AMANA, Iowa (AP) – After claiming that his wife Hillary was “swiftboated” during the recent Democratic debates, Bill Clinton was immediately inundated with complaints about his insensitivity to the Vietnamese-American population.
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Pham Manh Cuong, founder of the Vietnamese Anti-Defamation League, explained his outrage. “Bill Clinton used ‘swiftboating’ to describe how his stupid cow of a wife can’t give a straight answer to a simple question. The fact is, American swift boats inflicted many traumas to my people during the war. These swift boats cut off my limbs and razed my village in a manner reminiscent of Genghis Khan. How dare he make light of that!”
Presidential hopeful Barack Obama dismissed Cuong’s reaction as ‘hypersensitivity’. “Come on. It’s an election year. I think old Fat Man Chong just needs a thicker skin. Besides, it’s not like Bill said ‘lynching’, which would be highly offensive to my blackitude.”
Although not outright apologizing, the former President did offer a clarification. “I understand the term ‘swiftboating’ may have been offensive to some people whose votes nobody cares about, which is a shame, really, because those guys make good fortune cookies. Anyway, I suppose I should’ve chosen my words more carefully. I meant to say that I thought Hillary had been ‘Auschwitzed’.”
OMG, Harvey, you the best at news fakery. you must have a lot of time on your hands there in prison!
THIS JUST IN: In an odd twist, coincidentally, all of the members of the Vietnamese Anti-Defamation League simultaneously committed suicide today, each apparently shooting himself behind the ear, then driving to a park…where they were discovered by authorities.
Auschwitzed: Gased and burned. I think Dodd and Biden would have enjoyed that.
Auschwitzed…very funny, Harvey. A few more:
“Pearl Harbored”
“Nagasakied”
“Bastogned”
“Alamoed”
“Fort Sumptered”
“Waterlooed”
“Guadalcanaled”
that’s probably what barak thought…black pain is the only pain. when someone comes out saying that someone said something offensive and they should apologize…well, if it was not directed at a black person, then it’s not offensive and they should grow thicker skin.
take your own advice and if someone says the ‘n’ word…like oh, dog the bounty hunter, in a private conversation with his son…get over it!
😉
thank you!