Straight Line of the Day: Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around?

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around?

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58 Comments

  1. It was brought in from another country, no one knows anything about it, and even though it was only supposed to affect the middle class it’s killing everyone.

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  2. Once one catches it, it becomes hereditary, and it’s debilitating effects will be passed on for countless generations

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  3. …everyone is required to get it

    …apparently, Romney gave it him because 10 years ago, Romney worked for a company that did some financing for Baskin Robins.

    …symptoms include uncontrollable spending, irrational decision-making, delusions of grandeur, and a complete inability to comprehend founding documents of coutries.

    …it’s racist

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  4. …it causes your taxes to go up, your savings to be devalued, your work hours and benefits to be cut back, and your guns to be confiscated.

    …symptoms include frequent shrugging.

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  5. I had an allergic reaction to the medicine “provided” by ObamaCare, and was forced to be “provided” with more. I then went home and paid my taxes worth 17 times more than the medicine would have cost me.

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  6. Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around? Medical researchers immediately pegged it as a form of swine flu.

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  7. Its like a ObamaPhone, except instead of phone calls, you get a fever.

    Its like ObamaCare, except…actually its identical to ObamaCare.

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  8. Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around? It apparently causes Baby Boomers to feel guilty, black people to feel suckered, Chris Matthews to feel a thrill up his leg, and the rest of us to feel pretty much bent over.

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  9. Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around? The CDC advises to treat it with plenty of rest and chicken poodle soup.

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  10. Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around? Researchers tracked its start at the White House and its spread through GM and Chrysler, and then to China. It apparently won’t die out until the Chinese are all wealthy as hell.

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  11. Have You Heard About the New Obama Flu That’s Going Around? The Republicans had the vaccine, but they blew their chance to innoculate us from it.

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  12. It only affects !% of the population.

    The CDC is calling it the “Plague of Color.”

    It comes on strong, wipes you out, and leaves you weaker.

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  13. …it’s caused by the Humanity Deficiency Virus.

    …if Obama does not make you throw up you are sick as hell.

    …the cure for it can’t be amended because when you catch it you get to administer the shot.

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  14. Americans appear to have no immunity to it – a genetic trait linked clear back to a similar flu called “FDR flu” in the 1930’s when many capitalists died.

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  15. Yes, indeedy I have. In fact, we’ve all had it for while now, and it got so common, we all thought ‘that’
    was ‘feeling normal’. But we’ve got “Doctor Barry” to make it bearable and so, here’s hoping we’ll all feel much ‘betterer’ in the morning , on January 21, 2017.
    Scuuuze me now, I got to go ‘Smile’ really loudly……..Look,…macaroni……

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  16. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? It gives you cramps. so you keep bowing all the time.

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  17. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? Doctors prescribe fresh air and 18 holes of golf to cure it.

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  18. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? It started in Kenya, spread to Indonesia and Hawaii, and somehow ended up in Washington D.C.

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  19. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? It causes people on entitlements to have hallucinations that this country is being run well.

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  20. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? It causes people to take 3 days off from work..then a week..then a month..then a year…….

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  21. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? Doctors prescribe a Barry..Ummm enema to anyone who complains about it, with the simple instruction to shove it up your Republican Donkey.

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  22. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? Scientists are working on a vaccine, but sadly it is about 4 years away.

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  23. Have you heard about the new Obama Flu that’s going around? Instead of ringing in the ears- it makes you hear “mandates” that are not there.

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  24. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

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