Here’s a prediction of what 2011 will be like made by Thomas Edison in 1911. Apparently, it was an all metal future to him. Your chairs will be made of metal. Your house will be made of metal. Your books will be made of metal. Sandwiches, children, lawn — all metal. Also, he thought we’d be transmuting gold fairly regularly, but our alchemy skill have been kinda disappointing in the past century.
Anyway, it’s easy to make fun, but I guess I should try this out. Here are my predictions for 2111:
* All phones will be so small and so light that they’ll actually be lighter than air and float way, meaning phone calls will rarely be answered.
* Selecting people for anything — be it political office, jury duty, job in the mail room — will be done via reality TV shows.
* Saying anything over 140 characters in length will have you imprisoned by our robot overlords.
* Zombies will evolve into extremely fast moving creatures and zombie races will replace dog races.
* Movies will consist of so much CGI action happening at once that they’ll be completely incomprehensible to the human mind. And be in 3D.*
* College will be so expensive and so useless that half the world’s GDP will go towards paying student loans and people will need at least a masters to work at Arby’s.
* Everyone will have with them little computers which will hold every book, song, TV show, and movie ever made, though 99% of the time they’ll be used to play Angry Birds.
* Girls will go crazy for singing stars like Justin Bieber with more and more hair on their head until the most popular tweener idol is Cousin It.
* Government will grow so large and be so expansive that we only get one dollar each to spend and the rest of our money will go towards unneeded bridges named after Senators
* Blankets will evolve to not only have sleeves, but eventually pants legs and pockets and buttons and zippers. By 2111, “blanket” will be just another word for “clothes”.
* TV news will consist entirely of just putting up a picture of whoever the hated conservative of the day is accompanied by incoherent screeching.
* The country will be run by a clean, articulate self-reading teleprompter.
What do you think 2111 will be like?
* This may have already happened. I tend to avoid movie theaters these days.