If Ahmadinejad wants to visit Ground Zero, let him. When he’s out in the open there, snipe him in the head. If the international community complains, just say, “It was a random sniper. This is America; sometimes there are random snipers. Probably never find him. What are you gonna do?”
This is why I should be in charge of stuff; I offer solutions.
Right on.
//”Don’t snipe me bro!”
I was gonna suggest that someone should show up and pelt him with bacon bits (the real ones, not the crappy soy ones), but I like your idea much better.
hey g!
just use a bacon-dipped bullet! see, i offer solutions too!
How’s about Booosh officially invites him and then kidnaps him to GITMO! Then, bikini-clad women with dogs on leashes can escort him to his cell and serve him pork and beans.
Hey it’s NY. Don’t they put guys in the foundations of new construction all the time…
For that matter, invite all the heads of state from the different countries that hate us. Sniper ALL their sorry butts & claim “NY NY, it’s a helluva town…”
And the gayest comment on Killing Ahmadinejad is Alan(NOT BBQ)ABQ with his Musical Theatre reference.
Great suggestion! Is there a “wide stancer” bathroom that we can suggest he “visit” before we snipe him? Or could we possibly taser him first just to listen to the little prick squeal like a school girl? How about getting him totally drunk and then get pictures with him and Rosie…now THAT would shut his ass up!
While inviting every head of a hostile-to-the-US country is a good idea, if we only sniped a few, the rest would probably start behaving soon afterwards anyways. Why have so much senseless violence?
Wait… what am I saying? KILL! KILL! KILL!
Also, “the Bronx is up and the Battery’s down. The people ride in a hole in the ground.”
I’m allowed to like musicals; I’m a girl. 🙂 (I actually have never seen that one. I just googled for the lyrics)
In my defense, DesertElephant, I worked as a staff carpenter, welder, and scenic painter for the Alb. Civic Light Opera Association for several years (now Musical Theater Southwest); you can’t help being exposed to the songs when they rehearse in the scene shop. It’s not my fault I know the tunes!
Now if you’ll ‘scuse me- the hills are alive with the sound of mus… uh, gunfire.
Nothing says “Welcome to NY!” like a .50 round to the melon from a Barrett M107 at 1300m. }:-)
We need to set up a patsy.
Better yet, screw the sniping, and hand him two fifths of scotch, keys to a Ferrari, and Ted Kennedy. Point him in the direction of the Brooklyn Bridge.
I think the Secret Service should take him straight from the plane to Ground Zero and introduce him to the construction guys there. Then they can all join in a stimulating and enlightening chat about terrorism. Everyone will feel much better. Almost everyone.
I like your style, Alone. It’s a heckuva shot from 1300 meters, but, hey, for our homicidal foreign guests, nothing better than a demonstration of some good ol’ American style squirrel shootin’ to welcome them here. Of course, any squirrel hit with a Barrett .50 isn’t going to fill a decent teaspoon, but Mahmoud’s going to be pumping an awful lot of Advil down the hole left on top of his neck to complain over much.
So, that’s what’s been holding up the construction of the Freedom Tower. They’ve been waiting for the right “building materials”. (see #5)
Of course, then we’ll have to dispose of the trash. I recommend feeding him to pigs, and using the resultant manure to fertilize flowers around a synagogue.
This is why I should be in charge of stuff; I offer solutions.
You’re right, Frank; I’m writing you in for just about everything from now on. The alternatives are Dianne Feinstein, Barbara Boxer, Anna Eshoo, Sally Lieber, and Joe Simitian. You’d be a definite improvement.
Some guys over at LGF are talking about physically impeding him and holding a protest.. I think that should be enough.
I think he should be the Grand Marshal at an impromptu Gay Pride parade. Barbara Boxer and Nancy Pelosi could attend.
Ahmadinejad’s violent and hostile reaction to the gays would cause such an enormous mental conflict for Pelosi and Boxer that their heads would explode.
With them out of the way, we’d do what we intended to do all along. We’d shoot the bstrd.
That’s a great idea, Gullyborg. Have Kennedy be his chauffeur while he’s here. There’s no classier welcome than to be driven around personally by a responsible congressman.
Frank – I wish you wouldn’t say things like that. Your suggestion has stirred up feelings in me that I’ve never felt. You see, I’ve never been attracted to a man before.
IDEA – Treat him real well, give him a guided tour, the whole nine yards… and then give him a big going away party… and then take him back to Iran on Air Force One and leave him there, completely surrounded by fields of glass and ruins, because while he was visiting the WTC sites we would have bombed his country into nothing.
Pennies from heaven. ’nuff said.
You know when I heard on the radio this morning that he might go to Ground Zero to place a wreath I was outraged. The only way that slimy terrorist son of a b!tch should be let near Ground Zero is if we are taking him there to execute the mother f*#$!&. For all we know he could have supplied the money for the plane tickets and even if he didn’t we all know he was jumping up and down after the 11th.
Iran’s Crazy Midget should be put into the time capsule in the cornerstone of the WTC memorials to be opened on 9/11/2101
Alright, I had a suggestion, but then I realized that they tested it on Mythbusters, and it was proven wrong. However, now, thanks to Corona suggesting something else to which that happened, I will gleefully add my genius:
Pork bullet!
I’m not sure a Barrett light 50 could inflict any meaningful damage. A Caterpillar “Rachel Corrie Signature Edition” D9 on the other hand…
if akhnad imanutjob wants to lay a wreath in honor of those who murdered on 9/11 he’ll have to wait for the next democrap president
Best. Post. Ever!
Hey, my cousin paulie, he knows a guy who knows a guy… People come to New York, you know, stuff happens…bada bing, bada boom. Tehran calls, we play the whole “Ahmadine-what? Yo, you got the wrong the numbah.. we don’t know nobody like that”
Next time the Ayatollah wants to visit him, give em a map of the meadowlands…
This is why I should be in charge of stuff; I offer solutions.
True, but your solutions are too grounded in common sense, and unfortunately anything with an ounce of common sense is ignored by government officials these days.
Would very much appreciate an uprising of security officials though. If they were to back each other up, whose to say what justified killing might happen to the this iranian swillsucker.
1300 meters away is to good for this P.O.S. I’d grab that cross-eyed midget by the throat and stuff my Isreli made Desert Eagle in his moutn so he could look me in the eyes when I squeeze the trigger.
Posted by: Pissed-Off in Arkansas
I would think it would be much more fun to have Green Berets hold the man down while an elephant tramples him for 15 minutes. We could even invite the press. Then, we could act all shocked and blame everything on poor security at the zoo.
I was thinking the same thing. I’m sure we have many top-notch snipers who would gladly draw straws for the opportunity.
Wait, Doesn’t it say somewhere in US law that you can’t allow State sponser of terrorism into your country?
It should be.
There should also be an amendment that we shoot them directly after confirmation of identity.
After all, We do the same thing for terrorists.
I hope.
Haha! Yay for sniping terrorists!
Of course we all know why AhmadineJihad wants to visit Ground Zero… He only wants to honor the fallen! You know, his brave fallen terrorist troops, who sacrificed their lives for his cause?
Shoot him dead!
I have a different idea. We should let him visit the site, but have about a hundred cameras trained on him from every angle, far enough away so he doesn’t know they’re there. With some telephoto lenses we should be able to see every smirk on his face. We need to record every second he’s there, and we need to allow him and his entourage to go unescorted. Then, with some shotgun mikes or audio bugs, we could hear everything he says, too. Bug his car, while we’re at it. This disgusting piece of human-shaped slime would almost certainly allow his ego to get the best of him (I hope). As soon as we have him grinning and gloating on camera, we have him and his groupies pummelled within an inch of their lives by construction workers with heavy metal tools and steel-toed boots, and send them back home looking like meat-pinatas. We then show the video to the world, so nobody can deny any longer that this man and his regime are evil, and they want to destroy us.
As much as I agree with your idea, I’m pretty sure sniping a foreign leader on foreign soil is how WWI started….although, since Iran seems to be the next item of agenda on the “Bush-Middle East Renovation Plan”, we might as well get a head start.