How Long Until the French Are Rioting in Our Streets?

The French riots continue today, and, as much as we’d like to help our frenemies, we’re busy. Still, it’s alarming that the riots are starting to spill out of France into Belgium. At his rate, by the end of the month all of Europe will be caught in riots.
So, how do we keep the riots from reaching America?
Luckily, there is an ocean between us and Europe (if you don’t believe me, try and find a map of the world using Google). Still, we should now make sure that any boat reaching our shores or plane landing on our… uh… land does not contain rioters. We should have people with like guns and badges in charge of this. Shiny badges. It is time to take this seriously before our own citizenry get infected with riotousness.
And, as always, if any government official wants to give me a badge, I promise to abuse my power to the betterment of the American people.

15 Comments

  1. Look Frank, you’re letting me down. This is your big “French Riots” post? it’s only a few paragraphs.
    This whole riot thing seems right up your alley. You should have written some short story involving about the riots by now, where the US saves the French again, and then the French pretend that half of them were members of a secret undergrand resistance against the rioters, after the rioting is over and everyone is safe.
    Come on, I need silliness! And quick! These riots have gone on so long … I’m actually starting to feel sorry for the French, instead of hating them!

  2. Ah, let me help you with the sauerkraut thing. You see, when the French smell sauerkraut, they instinctively think of Germans and flee the streets as they expect a well organized army of goosesteppers to come marching by. Riot problem solved. Vive le sauerkraut!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.