Question of the Day

So what do you think Obama’s reelection chances are right now? It will depend a bit on who the GOP candidate is, but I’d like to think Obama’s chances are already pretty dim. It’s well established he’s a useless idiot, so hopefully come election time people will want someone who it’s possible isn’t an useless idiot. Still, lots of people think if the economy improves some he’ll get reelection easy because Obama is all likable and stuff.

What do you think?

Why Liberals Allow Themselves to Like Dead Conservatives

We’re reaching the 100th birthday of Ronald Reagan, and it’s interesting how even President Obama can speak fondly of him now. It’s a bit counterintuitive that liberals seem to start to like conservatives after their dead. You’d think the longer a conservative was dead, the even more conservative he’d seem in comparison to today and the more he’d be hated, but liberal hate of conservatives is not a policy difference, it’s an emotional one.

Like if you remember when Palin first came on the scene: Liberals knew instantly they hated her because she was a threat politically and reasons came later. It’s an “us versus them” mentality that comes from not keeping politics in perspective, but after the politician dies and they no longer have this emotional feel the person is a direct threat and an enemy. With the emotions gone, they can then look at the person as an actual human being. This will happen with any conservatives that liberals hate today for non-coherent reasons. For example, “Bush lied, people died” is not a meaningful statement that is going to last many years, and we can expect in the future liberals to recognize all the good qualities in Bush that they refused to let themselves see while he was president… maybe even while he’s still alive since he’s stayed out of politics and isn’t seen as a threat.

Anyway, no real point, but I just thought it was interesting. We like to think politics is about the issues, but so much of it is pretty meaningless and just the same mentality as really liking one sports team and hating another. And we can come up with the reasons later.

New White House Press Secretary

So the new White House Press Secretary has been announced, and we here at IMAO wish him luck. It won’t be an easy job. For instance, people are going to ask why when the country is out of money does Obama keep proposing more spending as a solution. There are three reasonable answers to that I can think of:

1. Obama doesn’t really care about jobs or the economy.
2. Obama is an idiot who doesn’t understand how the economy works.
3. Obama is secretly a Muslim terrorist who is trying to destroy the country from the inside.

Now, as White House Press Secretary, Jay Carney can’t use any of those answers. Instead he has to babble on about jobs “saved or created” even though there are only about seven people left in the country who doesn’t find that phrase laughable.

Here’s my idea, though: An M84 stun grenade. You may know it as a “flashbang” from Call of Duty and other video games. It makes a loud bang while issuing a blinding flash, causing both temporary blindness and deafness in people nearby. If Carney gets a real tough question about Obama’s stupidity that he can’t think of any response, just throw one into the press room. When people’s sight and hearing come back, maybe they’ll have forgotten what the question was in the first place. Thought I guess this has the potential of making things even more awkward.

Random Thoughts

Where did the phrase “arts and sciences” come from? Why in the world would we group those two things together? “Mom, can I have more money for math and comic books? …No? Why do you hate math?”

Saw a poll asking whether people would want to cut funding for “arts and sciences”. Bet would be different if the two were separated.

So is Herman Cain a real candidate with a chance in the primaries? I’d kind of like a business focused candidate who isn’t Romney.

If we didn’t have the internet, where would we store all our snark?

Now that I’m a father, I seem to be vulnerable to emotions again. I thought I left those back in my childhood.

If someone needs an anti-Mike Pence slogan, here’s a free one: “Pence is a ponce!”

For a pro-Mike Pence slogan: “Mike Pence – Makes Sense”

I’m boycotting CPAC this year. You probably won’t notice since I’ve never been to any of the previous ones.

Maybe it’s because I saw it second, I found the British Office more awkward, less funny. Didn’t really get it.

Catapults

According to reports, Mexican drug smugglers are using catapults to fling marijuana into the U.S.

National Guard troops operating a remote video surveillance system at the Naco Border Patrol Station observed several people south of the International Boundary Fence preparing a catapult and launching packages over the International Border fence, according to U.S. Customs and Border Protection.

This sounds like some Mythbusters episode. And, it sort of was. It was 5½ years ago and the episode was Border Slingshot:

Can illegal immigrants fire themselves 200 yards across the border and into the United States with a slingshot so accurate that it can land the human projectiles safely on a carefully placed mattress?

So, why have we gone from shooting Mexicans across the border to shooting pot across the border?

Economics. With the current job market, there is a bigger demand for pot than there is for Mexicans. We don’t need as many Mexicans to do crappy jobs. We have pothead Americans that will do that.

But, the slingshot, catapult, or trebuchet could be used in another way. So far, it’s only been used to send things into the U.S. Why not use it to send things out of the U.S.?

Useless things. Like what, you ask?

  • Obama.
  • People that voted for Obama.
  • Season nine of “Dallas” (if you are my age, you’re still pissed about that).
  • The ending of LOST.
  • Kos.
  • MSNBC.
  • Dennis Kucinich.
  • Harry Reid.
  • The New York Times.
  • Yappy little rat-dogs.
  • Oprah.
  • Julian Assange.
  • Janet Napolitano.
  • Al Sharpton.
  • David Duke.
  • Cecil Newton.
  • Liberals.
  • Ron Paul.
  • Ron Paul supporters.
  • Meghan McCain.
  • The weird chick from the Progressive commercials.
  • The Geico Gecko.
  • Any Aflac commercial that doesn’t have either Earl Billings or R. Lee Ermey in it.
  • People that call soccer “football.” (Yes, I know, and I don’t care.)
  • Berkeley, California.
  • Most of the rest of California.
  • Moderates.

We don’t have to fire them into Mexico. We could fire them into Canada. Or the ocean. Or, if the slingshot is powerful enough, back to their boyhood home. The landing might be a little rough, though. Be sure to bring a pillow, Barack.