John Edwards had to escuse himself from the NOW meeting and go Freshen up.
Good one.
Fred! has a point. Why must we, the speakers of actual English, be required to deal with these assaults upon the language?
I cite the example of a student in my class yesterday.
Idiot girl: How tall is you?
Me: It’s “How tall are you?”
Idiot girl: I don’ talk like that.
My brain: OK, snap! That’s it! Are you all happy now?
You know,if I ever get the cybernetic eye implants I want, I’m making sure that they put in the “green crosshair” option (that I can turn on and off), if I don’t go with the “Terminator red glow” style.
Maybe both?