13 Comments

  1. The dead candidate should demand:
    * The right to roll over in his grave
    * Propping-up dead candidates during debates
    * Banning the phrase: “You can’t take it with you”
    * More speed and quiet zones near cemeteries
    * Bargaining rights to voters’ brains
    * Death tax benefits to reduce carbon footprints

  2. What would his campaign platform be?
    First order of business: federal garlic-and-crucifix ban.
    Seriously, though, if we have a dead guy in the Senate, we’re down to 99 people trying to destroy the country to fill their own pockets, instead of 100. I’d vote for him.

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