Ronin Profiles: B4B

B4B

Let’s meet some more IMAO readers. Today, it’s B4B.


What’s the story behind your name? It derives from a screen name ( Bonkers4Boobies) I used on an old (and crappy) game / chat site. As you can probably guess, it has nothing to do with aquatic birds found in the Galapagos Islands.
Where do you live? I live in Plainville, Connecticut. It’s a small town and the name is befitting. Here on the “right coast” we are awash in liberal based political correctness, but at least we make Nu-cler submarines.
How old are you? Old. So very old. I just turned 41. My bones aren’t even good for soup.
Tell us briefly about yourself. Nothing extraordinary. I’m married ( 20 years), have 3 kids. The lil one (7 yo ) we call The Camminator. My two oldest are “Bart and Lisa Simpson”. “Lisa” at 14 is a gifted young lady entering high school while “Bart” nearing 19 has matured into a selfless young man who will be entering basic training this October. All signs point to him being “over there” at this time next year after he completes his M.P. and K-9 training. God speed son. I work in Physical Therapy. The wife works for some french store .. Target I think.
What’s your favorite Bush nickname the left uses (e.g., “Chimperor”)? I don’t have a favorite. But I do enjoy the fact that the libs still can’t agree on whether he’s simply a bumbling idiot, or an evil dictator bent on world domination through planetary destruction.
How long have you been reading IMAO? Just a few months.
What’s your favorite IMAO post? I admit that I do enjoy reading the Daily John Edwards Fabulous Facts, or anything pertaining to firearms ( I love my Para Ord P-12 .45 , got rid of my Walther PPK/S because the slide on that little bastard likes to attempt spontaneous amputation of my thumb due to the high thumb position I use… no such problem with my Glock 26 and zero malfunctions after 3k rounds makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.) My problem is that I don’t frequent the site enough, so by the time I read anything it’s near archive material and posting seems pointless. I was the last to post on, “Just Something I’ve Noticed” 8/12 , the list of liberal propaganda code words …. just seconds later it went to archive.
What’s you favorite political issue? Always the 2nd Amendment, but lately it has to be all of this self-important, nonsensical rambling about “global warming”. Key fact here… sometimes the earth gets warmer, and sometimes the earth gets cooler. This has been going on since the dawn of creation, and will continue until the evil USA blows it all to hell. Get a life people. I’ll sit patiently waiting for the “global cooling” hysteria thank you.
Do you have a website? If so, please tell us briefly about it. No.
If you could shoot powerful beams out your eyes, how often do you think you could actually find a use for that? I honestly can’t think of any situation that wouldn’t call for it’s use…. from simplifying meal prep, un-clogging a drain, reducing lines at the DMV, would also be a big hit a children’s parties I’m sure…. It would be the closest we mortals could get to being Fred Thompson.


If you commented in the original post that you want to be included, you’re still in the running. Eventually I’ll have another post asking for who wants to participate, so keep reading. Thanks to everyone who has participated so far!

It worked for Mel Carnahan, right?

All this talk about John Edwards and Fred Thompson has me confused.
So, I’ll just say: help send a dead man back to Congress.
What would his campaign platform be?

Question

What is it with the Chinese and illegal money/contributions given to the Clintons. Is it just some cultural thing I don’t know about?

Daily John Edwards Fabulous Fact

john edwards fabulous.jpgIn college, John Edwards went through a cross-dressing phase and was once caught by his roommate while trying on a pair of men’s underwear.

Fred Thompson’s First Ad

Fred Thompson’s first ad is out:

The only thing I find notable about it is it’s the first official statement from him that says “Fred Thompson for President.” I was really expecting more explosions in his first ad.
Here’s my idea for a Fred Thompson ad:

TERRORISTS/LIBERALS: We will destroy America! No one can stop us!
ILLEGAL MEXICANS: Don’t destroy it all! Leave some for us to steal!
(There’s an huge BOOM! as the earth explodes and out rises Fred Thompson)
FRED THOMPSON: Now that I’m president, there is nothing but death for you here!
TERRORISTS/LIBERALS: Aieeee!
(Terrorists and liberals stare at Fred Thompson in horror and then their faces melt like in Raiders of the Lost Ark)
ILLEGAL MEXICANS: Oh no! We must flee to Mexico and improve its economy instead of disrespecting America’s borders!
(Illegal Mexicans flee leaving jobs behind)
FRED THOMPSON: Ha ha ha!
(Go to screen with fire and explosions behind the text “Fred Thompson 2008”)
ANNOUNCER: Fred Thompson 2008, Time to Die!

It’s a bit of an artsy idea because of the symbolism, but I think it would work well.

President Bush Visits Iraq to Protest War

BAGHDAD, Iraq (Reuters) – In a surprise move, President George W. Bush made an unannounced trip to Iraq on Monday in order to spread his message of “peace in the Middle East NOW!”.

“Give peace a chance or we’ll shoot your sorry asses”

“I decided to take a page from those filthy hippies I see all over D.C.,” said Bush, “marching around, undermining homefront morale, and generally stinkin’ up the place. I thought ‘if these sponge-brained mudpuppies really want the war to end, they should probably stop squatting where the bullets aren’t flying and start talking to the screwball Koran-thumpers that are doin’ the shooting’. Figured I’d start with the man in the mirror, and so here I am.”
Wearing an Alanis Morissette wig and festooned with various peacenik paraphrenalia, the President marched amiably through various Baghdad neighborhoods, speaking of peace, love, and the hopelessness of the Islamist cause. He also carried a variety of signs during the day, which bore demoralizing slogans such as “War is unhealthy for children and other living things like stupid terrorists”, “If you keep fighting, you’ll be dead and America will STILL steal your oil”, and “While you’re out here fighting, your Imam is home nailing your wife”.
Although locals were displeased with Bush’s crude, tasteless, and unpleasantly patchouli-drenched display, they did – in an uncharacteristic display of civility – allow him to conduct his protest unmolested.
“While I certainly don’t care for either his message or his aroma,” said one local Al Qaeda member, “there’s not much I can do about it. After all we DO have freedom of speech in Iraq. Or 160,000 well-armed American troops, which is pretty much the same thing.”
When asked whether Bush’s antics would dissuade him from further belligerence, the insurgent responded, “Absolutely not! I have a deep-seated belief in Allah, unshakable faith in the rightness of Jihad, and nothing will steer me away from my goal of earning my 72 virgins!”.
“Except maybe a set of Girls Gone Wild DVD’s. Hint, hint.”

Questions for Fred Thompson

John Hawkins apparently got contacted by the Fred Thompson campaign and you can submit questions to him here, he’ll pick the best five tomorrow, and then Fred Thompson will respond to some of them on video.
Or Hawkins is lying to trick us all.

Running out of Time

I’m wondering if the editors of Time Magazine have gone completely nuts.
In their bootlicking piece on John Edwards in the September 10th issue, Eric Pooley whined:

Another challenge is that much of the attention he’s gotten recently has been the unflattering kind, stories that question his integrity and assail his image as a fighter for the little guy by focusing on his pricey haircuts, huge house, and hedge-fund job. These viral attacks, spreading from the Drudge Report and other blogs to newspapers everywhere, make a dumb argument.
(snip)
“We live our lives,” says Elizabeth. “We’re not pretending to be anything we’re not.”

Once the editors finished bowing towards the Edwards’ mansion for the fifth time that day, they went over Anne Kreamer’s “The Gray Wars” piece for the Society section.
Photographers and Photoshoppers worked together to put some gray in the locks of Katie “Falling Ratings” Couric and Condoleeza “Giving Weapons To Good Palestinian Terrorists To Fight Evil Ones” Rice.
But turn the page… and you see…

Continue reading ‘Running out of Time’ »

High Praise

Since IMAO somehow ended up in search results for Google News, I asked readers for ideas for a slogan for the IMAO news division. There were a ton of great suggestions. Here are some of my favorite who get ordinary praise:
IMAO: Because news happens… and if it doesn’t, we’ll make it up.
from Devil_Dog
IMAO: In your heart, you know we’re Right!
from Jimmy
IMAO NEWS…’CAUSE YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!
from RJS
When news breaks, you can bet we broke it.
from Rick
IMAO: Because, when news happens it’s fine with us
from Son of Bob
Journalism just got a little yellower. IMAO News.
from Exurban Jon
IMAO: If it comes up on Google, it MUST be true.
from badmartin
IMAO News: When ordinary journalistic incompetence won’t do
from Raving Lunatic
IMAO: Believe us. We own guns.
from shane
IMAO News: We’re like the Value Menu for your news!
from AlanABQ
And high praise goes to…

Continue reading ‘High Praise’ »

Daily Fred Thompson Fact

Fred Thompson supports the troops by beating liberals with a crowbar.