President Bush is having talks with Vladimir Putin. Considering the unstable relation we have with Russia now, President Bush should be careful what he says to Putin. Specifically, there are ten things I thought of that he shouldn’t say, and, in case he feels the need to say some of them, I put them in an ordered list so he knows which ones to most not say.
TOP TEN THINGS PRESIDENT BUSH SHOULDN’T SAY IN HIS TALKS WITH PUTIN
10. “Bet you twenty dollars I can obliterate your country before you even get a quarter of your nukes in the air.”
9. “I really liked your red and yellow flag better.”
8. “You’re funny looking and your odor is displeasing.”
7. “If your country has a civil war, you’ll understand if I back the other side, right?”
6. “Now be honest with me: If I want to get things done, should I be talking to you or the Russian mafia?”
5. “So what continent exactly is your country on?”
4. “If I shake hands with you, I won’t catch evil, will I?”
3. “So do you have a Mexican problem in Russia, too?”
2. “Ha! You farted! I’m gonna call you Vladimir Toot’n!”
And the number one thing President Bush shouldn’t say in his talks with Putin…
“You understand I pretty much have no power to act on anything I’m telling you, right?”
1) Can I fix ya a nice baloneyum ‘n cheese sandwich? Vlad? Vlad, you in there? Aw, ya di’nt go switchin’ souls on me again, didja?
11.) The Black Caviar tastes like burnt peanuts.
I liked number 10 best… if only be because it’s true.
1) “hey I talked with Kim J. in Korea the other day and he said he thinks you’re a homosexual – said when he sees you he’s gonna rip your head off and stick it up your gay ass!” “What do you suppose that was all about?”
See Frankj? This is what your lack of editing does, you actually made a mistake in the title of the post! I’ll fix it for you.
Top Ten Things President Bush Should Say in His Talks with Putin
I would also replace the one about Mexicans (Bush doesn’t really think we have a problem with Mexicans in our country, we have a problem with people who hate Mexicans who shouted down his “compromise bill”)
So #3 should read
Remember what the Russians did to the last Tsar.
Yeesh. My mother’s in Russia, and within fifteen minutes she already told me that Communism was back in full force there. (If it ever went away).
And she knows communism. Her mother ran away from Tito’s Jugoslavia, but she went to visit the country later, before it split. Her horror tales woke me up to the reality of communism but fast.
#. Hey Vlad, yore boys got any more of ’em thar counterfeit $100 bills handy? Laura wants some lotto tickets.
Wow, Dad was right. You really do look like Dobby!
Is evil really contagious???
Uh oh.