I started looking into that new immigration bill the Democrats and Marco Rubio are putting together, and I don’t think it is really as advertised. I found some rather interesting provisions that they seem to be keeping hush hush about. Provisions like these:
- A provision requires putting legal aliens in a melting pot until tender.
- The citizenship test for those requesting amnesty include sections on bomb making and the fundamentals of Sharia Law.
- The Fast and Furious program will be expanded to provide guns to Mexican American drug dealers.
- Amnesty comes with free registration in the union of your choice.
- ACORN will be in charge of organizing communities and voter registration for all new immigrants.
- Regarding voter registration for new citizens, proof of life is optional.
- Texas and all its proceeds will now be a fully owned subsidiary of Tijuana.
- A new, less offensive National Anthem will be composed and performed by Brad Paisley and LL Cool J.
- New labor laws will include a mandated daily paid siesta.
- All illegal aliens, regardless of ethnicity, will be given a $500,000 settlement as reparations for the Mexican-American War.
- Amnesty will not be considered for undocumented French Canadians. Into the melting pot with them.
- The bill establishes a separate, lower minimum wage for landscaping and housekeeping jobs.
- Maybe it’s an error, but the sketch of the proposed border wall, drawn on a paper napkin, indicates that the wall will be 16” tall.
- Amnesty comes with a get out of jail free card redeemable at the federal or state correctional facility of your choice.
- Lastly, cock fighting is finally legal.
It’s sad that words don’t actually mean what they used to any more. Illegal used to mean “your butt is going to jail”. Now it means “let me show you to the nearest benefits office, senor.”
YGDFT!YLRATSOTE!! (NAACP)
Undocumented bacon to seanmahair!
http://tinyurl.com/YGDFTYLTATSOTE
I’d figure they’d give California to Tijuana, it being right there in the upper left corner of .mx. There’s a whole couple other states between them and Texas.
@ 3, Ya, but California has been so mismanaged, even Tijuana wouldn’t take it off our hands.
Hilarious. I’m particularly taken with the 16″ Stonehenge–uh, wall–and the treatment of French Canucks. Them snowbacks are a menace. As for the rest, I like the siesta idea….
Fredkey, couldn’t resist the Spinal Tap reference.
I’ll have no truck with any changes to the National Anthem! Already it begins with asking our guests if their view is unobstructed: “Jose’, Can you see?” Seems a very appropriate kick off to any sporting event. I do have a little trouble with the word ‘donserly’. Looks like an adverb but appears to be modifying ‘light’, a noun.
donserly?
Isn’t it “down, surly light”? Using the Shakespearean reference to that moment of sidereal time when total darkness is said to occur immediately preceding sunrise.
Oh, within my blackened soul, to the depths of my midnight heart, I say “down, down, with yon surly light”, never knowing the rise of warmest illuminations.
–Henry V, Pt.II